Extreme Fears

My daughter is becoming increasingly fearful of storms. She's always been a little afraid of them, but it became much worse after we had a series of 5 tornadoes in two days hit our area in May of last year.

It doesn't help that when she was about 5, a mobile home nearby caught fire and burned to the ground after being struck by lightning. I've explained to her that the risk of this happening to us is extremely small. I've explained how much more at risk mobile homes are and that our house is safer (we don't live in a mobile home) and that we have smoke alarms. But, she's still terrified.

Now, it's at the point where everytime the sky turns dark, or she thinks she hears thunder, she freaks out.. literally. She knows much more than I do about the daily weather forecast. If there's even a 10% chance of rain, she is stuck like glue to my side all day long. And, yesterday, when I was at work, she called me when it began thundering. She wanted me to leave work to pick her up (she was staying with my mother).

It's really at the point where I am starting to think that I should consider taking her to a therapist to help her sort out these fears. I really don't want her to become like my maternal grandmother who was also terrified of storms to an extreme.

It hurts to see her this frightened even at a few drops of rain. :(

Before I start looking for a therapist, I thought I'd post here and see if anyone else has had an experience helping their child deal with an extreme fear. We're not talking about the usual childhood fears. I'm talking about obsessive fears.

i work as a nanny sometimes
i had a five year old who was fearful
her mother was spiritual, and we shared faith, so we talked about God
if the child feels there is some force of unconditional love protecting the family
it works to ease fear

don't make her feel her fear is silly
but let her know there is never anything to be afraid of
because she is love and cared for and watched over by angels or god or whatever
lol- but say it in a way that isn't scary

also, when she is having anxiety, stop and take 5 minutes to focus her mind on something funny or beautiful

Kat

I have no idea how to handle this... I obviously don't have experience... however Have you talked to her doctor???? I'm sure they can help!!!

I had this problem with my youngest when we lived in Kansas - tornado capital #2 (OK being #1 :D ). I purposely sat down with her and watched Storm Stories on the Weather Channel whenever it was on and had to do with rain or tornados. It took her a little bit, she was only four at the time, but the more she watched, the more fascinated with it she became. Soon she realized that this was what weather was all about. Different areas have different types of weather and this was the weather that we had to deal with where we happened to live. Soon she wasn't afraid of storms at all, in fact she could explain to you how they formed and what they did when they hit, and then one day, it just didn't bother her anymore.

whiterose, how old is your daughter? Are you afraid of storms, or expressed any fear about them? Has anyone in your family?

My daughter is 11. She turns 12 next month. I have never been afraid of storms. In fact, I love thunderstorms and so would never have ever acted afraid. Even when we had 5 tornadoes slamming us in two days last year, I never let the kids see me become anxious.

The only other person in my family who has been afraid of storms was my grandmother who died in 1973.

So I have always been perplexed about this fear. And it's not just a fear. This fear consumes her. And that's what really bothers me because I feel helpless and want to help her.

She has an appointment with her pediatrician in a few weeks for a physical. I plan on discussing it with the doctor then to see what advice they have.

Brontophobia Fear of storms - can be limited to fear of thunderstorms, though many suffering from this will also fear rain (Ombrophobia) or even dark clouds and they will anticipate the arrival of storms. Often accompanied with unresolved guilt, trust, or acceptance.

Brontophobia Fear of storms - can be limited to fear of thunderstorms, though many suffering from this will also fear rain (Ombrophobia) or even dark clouds and they will anticipate the arrival of storms. Often accompanied with unresolved guilt, trust, or acceptance.


Yikes I have this... I am petrified of thunder and lightning!!!! PETRIFIED....I used to suffer from unresolved guilt, trust due to the passing of my fiance but I am over those now... that was actually very interesting DB!!

Kat I think the best thing is your Dr.. Hopefully they will help you with this... but for you guys sometimes thunder and lighting storms amount to TOrnado's and that's scary!! I would DIE out there

There's a radical new therapy for this phobia. It consists of strapping the phobic to steel pole in the rain-storm whilst whistling the Canadian national anthem!! :p :D :rolleyes:

Whiterose, my friend's son suffers from the same thing! He's terrified of tornadoes, and even becomes extremely agitated and upset when there is just a really large wind. He is 9, and he watches the weather channel all the time.

I'm quite surprised by this thread... I thought my friend's son was the only one.

My friend has taken him to see a therapist. The therapist helped my friend see that her son's weather-related anxieties have a basis in a fear of abandonment... he's really afraid that the wind/tornado will take his mother away from him. My friend's ex-husband, the child's father, left them when the son was about 2-ish, and the therapist says this causes such high separation-anxiety for the little guy. He's terrified of something happening to his mother.

I don't know if this is in any way similar to your situation... just thought I'd share on the off chance that it might help.

Anyway, my friend has noticed that her son gets more and more anxious about the weather when he is worried about other things in his life. An example: my friend recently started seeing a new man. She would talk about him to her son, before she had introduced them. This caused her son to go into full "weather-watch" mode. Then she introduced her son to the new man, and they got on fine, and he was okay going out in some heavy wind the other day (and he was proud of himself).

PinkCat, you may have hit the nail on the head. Her daddy left us when she was 20 months old. And lately, she has recently been extremely afraid of something happening to me. In fact, she recently asked me if something happened to me, who would she live with... I told her that by law, she would probably go to her father's, but we also discussed the possibility of my son raising her if necessary. But, I reassurred her repeatedly that I don't plan on checking out anytime soon.

I am beginning to wonder if maybe she has some anxieties about Remi moving into our lives that she is too afraid to discuss with me for fear of making me angry. I have asked her many times if she has any worries about it that she wants to talk about and she always says no. But, now that you mention it, maybe she is afraid of something happening to me.

Maybe we'll have a mom/daughter talk tonight. I just find her so much more difficult to open up to me than my son does, ironically. She tends to keep stuff locked inside.

Thanks for all the insight everybody! You're helping me more than you know.