Personal Responsibility

It is my decision to chose to disregard someone's feelings and I am responsible for how that choice affects them.

Can I please here from others that accept responsibility for their words and the affect that they have without blaming the person that "made" them say them?

It is my decision to chose to disregard someone's feelings and I am responsible for how that choice affects them.

Can I please here from others that accept responsibility for their words and the affect that they have without blaming the person that "made" them say them?

Ya know what Chatter...unfortunately people are cliquish and very mean sometimes...we all make an active choice as to weather or not we will disregard someone's feelings when we reply to them in posts and in real life as well for that matter...and yes, it is OUR reponsiblity to accept that we may have wounded someone when this happens. It's easy to stand around and laugh as long as it's happening to someone else and not you. No one likes being made the butt of a joke...but it happens "all the time"...I'll leave it at that.

If someone blatently attacks me or says something disrespectful or rude to me...you'd better believe I am going to stand up for myself everytime...I don't care whom they know or how many rude or gossipy rumors they want to spread around about me...I say to them..."have a good time...if that's all you've got to do to keep ya busy." :rolleyes:

Often, people just plain don't care if what they are saying may negatively affect another person. I think this comes from being totally emotionally immature ...no other way to explain it.

Also, I think that some people have just learned how to follow the rules a little better than others. It sucks..but that's the way it is...I, for one, am going to grow and continue to prosper in my life...to hell with the naysayers...they are a bunch of caddy bs'ers to begin with...WHO CARES??! So, that's my take on it...aren't ya glad you asked. :D

Often, people just plain don't care if what they are saying may negatively affect another person

Narcissists seem to be like this too and then play the wounded card when they're put in their place.

Personally, I think it's socially irresponsible to not confront narcissists on their B.S....especially in a community like we have here.

Often, people just plain don't care if what they are saying may negatively affect another person

Narcissists seem to be like this too and then play the wounded card when they're put in their place.

Personally, I think it's socially irresponsible to not confront narcissists on their B.S....especially in a community like we have here.


i suddenly feel so close to you :D

hug me

:D

;)

huggy, huggy

It is my decision to chose to disregard someone's feelings and I am responsible for how that choice affects them.

Can I please here from others that accept responsibility for their words and the affect that they have without blaming the person that "made" them say them?

Here, here! I just don't understand people who go through life doing whatever they want and not giving a rat's bu** how it affects those around them.

YOU do have some responsibility in how you make others feel.

Okay, let's add to this discussion the 'modern' psychological instructions that 'I' am not responsible for how 'you' react to what I am doing. BS! Within the context of our friendship/relationship, you ARE responsible for how you treat me. And all of this cr*p about having to soft-peddle everything to everyone these days.

Now, don't get me wrong, me, personally, I believe in delivering the truth in a gentle way whenever possible, or appropriate. But that is my personal choice...it's who I am, most of the time. But when things get down and dirty, and being gentle hasn't put my point across, I'm pretty darn blunt and my tongue can be pretty sharp (although it takes a lot to get me there). And when someone looks me in the face after I've told them that they've crushed me, and can say with a straight face "Gee, I'm sorry that you feel that way", I want to barf on them, or poke their eye out with a pointy stick.

Just where IS any sense of personal responsibility these days?

It is not being taught by society at-large, that's for certain. But you know what? I didn't learn it from MY homelife. It is something that we consciously CHOOSE, every...single...day.

Any thing we do, any role we play,
Even any emotion we feel or any value we respect
Is sustained in being only by
Our own constantly remade decision.
--- Jean-Paul Sartre

Every day, you CHOOSE to be who you ARE. *laugh* And I guess to think otherwise is to forfeit...Personal Responsibility.

Bottom line, IMHO, is that selfish and narcissistic a-holes that think that they can coast through life stomping on other people have a hell of a karmic wake-up call coming. And the more blind they are to this truth, the more of a freakin' shock it's going to be when that wake-up call REALLY comes. Denial is an interesting beast.

**SG jumps down from her tall soapbox**

Anyone for a ****tail? *giggle*

Thatgirl, that's not fair. I LOVE candy corn!

*Star jumps up on soapbox*

Yall are all so totally right on in this thread. I think that not only is personal responsibility disappearing from today's society, but also manners and common courtesy. "It's all in the delivery", folks, and some people round these parts are deliverin a whopper of a punch!

I posted in the double standards rant that I believe that some YM here might be being misunderstood because their communication skills might not be as developed as some of the women here, and that women in general are said to be better communicators. All of the women on this forum appear to be very eloquent and well written, so one can only assume that those who aren't playin nice are fully aware of the fact that they ARE hurtin someones feelings. And that they just don't care.

I think one of the reasons this affects me so much is that I was raised by an old fashioned woman who placed a premium on manners and common courtesy.

Does this mean those of us who were raised with old fashioned manners are all wimps who "turn the other cheek"? No. But it does mean that you don't go out of your way to hurt someone's feelings unnecessarily, that you spend your energy whenever possible makin someone feel GOOD about themselves instead of BAD, and that when you DO have to stick up for yourself, you practice the art of diplomacy. And where I come from, the definition of diplomacy is "tellin someone to go to hell and makin them look forward to the trip"!

*Star braces for barrage of catty comments that are certain to follow*
*Star jumps off soapbox and holds hand out to SG for offerred drink*
OOPS, it's 9:30 am Sunday morning!
*hands drink back to SG and puts on church goin clothes*
*whispers to SG to save her a drink for later*
:D

*agrees completely with Science Goddess and Star's posts*

I LOVE candy corn!

'tis the Season!

:D

What's going on here?

Of course people should be responsible for their own actions and accept the consequences of their actions but not everybody is perceptive enough to understand that sometimes what happens to them actually IS a consequence of their own actions or words.

I think I'm missing the point of this discussion...maybe the beef is in another thread? *reads new posts*

thatgirl....I LOVE candy corn too !!! And the good news is: it's almost candy corn season :D

PLUS....You are in Santa Barbara?!?! I grew up there from age 6 through my first two years of college at SBCC, then on to Long Beach. You lucky girl, you....
Santa Barbara=paradise

It's sooooo nice here...heaven on Earth if you ask me...

For my candy corn loving sisters...

http://www.candyusa.org/Candy/candycorn.asp


:D