Man who meets the list or passion man?

There's two men I'm dating casually and they're both really nice guys and treat me well. Here' s my dilemma...guy A meets almost everything that I have on my list of desirable qualities like education, common interests, emotional maturity, high self esteem, financially secure, etc but I don't really feel any passion for him. It stinks because he's almost perfect. Guy B I feel a lot of passion for but he meets very few things on my list. The first night I met guy B and he took my hand to dance I felt electricity go through my arm ....like Sleepless in Seattle it was magic. Guy B and I have things to talk about, but he's not as intelligent as I, has been married 3 times, and made some very bad personal decisions. I am just out of an abusive marriage and afraid to make the same mistakes I made with my ex. How do I chose? I'm afraid to wait for someone to come along that is everything because I think I'd be waiting forever.....I don't want to hurt anyone either...what do I do?

K :confused:

Perhaps neither of these gentlemen are right for you.

Married three times along with poor personal decisions? Don't for a minute think your situation with him will turn out any different.

Don't be afraid to wait--there's nothing wrong with being alone.

Do you really have to choose at this point.

It may be neither of these men is "the one", so is it possible to just continue dating casually, and also see who else might come along?

"my momma told me, you better shop around". *smiles*

Frankly hon, I don't think you should have to settle for one or the other. Find a good man who meets most or all of the qualities on your list AND you feel the passion with. It can happen....Don't settle.

Good luck!

How do I chose? I'm afraid to wait for someone to come along that is everything because I think I'd be waiting forever.....I don't want to hurt anyone either...what do I do?

Don't rush, be honest with both of them and most importantly, have fun and enjoy it for what it is. Sounds like at the least you'll have some great friendships out of this.

I agree with the others.

I was married to "everything but passion" and I found myself confusingly sad. And it was sad for him, because he deserved to be with someone who wanted him as badly as his partner.

If you are a person who needs both, then the relationship needs both, in order to be happy.

Don't choose - keep looking.

I'll add a "what they said!"

There are more than 2 guys in the world to choose from...you CAN have both passion and practicality in the same man. I do! Lots of us here do. It is a myth that you can't have both.

Yep...keep looking. :)

Thanks to all of you for your sound advise and personal experiences. It's hard to think clearly when you were in a loveless marriage for so many years and currently in your 40's sexual peak :D. My head is telling me one thing and my body is telling me another. Guess that's why god invented cold showers and rubber bands (some folks here know about the rubber bands...). You gals are so fortunate that you found the guy who is everything to you! I'll keep looking for mine.....

K

It's hard to think clearly when you were in a loveless marriage for so many years and currently in your 40's sexual peak :D.
K

Yeah, that sexual peak thing really screws with your head, doesn't it? ;)

Thanks to all of you for your sound advise and personal experiences. It's hard to think clearly when you were in a loveless marriage for so many years and currently in your 40's sexual peak :D. My head is telling me one thing and my body is telling me another. Guess that's why god invented cold showers and rubber bands (some folks here know about the rubber bands...). You gals are so fortunate that you found the guy who is everything to you! I'll keep looking for mine.....

KWell, if you need to get some, you don't necessarily have to commit to anyone. How about a "friends with benefits" arrangement with the hot one?

If he's OK with it & you can keep looking, why not? :p

I'll add a "what they said!"

There are more than 2 guys in the world to choose from...you CAN have both passion and practicality in the same man. I do! Lots of us here do. It is a myth that you can't have both.

Yep...keep looking. :)

I agree with Goldie and the others here...personally I think you deserve to have both of these aspects in a partner...not just one or the other. ;) :)

Don't allow your libido to influence life-changing decisions.

Keep them both ;) and enjoy each of them because at the moment you get everything you want in both of them. You don't have to choose now...sooner or later you will meet someone with a combination of all the qualities of both these men. I think they fill a emotional and physical gap you have at the moment, but that is just my opinion. Whatever you decide I wish you true happiness and love !
Angelique