Weird encounter at a family function

I was at my OM's god daughter's second birthday. I already knew his parents, brother and sister in law and neice--all very nice, all accept me.

But yesterday at the party, there were a few new people there. I finally met his best friend ( a guy ) who is 38 just like my OM...and he was awesome, so nice to me and his kids were nice to me too. We even all made plans again.

But there sister in law's friends kept looking at me!! Just like hard core staring and it made me feel weird. I even thought I heard her make some sort of comment. So later back at my house, I explained to my OM which two women I thought were looking at me...and he said they probably were lol.

He said one of them is extreme baptist and VERY judgemental of any life that differs from her own...and he said the other, he dated for about a month or two in his 20s...he was going through a rowdy period and ditched her he had no clue she was gonna be there, she is friends with the sister in law and pops up once in a while.

I just find it rude to be so petty, that you need to stare and gossip at a children's birthday party. Whither it was the age gap or the fact that I was with a guy you dated 10 YEARS ago get over it!!

I still think for some reason more older men approve of my relationship with my boyfriend than older women do, just seems that way.

Yeah, probably just seems that way... ;)

Toxic people stew their lives in their own toxic brew. Just remember that. Unhappy people truly repell happy ones. So, smile and know you won't let their negativity get to you. :D The one lady is just jealous... the other, ignorant and myopic and judgemental.

These aren't actually people you would WANT approval from, would you? LOL.

~phos

Yeah, probably just seems that way... ;)

Toxic people stew their lives in their own toxic brew. Just remember that. Unhappy people truly repell happy ones. So, smile and know you won't let their negativity get to you. :D The one lady is just jealous... the other, ignorant and myopic and judgemental.

These aren't actually people you would WANT approval from, would you? LOL.

~phos

I know...I just felt like it wasn't their place to be saying or looking at anything!! And of course, no one formally introduced me to them, so then after not being introduced and seeing them giving me dirty looks, I felt too weird to go up to them and even say hi.


It's bad enough that I still live in a school setting where drama tends to thrive 24/7...I don't want to take that from full grown people with kids. People need to grow up.

Unfortunately girl, you are going to run into this type of crap all your life and it can be for a myriad of reasons.

Some people and I'll have to say women on this one, will be jealous over any woman they think is prettier or more successful than them. Don't let it affect you. The real test is how you deal with it. You can choose to let it run off like water over a duck's back or you can stew in it. Let them take their petty jealousy and ignorant opinions home with them at night to keep them warm. You have your self-esteem, your good heart and your man.

I just find it rude to be so petty, that you need to stare and gossip at a children's birthday party..

agree. dont let it get to you..

I still think for some reason more older men approve of my relationship with my boyfriend than older women do, just seems that way.

i feel that way alot too. the older guys think its 'cool' :rolleyes: all of his older male friends 30 and up.. but im not so sure about the women in his family, especially his sister- shes 42.

agree. dont let it get to you..



i feel that way alot too. the older guys think its 'cool' :rolleyes: all of his older male friends 30 and up.. but im not so sure about the women in his family, especially his sister- shes 42.


yea i always feel like that. obviously the OW on this board can't feel like that b/c they are in their own age gap...but in general, i get some nasty looks.

THEY are the ones with the problem so don't let it get to you! Sounds like you handled the whole thing with class.
thanks i tried. i basically just ignored them and inquired their deal from my boyfriend later back at his house.

Women can be real (w)itches sometimes, especially the insecure ones. I just kill them with kindness!! Smile REAL big and be sugar sweet and boy that gets on their nerves! :D

I still think for some reason more older men approve of my relationship with my boyfriend than older women do, just seems that way.
I agree...my OM's father, brothers, everyone MALE, accepted us. His mother, grandmother, sister, aunts, you name it, any female, didn't accept us.
I'm not sure what it is with men...but sometimes I just love them!

One thing you can't do is control other people's perceptions.

My favorite story about other women, that's caused me to only laugh at anyone making remarks or looking at me askance because I'm with an OM or a YM, took place some years ago...

A man nearly 40 years older than I am took me to a very good restaurant for dinner on my birthday. He got up from the table for a few minutes, and I heard one woman at the next table remark quite loudly (to make sure I heard her) and in a rather scathing "she ought to be ashamed of herself" tone, to the other, "He's old enough to be her father."

I wasn't the least bit offended by the remark or the loudness of it. Nor was I ashamed because I was out to dinner with a man old enough to be my father...

The funny part...

He is my father.

So, after that occasion, if anyone gives me funny looks, or says anything, or if I just feel a bit conspicuous, I just remember that a woman was scandalized by my being out to dinner with my father, and it doesn't bother me anymore.

If people want to be jerks because there's a difference in age between myself and the person I'm with, it's not my problem. It's theirs.

Cheers