Can't seem to move on-Friends or Nothing?

For over a year now I have been in an emotional relationship that probably isn't very healthy. There has never been anything physical besides hugging. I would like there to be more. He shows no interest in any type of physical relationship. He is hung up on waiting for his x-wife, that will never happen. I have a strong relationship with his kids, and he does with mine. We see and talk to each other almost daily. It is really hard for me to move on and date others because I think of him often. When I do start dating others, he shows a lot of interest in me. When ever I have made any advances in him he yanks back and tells me that he has never been interested in me that way. For a long time, I thought it was just in my head. He flirts with me both physically and verbally, calls when he wants to talk. My friends are also good friends with him too and have also witnessed his actions. I keep hanging in there hoping that he will one day see things differently. He has tons of emotional baggage, a recovering alcoholic, recovering dope smoker. All of the things that are not good. Looks wise, I would have never dreampt in a million years that I would have been interested. All that aside, I have strong feelings that I am unable move beyond. Can we ever just be friends, or am I always going to be wanting more? Why has this taken over me and my life? A little about me that may help, I lost my husband a couple of years ago. This was the first relationship (or lack of) since the loss of my husband. I have never been the pursuer in a relationship, not used to rejection. I know that I should just walk away with all my heart, but somethings isn't working correctly. I think I need reassurance. :confused:

hi and welcome.

first off, what type of age gap relationship is this? what's his marital status (you mentioned he has children). i'm guessing you two live close to each other. have you ever TOLD him you want more? if so, what was his reaction?

i know, questions questions lol, but a little more of ya'lls here's and to's would really help the members to help you.

also, i may move your post to the relationship support forum(s) of the site once i know if you're the older woman or the younger woman. get your post out there in the thick of things for more people to see and respond to.

best of luck

Tracy

Well, there are a few things...have you really sat down and told him how you feel and asked him why he keeps leading you on?
And if you have, then I would just move on. I know it sounds harsh, but if hes not interested and he has made that clear you just have to except that.
I would cut him off, all ties, so you don't have to keep obsessing.
Out of sight out of mind.
Just my thoughts though.