NancyGooGoo
06-17-2005, 02:31 PM
Hi everybody! This is my very first post here and I'm so thrilled I found this forum!
Okay, so let me let you all in on MY older woman (me being 40) and younger man (him being 24) situation --- and it IS a situation, let me tell you!
It started innocently enough in a chat room that we both frequent. He chatted me up and I went along for the ride. Soon we were IM-ing each other outside of the chat room and we began chatting almost every day with each other. He kept hinting at the fact that he wanted to meet me and I kept changing the subject because when it dawned on me that there was SEVENTEEN YEARS between us, I just shook my head at such a nutty idea!
Until one Saturday....I woke up and turned on my computer. Almost immediately he IM'd me. He was in a bit of a jam! He'd gotten kicked out of his roommates place. Some stupid dispute of some kind and although he found somewhat of a shelter to stay in, he didn't know what to do with lack of funds. (He'd been at a library and that's how he was IM-ing me). Well, at first red flags were flaring all over my head but the more we chatted, the more I saw how desperate he was, so I agreed to help him out somewhat. I picked him up at a bus station after withdrawing $50.00 from my savings to give to him. THAT WAS OUR FIRST MEETING TOGETHER! He was extremely embarrassed at the way this initial meeting turned out but I reassured him that it was all right. I drove us back to my apartment where we sat and talked and worked out the initial shyness between us. We soon left to go get Chinese Food and bring it back to the apartment where after we ate, I noticed him beginning to get frisky by beginning to tickle me and bop me with the throw pillows on the couch. I was nervous about all that so I teased him about him having to do my dishes that were in the sink from the night before and he actually did them! Afterwards, he called me in the kitchen and when I peeked my head in, he said, "Come here." He threw the over-sized hand towel around me and pulled me closer to him and him and his 6 foot lean frame wrapped his arms around me giving me this warm squeeze which soon turned to him whispering in my ear, "Would you mind if I kissed you?" Well, what could I say? I looked into those AMAZING BLUE EYES and found myself speechless! He kissed my cheek which then moved to my neck, throat and back up to my lips! OH MY GOD!!! Well, I was jello at that point but managed to slightly pull away and said to him, "I think we should go watch some television!" Well, a lot good THAT did, because what started out as snuggling quickly turned into us heavily making out and feeling up each other and before it got too out of control, I told him it was time for him to go. He totally understood and when I was driving him back to this shelter that he managed to get himself in, he asked if we could do it again. Well, weekends turned out to be him sleeping over and then it turned into 3 day weekends, meaning him coming over on Friday nights and leaving on Sunday. During the week we'd talk on the phone and he'd tell me about this situation that he was in with the whole shelter thing and him not liking it, even though he WAS working but it was only part-time. (He'd quit his full-time job before finding somewhere else to work and that's when his luck turned for the worse). Anyway, fast-forwarding to now...he no longer lives at the shelter due to the fact that I decided to put him up but only for THIS MONTH (JUNE). I made it a point of telling him that by June 30th he has GOT to find a place to move into by July 1st! Well, since then, we've managed to have a really down-to-earth heart-to-heart and he brought something to the forfront that TRULY paralyzed me! He confessed to not being comfortable sleeping with me (not sexually, but actually sleeping with ANYONE in the same bed), because he'd never really done it before and even though he's had girlfriends before he's never felt comfortable actually sleeping with them in the same bed. That was blow #1 ---- Blow #2 came when I asked him was he uncomfortable having sex with me and he sort of admitted that he was only having sex with me as some form of PAYMENT because he felt that was the only way he could truly show his gratitude. THAT JUST TORE ME TO PIECES!!! I mean, that night I cried myself to sleep while he slept in the livingroom on the couch. He's been sleeping there ever since. However, the dynamic between us hasn't really changed. We DON'T live like roommates but we're no longer really LOVERS, either--- BUT, he'll drop little hints and make remarks to the fact that he DOES think of me as MORE than just a FRIEND and although I've become quite concious to NOT make anymore lovey-dovey moves on him, he tends to kiss me on the cheek once in a while and hug me. So, I've decided to follow HIS lead and when he's ready to move back to where we were physically, I'll be ready! (Hell, I'm ready NOW---he was GREAT in bed)!!! Anyway, I digress....Oh, and in the midst of all of you reading this, I also forgot to mention that he's white and I'm black! Now THERE'S a twist, right?! I guess, letting all this out, I have a question--- am I a fool to think that once he gets his situation in order (a place to stay), that he'll still be interested in me? He hasn't done anything to indicate that he's NOT interested in me, but he does seem slightly gun shy when it comes to us having a sex again. However, when we WERE having sex, he was SO attentive and took his time and never rushed. So, I guess you can say, I'm getting mixed signals...should I just continue doing what I'm doing (which is really just following his lead, but still managing to have fun with him) or should I be more firm in letting him know that I'm doing him a favor and that he shouldn't take advantage of me? Okay, after you clear your heads from all this reading, someone let me know, all right? Thanks for the time! :)
Okay, so let me let you all in on MY older woman (me being 40) and younger man (him being 24) situation --- and it IS a situation, let me tell you!
