Angst

I find myself completely obsessed with a younger man - he is 27 and I am 42. He is all I can think about - I think about him first thing in the morning, the last thing at night and all the time in between. I can't get up the nerve to tell him how I feel. I talk to him on the phone, send him emails and see him at work. We are friendly towards each other. I know he is very attracted to me, but I am very afraid of rejection. No matter how hard I try I can't stop thinking about him. What should I do?

Yep, I agree . . . tell him!!!!

If he feels the same way, look at all the time you're wasting worrying when you could be together.

And if he should happen not to feel the same way, you could be moving on instead of worrying yourself to death.

Go for it!!!! :D

I kinda look at it like going for a swim in the freezing cold ocean. I hate cold but love the swim.

But I usually start to try and ease my way in but that hesitation is so slow and painful...

Then I just hold my breath, jump in and get it over with.

So you have choices.

Think about it in agony.

Walk away with fear and stay safe

or

plunge in and see what happens.

Maybe the water will be just fine. You arent gonna know unless you get brave and follow your heart.

By the way my ym and I are 25 yrs diff and completely in love. It can work.

I can't get up the nerve to tell him how I feel. Welllll.... I don't think that I would tell him how I feel. I would flirt and add little "come'ons". Then I would ask him out for a drink or coffee. See how it goes from there. Good luck!

LOL Barbara . . . I just don't have time for that dance! :D

If I were unattached and in the OP's shoes, I would approach the YM and say, "You know, I'm finding myself very attracted to you. If you are having similar feelings toward me, I would certainly like to get to know you better. Maybe we could have coffee or dinner sometime?"

While it is true that a lot of the YM here are the pursuers, it is also true that a lot of them have not been taken seriously in past attempts at dating older woman, or they think they will be laughed at . . . those YM may need a little more nudging.

JMO :)

Sorry, girl, you gotta make the first move, or do yourself a favor and let it go.

I vote for the former.

Ask him if he wants to walk to Peets/Starbucks with you one day. Ask him if he wants to go grab lunch. Ask him to happy hour. Heck, walk with him to the parking garage. Do SOMETHING to put yourself out of the realm of work but not so far out that it couldn't be construed as 'friends'.

Have lunch or an afterwork ****tail and just act like you would at work. Act like a friend. A friendly-friend. ;)

Maybe something will come up in conversation that you're both interested in doing (a concert, a special play, an exhibit) and you can go together.

Do something, baby. :)