My OWW

I'm in a relationship with an older wonderful woman. It's my first and definitely my last (planning to marry her). She's 41 and I'm 21. There's a 20 year gap. There's also a gap in the distance that separates us. She lives a couple thousand miles away. But in the last 4-5 months I've been able to see her twice. The time in those two visits was about a month. The last time I've seen her was about a month ago. When we stayed at this wonderful Breakfast and Bed. It was a great time as usual. I love spending time with her, and I sure can't wait to see her again.

And I have to say that month we've spent together is the best time of my life. Her and I were definitely meant for each other. She's sweet, nice, and pretty. And she makes me happy...what more can I want?

How did we meet?

We met through a message board, and soon started chatting on AIM. I developed a crush on her, which went on for a little while, and on a fareful New Year's Eve chat all our feelings came out in the open. And it progressively went from there...

[Off topic]Don't you guys/ladies hate when other people (who are definitely being judgemental) stare? We've gone to different places, and we've been stared at a lot. It made us really uncomfortable once when we went to an Italian restaurant. The waiters kept staring at us. The thing about that is that I hate the staring, but in the end I just don't care enough about it since I have her. And she's the most important thing in my life. I'll never see those people again, but her I'll see forever.[Off topic]

This is our first ow/ym relationship. I just wanted to tell people (who understand) about it.

:)

P.S. Of course there's another little twist to all this :D which I'll tell you guys about tomorrow.

Hi FrenchStaff and welcome to agelesslove. Congratulations on your relationship! And since you're in a long-distance relationship, let me make you aware that we have a forum specifically for those in long-distance relationships (LDRs) and it's found right under the New Members section on the main page.

About the people staring, fortunately, for me, I haven't experienced that yet. But, it's something that most of us in age gap relationships experience at some point in time. How you deal with it will all depend upon your attitudes in the years to come. It sounds like you two have a wonderful beginning so far.

Now, about holding out more info until tomorrow... well, that's just not fair! :mad: You need to tell us now! I can't bear waiting to find out what it is. :p

WELL! me 45, hubby 24! at first i was SO self conscience, until i noticed one HUGE major thing, the people who stare are the ones who are looking outside their own relationships and the ones you say something are usually miserable in their own lives.

this is a True-ism.

so, i started thinking that they must be staring at us because
1. We are so good looking......
2. Adam is awesome to look at, he has many tattoos
3. Or they were looking at me wondering how i kept such a young stud.

however, the real reason most likely does not cross the minds of the small minded people who look. the only reason i am with him is because i love him. He is such an outstanding person anyone who prejudges him is a jerk. sorry, but i am in a NO TOLERANCE zone if anyone messes with my adam.

It sounds like your have a great relationship with your ow, that's great. Love thrives when there integrity and respect between people regardless of age, gender, race or creed.

As for the staring, you'll get used it, it has nothing to do with ignorance or jealousy (alot of people have wonderful relationships themselves of whatever age and we shouldn't be so ****y to think age gap relationships are THE best)...we're so free with judgements here but can't stand it when its done to us...I just think that its a new venue for alot of people and it will take quite a long time for people to catch on. kind of like interracial relationships...it certainly not always acceptable even in the best of families, but people learn to get to know these people and eventually the blinders come off and we realize that people are people regardless of colour.

All you can do to change the wiring and the way they view ow/ym relationships by being the best possible person to this ow/and she to you, and give these kinds of relationships a great foot forward. I find people will judge the intentions of a ym more then any other attribute they may have. So treat her super well...and show those others that ym/ow relationships "can be made from the good stuff on earth". Good luck to ya.

Paris