It started innocently enough in a chat room that we both frequent. He chatted me up and I went along for the ride. Soon we were IM-ing each other outside of the chat room and we began chatting almost every day with each other. He kept hinting at the fact that he wanted to meet me and I kept changing the subject because when it dawned on me that there was SEVENTEEN YEARS between us, I just shook my head at such a nutty idea!
Until one Saturday....I woke up and turned on my computer. Almost immediately he IM'd me. He was in a bit of a jam! He'd gotten kicked out of his roommates place. Some stupid dispute of some kind and although he found somewhat of a shelter to stay in, he didn't know what to do with lack of funds. (He'd been at a library and that's how he was IM-ing me). Well, at first red flags were flaring all over my head but the more we chatted, the more I saw how desperate he was, so I agreed to help him out somewhat. I picked him up at a bus station after withdrawing $50.00 from my savings to give to him. THAT WAS OUR FIRST MEETING TOGETHER! He was extremely embarrassed at the way this initial meeting turned out but I reassured him that it was all right. I drove us back to my apartment where we sat and talked and worked out the initial shyness between us. We soon left to go get Chinese Food and bring it back to the apartment where after we ate, I noticed him beginning to get frisky by beginning to tickle me and bop me with the throw pillows on the couch. I was nervous about all that so I teased him about him having to do my dishes that were in the sink from the night before and he actually did them! Afterwards, he called me in the kitchen and when I peeked my head in, he said, "Come here." He threw the over-sized hand towel around me and pulled me closer to him and him and his 6 foot lean frame wrapped his arms around me giving me this warm squeeze which soon turned to him whispering in my ear, "Would you mind if I kissed you?" Well, what could I say? I looked into those AMAZING BLUE EYES and found myself speechless! He kissed my cheek which then moved to my neck, throat and back up to my lips! OH MY GOD!!! Well, I was jello at that point but managed to slightly pull away and said to him, "I think we should go watch some television!" Well, a lot good THAT did, because what started out as snuggling quickly turned into us heavily making out and feeling up each other and before it got too out of control, I told him it was time for him to go. He totally understood and when I was driving him back to this shelter that he managed to get himself in, he asked if we could do it again. Well, weekends turned out to be him sleeping over and then it turned into 3 day weekends, meaning him coming over on Friday nights and leaving on Sunday. During the week we'd talk on the phone and he'd tell me about this situation that he was in with the whole shelter thing and him not liking it, even though he WAS working but it was only part-time. (He'd quit his full-time job before finding somewhere else to work and that's when his luck turned for the worse). Anyway, fast-forwarding to now...he no longer lives at the shelter due to the fact that I decided to put him up but only for THIS MONTH (JUNE). I made it a point of telling him that by June 30th he has GOT to find a place to move into by July 1st! Well, since then, we've managed to have a really down-to-earth heart-to-heart and he brought something to the forfront that TRULY paralyzed me! He confessed to not being comfortable sleeping with me (not sexually, but actually sleeping with ANYONE in the same bed), because he'd never really done it before and even though he's had girlfriends before he's never felt comfortable actually sleeping with them in the same bed. That was blow #1 ---- Blow #2 came when I asked him was he uncomfortable having sex with me and he sort of admitted that he was only having sex with me as some form of PAYMENT because he felt that was the only way he could truly show his gratitude. THAT JUST TORE ME TO PIECES!!! I mean, that night I cried myself to sleep while he slept in the livingroom on the couch. He's been sleeping there ever since. However, the dynamic between us hasn't really changed. We DON'T live like roommates but we're no longer really LOVERS, either--- BUT, he'll drop little hints and make remarks to the fact that he DOES think of me as MORE than just a FRIEND and although I've become quite concious to NOT make anymore lovey-dovey moves on him, he tends to kiss me on the cheek once in a while and hug me. So, I've decided to follow HIS lead and when he's ready to move back to where we were physically, I'll be ready! (Hell, I'm ready NOW---he was GREAT in bed)!!! Anyway, I digress....Oh, and in the midst of all of you reading this, I also forgot to mention that he's white and I'm black! Now THERE'S a twist, right?! I guess, letting all this out, I have a question--- am I a fool to think that once he gets his situation in order (a place to stay), that he'll still be interested in me? He hasn't done anything to indicate that he's NOT interested in me, but he does seem slightly gun shy when it comes to us having a sex again. However, when we WERE having sex, he was SO attentive and took his time and never rushed. So, I guess you can say, I'm getting mixed signals...should I just continue doing what I'm doing (which is really just following his lead, but still managing to have fun with him) or should I be more firm in letting him know that I'm doing him a favor and that he shouldn't take advantage of me? Okay, after you clear your heads from all this reading, someone let me know, all right? Thanks for the time! :)