last1standing
09-14-2004, 10:15 AM
Yesterday, the NASA deep space probe Voyager 2, which -- after leaving our solar system -- had spent the last several years hurtling through empty space, came within sensor range of the starship Stratocaster; currently assigned to patrol this sector of the galaxy. The Inter-Galactic Council For The Preservation of Audio-Environmental Quality had assigned the Stratocaster's captain, RobinAlbertEricCarlosStevieRayNuno DerringerJohnson and his crew with the five-year mission of seeking out and eliminating all sources of "lame licks" in the known universe. After bringing the Voyager 2 probe onboard, the ship's science officer examined the small golden disk he found attached to it. Believing it to be some sort of crude storage device for audio data, he set about the task of deciphering the information it contained. After many hours of research, he discovered how to retrieve the data and convert it back to sound. The entire crew of the Stratocaster listened as the sounds were played back over the ship's P-A system. After a few moments, they all responded in unison..."What the hell is that crap???"
Captain D-J had his orders and knew his duty; so he pointed his ship toward the original source of the offensive noise and ordered "full speed ahead". The Stratocaster is now sitting just outside our moon's orbit...the earth squarely in the cross-hairs of her mighty "Marshall" sonic cannon. We have just received a message from the ship's captain, who says he is willing to give us earthlings one chance to prove that we have some worth as a species. We must transmit one guitar-smoking, amplifier-frying, microphone-melting cut that will prove to him that we really do know what ROCKIN' is all about. We have ten minutes.....
OK folks, the future of the earth is in your hands....what one (recorded) song, by what artist, from what album do we send them???
Captain D-J had his orders and knew his duty; so he pointed his ship toward the original source of the offensive noise and ordered "full speed ahead". The Stratocaster is now sitting just outside our moon's orbit...the earth squarely in the cross-hairs of her mighty "Marshall" sonic cannon. We have just received a message from the ship's captain, who says he is willing to give us earthlings one chance to prove that we have some worth as a species. We must transmit one guitar-smoking, amplifier-frying, microphone-melting cut that will prove to him that we really do know what ROCKIN' is all about. We have ten minutes.....
OK folks, the future of the earth is in your hands....what one (recorded) song, by what artist, from what album do we send them???