Still stuck

Well, She doesn't trust me. She just wants to be friends. I made one comment about waiting to get married. When I first meet her. And this is not thinking of even dating her. I told her I wanted to get married, have children, etc. this was a casual converstion. Then when I said I want to wait she thinks I have change my mind. I havn't. I just wanted to build a strong relationship. And time hopefully does that. How can I get her trust back? I had always planned on marrying her. I always thought there is no one else I would rather marry. I just don't know what to do. Try to be her friend I'm just lieing to myself. Which is very hurtful all in itself. Or just cut all ties to her, which I definally don't want to do. She just doesn't realize how important she had become to me. She felt like I took her for granted. I'm thanking God every day for her. I guess I should have been thanking her. She thinks everthing I do now. I guess is out of desperation. Which, I hate to say it. I am desperate to get her back. But she doesn't realize how big of an eye opener this has been. It would never, and I mean never happen again. Why would I want to go back to a life without her? She is very stubborn. I realized I can't change her heart only God can. She appear out of my life out of the blue. I had really given up hope of really meeting anyone special. She makes things all better, shows me the world, and poof she's gone. This has got to be one cruel joke. She would rather turn me away than give me another chance. She has just as much to loose as I do. It's just hard for me to accept love you one day, gone the next.

I guess you have to take no for an answer. Unfortunately, it takes two to continue a relationship and she's not on board. She might be deluded, she might be wrong, she might be missing the best thing ever, but it's her decision to make.

You were brave and honest and wonderful to tell her how you feel and take a chance. Good for you. Be proud of yourself even as you hurt for a while. We all make a couple of stumbles on the way to finding someone who is right for us and who we are right for too.

There are many people who potentially might be special to you, not just one, even though it feels that way. It's just turning out that another of your soulmates is going to be the one. It's disappointing, but it takes what it takes.

I'm so sorry that you're hurting. Take care of yourself. Remember that you are both loving and lovable and eventually things will clear and you'll be free and ready for whatever happens next.