Optimism

I think that a great deal of success or failure in life depends on the amounts of confidence and optimism that people have when facing a difficult task.

The past two months had been very rough for me. I was torn as to whether I wanted to pursue a relationship that offered me so much happiness despite the fact that my lover was 12 years older then I. I also struggled with the fact that my family was not supportive of the relationship as well.

Now things are much better. We both decided to make a total committment to each other. My family has gotten to know my girlfriend, and my mother has actually taken a liking to her. (helps that they are both Irish).

My friends have always been important to me, and they all think that my girlfriend is a great person, but they all agree that I should not seek anything long term from this girl.

There are/were lots of obstacles that stood in the way of my happiness with my girlfriend, and belive me, there were lots of obstacles for her as well. (Perhaps hers were harder to deal with)

Nonetheless, we have decided to go full force, no turning back, and I am excited to start a life with her.

Just thought I would get it off my chest.

Well.. congratulations on your decision. I doubt you will regret it.

But... but... I take issue with you saying on the one hand that you've "decided to go full force" but on the other hand, in the very same message, you say "that you should not seek anything long term from this girl." Contradictory!!!

Just pointing that out. You can't do both. It's either all or nothing!

My guy is 13.5 years younger than me. We've been living together a year in 15 days! Dating for 1.5 years and have been friends for 3 years next month.

Sure, there has been some adversity, but most of those who dished it out are over it now. He's good for me and I'm good for him and our relationship is fabulous. It's not a "one day at a time" kind of thing anymore.

So... go full force or listen to the bilge your friends are dishing out to keep you teetering on the edge... but you can't have it both ways.

;)
~phos

That's great! Your perseverance can be an inspiration to some.

I wish you all the happiness in the world. :D

What more can be say?

Faith47

Ignore your friends and their misguided advice. With only a 12 year age gap, you two are almost physiologically the same age (men statistically die 7 years earlier than women), you probably barely look like you have an age-gap, and you are relatively close in "eras" of growing up. Your friends don't know what they are talking about....But YOU DO !!! :) You love this woman and feel it's right for you....jump into the deep end, the water will be fine!

I agree, it's not your friends in the relationship with your lover, it's YOU! It's your life, your decision.

Your friends may have good intentions (thinking they are protecting you), or alterior motives (don't want to share your attention with her), but ultimately, this is your relationship.

Do your friends interact regularly with your partner?