Thoughts

So I am pretty new to the concept of an LDR. I was thinking last night what has happened to me in the past month since I entered this LDR and realized what it changes me into:

Paranoid
Sad
Lonely
Insecure
Scared
Unconfident
Doubtful
Crabby

When I was not in an LDR I was:

Carefree
Happy
Secure
Confident
Optimistic
Happy-go-lucky
Constantly laughing
Light-hearted
Fulfilled


I started to realize that if I am putting myself through all this on purpose so I can be with my YM, I must really frigin Love him. I have never missed someone so much as I do him. I have never cried so much over anyone. It's amazing what my choice is given the state I have been in for the past month. I just hope that the characteristics I have suddenly and unknownly adopted for the time being, do not start to change my core person. And I hope my YM realizes that I am really not like this, not normally. I pray he understands and I pray that he will be patient with me as I try to "get used" to this. (Any day now, right? pffff!)

I would never wish this on anyone. But, I know when I hear his voice or get that email or see him, I realize why I am doing this. It's those reasons that we must all remember and believe in, in order for us to make it through.

We have to just keep the faith.

Believe!!!

Very good observations.

Just don't forget to be the woman he fell in love with....

Peace,
thatgirl

Thank you, Dragonfly for your kind words.

I remember the day I adopted the philosophy of "Just don't forget to be the women he fell in love with..." It was an afternoon I had spent with my at that time, future Mother-in-law. She was going on and on about what type of wife my husband "wanted and needed" and everything she said was everthing I was not. It just kind of clicked in my head while she spoke that he loved me because I *wasn't* any of those things. If I would have been a twenty-two year old listening to that woman, I probably would have tried to fit her mold. At 35, I had the widsom to be thankful for who I was and to know I was desirable enough the way I was--if I wasn't, he wouldn't have asked me to marry him, right?

Lesson learned:

Don't mess with perfection! ;)

(giggle)
thatgirl

*nodding* it is a hard road, and at times to remain true to who you "really" are. be patient, be kind to yourself, be honest with your partner.
having now my LD partner of 21 months now with me... we look back at the growth, the honesty that we developed during that time. there were days of tears, anguish, fear... stay as true to the goal as you can, be gentle with yourself when the days are hard. the rewards are great...

Posts like these remind me of why I keep coming back here. :) I think someone should collect all of the simple yet profound statements made on this forum and create a calendar - each day a different sentiment.

Today's could be "joyfully dance around your pitfalls" . Thanks Dragonfly