Met your significant other online?

Hi,

Just curious as to how many of you in relationships met your significant other online -- whether it be chat rooms, message boards or the online personals. I only know 2 couples who met online.

You would think working in a law office that I'd meet lots of interesting men, but no such luck. The only men I meet are either already married, getting divorced (don't want to get into the middle of that), filing bankruptcy (have enough probs of my own in the money dept.), or are criminals of some sort. So...I'm giving the online stuff a try. I figure it can't hurt. (Gee, I guess my post is more like "non-relationship" support) :)

I stumbled across this site by accident and spent about a week reading posts. I'm sure glad I found it -- y'all seem like a terrific bunch of people.

Anyway, I'd love to "hear" your stories of finding love online and am open to any advice.

Thanks a bunch!

Chiron

welcome to ageless Chiron!

not sure if i should contribute . . . i haven't exactly found reciprocated love just yet, i'm still in the early stages of it, but I definately found her online, but not through a dating service.

She and I met on a fandom messageboard while i was still living in canada. She casually mentioned dropping her a line when i finally got settled here in the UK. we didn't meet with dating expectations, just making a friend, but things went incredibly well.

i should say, that i had met a bunch of people i knew under similar circumstances in person as well, but none of them were people i got together with again. I consider myself extremely lucky, she is a heck of a catch if it's meant to be.

Travel to foreign lands, and meet an amazing woman? i was the last person i thought that would happen to. it's a beautiful thing when life surprises you in such a wonderful way.

Lewis and I met on a game. lol. we umm, didn't get along at first? nah, lmao, he was ugly to everybody. me included !!!
but he got away from these two *insert expletive* and he and i got to be friends. this was for about 2 weeks, then he left the game and came back...4? months later. a mutual friend of ours, on the game, called me and we 3 way'd him. he then called me back, under the guise of wanting the friends phone number and we've been talking ever since. he told me he was "feeling" me the third night and had confessed his love by day 5. that was over 6 months ago. and i've never been happier. he's all i could ask for. we spend countless hours on the phone and have discussed in detail our future together. he told me in no uncertain terms that i was what he'd been looking for and we were getting married someday soon. lol, now soon for us might mean a year maybe a lil more. but a future is ours for the taking. i can't imagine loving anyone else after him. he's my perfect man.

oh, i'm 32 and he's 19. WE are in love and it is perfection.

Tracy

well that is the only place i've mannaged to get a date since becoming single again

basically tried every dating site there is :D (can give you some reviews if you need them)

haven't made it much past the *first date* stage for most of them. but have made some really nice friends. one came from spain to visit me even.

My boyfriend and I met 3 years ago when he answered my personal ad on Singles.net. I also met my 2 previous boyfriends through personal ads. It is the best way for me to meet guys, especially since I am shy. You can really filter them out before you even decide to meet them in real life.

My advice is to post a descriptive ad where you specifically list your qualities and personality characteristics and specifically list the kind of man you are looking for. I always put in the subject line or headline of my post that I wanted to meet a younger man, since they are the only ones I date. Also, be very clear about the type of relationship you want.

I always posted my photo and would only correspond with men who sent me theirs.

Sometimes, it takes a while to refine your ad by judging the quantity and type of responses you get. I always preferred getting few responses because that meant my filters were working. But, I am an unconventional woman who was looking for an unconventional man, so my candidates would have to pass a lot of hurdles before even contacting me.

Place an ad in several different dating sites so that you get maximum exposure. Just be careful that you don't accidentally post it in the red-light section which a lot of sites have for people looking for short-term or insignificant relationships, unless that is what you are seeking.

Good luck!

For over three years I was a member on a fitness board. I use to frequent this board with my then fiance. I rarely posted but read posts often. Last April, my fiance and I broke up. Prior to our break up, in March, I started posting often on this particular fitness board. I was the only regular female who visited the board. I became good friends with many of the guys and met several of them at a meet up in Las Vegas.

One day in July 2003 I was on the board joking around with the guys in a thread. A new member joined that day and posted at an outrageous speed. In less than 8 hours he had well over 200 posts. As childish as this sounds, I was really upset that his new member was posting on threads months and even years old. I was upset because he messed up "my" forum. This was a forum where naked pictures of women were posted. I pretty much supplied all the photos found in this forum. (No they weren't pics of me.) So because my posts were now burried I told myself I didn't like this new guy. I thought he was weird, maybe even a porn freak. LOL!

Then, a few weeks later I found out I was accepted to a university in Ottawa. This new member's location was Canada. So for some reason, I decided to PM this weird porn freak new guy to ask him about gyms in Ottawa. I wanted to find a gym right away possibly even before going to Ottawa. It turned out he didn't live in Ottawa but his cousin did. He contacted his cousin, who he had not spoken to in several years, to ask him about gyms in Ottawa. Then I thought maybe he is a porn freak but at least he's nice. I was going to be moving to Ottawa on October 13, 2003 (Canadian Thanksgiving) to attend a university in Ottawa. A few weeks prior to my planned move day I decided I didn't want to move. My new niece was to be born later in October and I really didn't want to miss her birth. So I stayed in Florida.

Let me back track a minute... The weird porn freak guy and I started exchanging more PM's and eventually a few weeks later in August he sent me his phone number and told me to give him a call sometime. It was a toll-free number at his job. I kept the number but never called him because I still thought he might be a wacko. He would ask me almost daily when I was going to call him. I always had some excuse for not calling.

