He's lost that lovin' feeling?

Hi all

Not sure if this should this should be here or in the sexual forum..so please move me if need be.

My ym and I have been together for just about a year and I've noticed a definite decrease in the "little thing" factor. He no longer nuzzles the back of my neck in a deliberate attempt to turn me on in public......he no longer fondles me from behind just "because". Our sex life is (and always been) incredible, but now that we've been together so long, I find myself wanting more...I want to make love sometimes, not just have sex. I'm sure you girls know the difference.

He sometimes refers to our sex life as " making love" but I'm not sure he really knows what that is. I do so much for him....back and shoulder rubs, ear nibbling, neck kissing. Now don't get me wrong, he's a GREAT guy, who does so much for me and my kids outside of sex. And strictly sexually, he takes care of me just fine. But I find myself wanting those little extras, you know?

I often think I'm being really selfish because I have nearly everything a gal could want.....

What do you all think?

I think sometimes we have to ask for what we want. Guys tend to not think of the little acts as important. They are what you do when courting. And now he "has you". He needs to hear from you that these little things are important to your life together as a couple.

Thanks for the replies!

Nessa, he is definitely NOT detached in bed!! It's just the prelude that seems to have gone by the wayside.

I did mention this to him yesterday so time will tell if he's listening or not. If not, maybe I'll just slap him upside his head. :eek:

Originally posted by Atheena


Nessa, he is definitely NOT detached in bed!! It's just the prelude that seems to have gone by the wayside.

I did mention this to him yesterday so time will tell if he's listening or not. If not, maybe I'll just slap him upside his head. :eek:
Atheena, don't talk to him about it; just take matters into your own hands. My husband has been tired lately due to lots of stress that we've been having (1 week ago, on my son's 18th birthday, my son totaled my husband's 2002 car which we'd just paid off in full and which had depreciated by several thousands of dollars, for example). My husband has been working a lot lately and has just been exhausted; if I were to wait for him to make a move at this point, it might take a long time. I have seduced him about 6 times in the past 24 hours and it has worked each time (even at 2:30 in the morning)! Try it....it just might work! It did for me;)

Atheena,
As someone who is highly sensitive to this sort of change too, I find it really important to talk it out with my partner BEFORE it becomes a major issue. Specifics help....sometimes just expressing your feelings is not quite enough to get your partner to understand exactly what you want, or when. Also, i find it helps to focus on your partner's positives, and ask for more of what you like rather than being critical...a man who loves you can be very insecure about his ability to please you, and criticiism can hurt your sexual relationship if you use the wrong words.

I had one of these kinds of conversations with my bf only this weekend.....its been a year for us too. I found him very responsive. Please give it a go!