The Graduate

Hi, I'm just wondering if anyone has seen the movie, The Graduate? (1967, by Mike Nichols) Isn’t that a film that actually works against age-gap relationship? I'm really not good in analyzing film and therefore I ask for some help here. They gonna show that film at a channel tonight and I were asked over to some friends for some snacks, chatting and we’re suppose to look looking on that film.

I haven't seen the film but I know it’s about the newly graduated student, Benjamin Braddock (Hoffman) who get seduced by Mrs Robinson (Bancroft), but the one he really in love whit is Mrs. Robinsons daughter Elaine (Ross).

I mean isn’t this a very classical picture we get here of an YM getting some sex (love) experience from an older woman? He’s unsure of what he want out of live and meanwhile he has an affair with a woman, older than himself.

Perhaps I’m over reacting, but my friends know that I’m having doubts over getting serious with a YM but I don’t want them letting me have the wrong pictures over the possibility to have a serious relationship despite age difference. So I need to prepare with some arguments if an eventual discussion occurs!

Hi Air, yes in my opinion that movie does shed a negative light against OW/YM age gap relationships. It's not really even about an OW/YM relationship. It's about a woman who seduces her daughter's b/f. It's the stereotype that most of society tends to associate with OW who are in relationships with YM and is not at all typical of most of the relationships that are discussed on this forum.

So, yes, you should probably be prepared for some arguments. But, I'd also remind them that that movie was made nearly 40 years ago. Tell your friends that this is the 21st century and it's time for people to become more accepting of OW/YM age gap relationships and understand that the REAL ones are not about seducing younger men just for sex.

If you want a couple of movies that show AGR's in a more positive manner, try "How Stella Got Her Groove Back" and "White Palace", they have happy endings!
Or look around Ageless, we have Nessa and Bri, Kelley and Tim, and Marcy and Devon, Guin and Lancelot, Kittylane and her guy ( sorry Kittylane for forgetting his name), all our happily married couple's, leading the way into a more enlightened era!:)

Actually, she seduces her friend's son. Then his parents set him up with her daughter, but she forbids it. They fall in love, he confesses the affair, she claims he raped her & they try to marry off the daughter. She's really a nasty person and he's just directionless until he falls for the daughter.

I just saw "PS" and it was a cute OW/YM story. And "Tadpole" shows it from the YM point of view.

Originally posted by babes66
If you want a couple of movies that show AGR's in a more positive manner, try "How Stella Got Her Groove Back" and "White Palace", they have happy endings!
Or look around Ageless, we have Nessa and Bri, Kelley and Tim, and Marcy and Devon, Guin and Lancelot, Kittylane and her guy ( sorry Kittylane for forgetting his name), all our happily married couple's, leading the way into a more enlightened era!:)

And let us not forget Peachy and Joe!
They may not be married, but I think they should head the list of successful age-gap unions!
Yeaaaaaaah!

recently, my husband and i jumped on a bus in italy just off base, i was beaming, holding his hand and whispering in his ear and behind me two soldiers started humming the tune of the movie you mention.

i died, i literally melted.

i lost it, i called them every name under the book, my husband looked extremely puzzled dropped my hand.

i died again, realizing he was embarrassed by me.

i was WRONG, he was just taken back that i was attacking two higher ranked soldiers, he then grabbed my hand and put his arm around my sholder, HE HAS NEVER SEEN THE MOVIE AND HAD NO IDEA WHAT THEY WERE DOING.

the two soldiers, RAN off the bus at the next stop.

Adam, extremely puzzled asked me what the hell i was doing?

I explained it to him, I was HOT, I wanted to go to their superior, I am a military wife damn-it, and they were out of line.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

ALL THAT MATTERED WAS THAT HE GRABBED MY HAND, AFTER I ASSAULTED TWO HIGHER RANKED SOLDIERS, HE STOOD BY ME, EVEN WHEN HE DIDNT KNOW WHAT I WAS DOING.

I HAVE MARRIED A PRINCE.

Originally posted by kittylane
- -

ALL THAT MATTERED WAS THAT HE GRABBED MY HAND, AFTER I ASSAULTED TWO HIGHER RANKED SOLDIERS, HE STOOD BY ME, EVEN WHEN HE DIDNT KNOW WHAT I WAS DOING.

I HAVE MARRIED A PRINCE.

That's awesome!:D

Originally posted by Sage
And let us not forget Peachy and Joe!
They may not be married, but I think they should head the list of successful age-gap unions!
Yeaaaaaaah!

Thank you, Sage :D

I do believe that those of us in successful age-gap relationships would certainly denounce "The Graduate" as being a mascot movie for us. Ann Bancroft played a detestable woman who was preying on a young man who had no clue. In fact, this very movie could be part of the cause of the negativity that the OW/YM relationships receive. I agree that there are much better movies that depict the situation in more positive light.

[EDIT: Why didn't somebody tell me I spelled "us" as "use?" :( ]

Why thank you Sage!!!

Now where's your tip jar! :D

Kittylane....I am sorry that those two idiots did that! I think of you as one of the kindest people (from your posts) on this board and feel badly for what happened. I'm soooo glad your husband responded the way he did. I'm also glad you cursed them out!! Good for you for standing up for yourself!

i would like to start of by saying that as far as movie making is considered mike nichols' the graduate is a classic.i dont know whether it throws a negative light on ow/ym relationship , personally speaking i dont feel she did anything wrong in seducing him.as afar as the afterwards goes well anything can happen then.

by the way has anybody seen mike nichols' latest"closer".

and as far as arguments go, i dont think you need to prepare anything,if you like it go for it.

Nice to see you posting again Terminal. =)