Then in September, one Saturday, I found myself completely bored. What do I do? I decide to call this weird porn freak guy I was exchanging PM's with for about two months. We talked for maybe 10 minutes and right away I loved his energetic spirit. He had to go but asked me to call him back, that night I called about 8 times, each time speaking maybe 8 minutes. Then we started talking via MSN Messenger and on PM's on the fitness board. I thought I'd never talk to him on the phone again. A few weks later, I called him again, this time I even gave him my number. Every day before he'd leave for work he would call me. He'd call me again when he came home from work. We did this for about a month.

Then our birthdays came in late October. By then we both had developed feelings for eachother that went beyond friendship. On my birthday, Oct. 25th, I called him and pretended I was more drunk than I was. During my "wasted" state I told him how I felt towards him. I expected him to now think I was the weird one. Instead he told me he felt the same. For a few weeks he thought there was no way I had feelings towards him the way I did. He questioned why I wanted to meet him in person and pursue a relationship with him. He told me repeatedly that he was too old for me. Blah, blah, blah. He even went as far as posting on the fitness board general chat section about women dating older men and how big of a gap was "okay" in society.

On a different fitness board that he also frequented he posted the same question and included that he felt strong feelings for someone 18 years younger but wasn't sure if he should pursue it. I heard from some friends that he was a member at this board so I joined under a different name, so that he wouldn't recognize me. I posted a reply to his thread saying that perhaps this young woman had the same feelings for him and he's never know if it would work unless he gave it a try. The worse that could happen would be that they wouldn't be compatible. So finally a few weeks later he was reading the responses to me and I confessed that I was the person who posted that.

Then we talked about meeting to see what would happen. Unfortunately we weren't able to meet right away due to our schedules. But finally we met and have been happy together ever since. :)

Neither of us were looking for a relationship at the time when we met. Neither of us were interested in someone younger or older but it all happened that way. I couldn't be happier! We have an amazing friendship and loving relationship.

Thanks so much to everyone who has responded so far. This is great -- after spending time wandering these boards for a week, I knew I could count on getting good feedback here!

Kelley, I did go check out your website to read yours and Tim's story. That was very sweet. (And, yes, I did sign the guestbook.) It certainly gives those of use still searching hope.

"Then, a few weeks later I found out I was accepted to a university in Ottawa. This new member's location was Canada. So for some reason, I decided to PM this weird porn freak new guy to ask him about gyms in Ottawa." Loved your post, Bella. This was funny with a happy ending. Your story and Tracy's just go to show that we should be careful with preconceived notions and / or first impressions. :)

"Sometimes, it takes a while to refine your ad by judging the quantity and type of responses you get. I always preferred getting few responses because that meant my filters were working." Thanks for the good advice Patricia. I think I definitely need to refine my ad because the responses I'm getting right now are so totally off from what I'm looking for. Putting it in the headline about seeking a younger man makes a lot of sense, don't know why it didn't occur to me. DUH!

Dakotabelle, if you have advice on which sites are good and which ones to steer clear of I'd be very happy to hear it. It's hard to tell at first and so many of them make you join before you can even look around at all. It's frustrating to take the time to fill out their stuff and then look around and find out it sucks.

"Travel to foreign lands, and meet an amazing woman? i was the last person i thought that would happen to. it's a beautiful thing when life surprises you in such a wonderful way." Canadianlove, I feel that way too. I have wonderful fantasies about traveling to foreign lands and finding an amazing guy, but can't imagine myself actually doing it! My sister actually did this a couple of years ago though. Perhaps I just need to be braver.

I'm so glad I found this site! You guys ROCK!!

Kelly (Chiron)

I met my fiance online. He said hi to me in a yahoo chatroom. We became friends and it developed into something more.

My y/man and I met online at a place called THE PALACE. A friend of mine had a Palace there (there are many) and the day I met my y/m there we became friends right away. We met there daily and talked for hours. Then we also started talking on AIM messenger most of our free time. Soon we found we could tell each other anything and were evolving into something more than a friendship which scared us both at first because of the age difference, but by then we both felt we had something we didnt want to lose. .
We met after about 4 months, and its now almost 3 yrs later. We have been living together for over a year now and personally meeting online can be better than meeting in person to start with in my opinion, but Im not talking about meeting someone at a pick up site or somewhere where its all about hey baby your hot, Id love to meet you etc.
We tend to judge a person when we SEE them, according to how they look and if thats ok then we look deeper, or sometimes just overlook the jerk they are because they are so cute or sexy or have such a gorgeous body. but online if you find someone you really click with as a friend, you get to know that person from the inside first, the part of that person that really matters ,the heart of the person , and when you meet , they are beautiful to you already because of who they are and not necessarily because of what they look like to the rest of the world. Two of my best friends have found their mates online, are married now and very happy. I plan to marry this coming year and so for what its worth, Im all for online relationships but again, I caution against the pick up sites because for the most part thats just what they are. and not where youll find someone who wants a lasting, honest, and commited relationship in my opinion from what ive seen.

I met my current lady thru Yahoo Personals..which has worked out well because I'm not into the bar scene, or much of a church goer, so I figured the best way was thru the personals.com avenue. Plus if your interested into finding a mate overseas then it's the easist way to reach out and touch somebody.

Sometimes it takes awhile to find that perfect match and believe me I filtered thru many but when you find that special one then it's all worth it...good luck.

;)

Troy and I met online playing a fantasy role-playing game, Neverwinter Nights. ( I tried the 'match' sites for a while but had absoulutely NO luck, so I gave up). I was not looking for anyone by then, we just started playing together. Then we started chatting via ICQ. Then starting phoning. Then we met in person, and now we have been living together (he had to move here from another state) for going on six months and plan to be married hopefully next May. :)

My husband and I met online 3 1/2 years ago in a chat room. He was in Australia, me in the States and it took a while to meet face to face. We are now living in Australia and have been married since January, 2004.