Chemistry, is all chemistry sexual??

I always thought of the term "chemistry" when it came to dating of course, not to schooling, was a term used for some sort of like sexual energy between two people.

Well, maybe like 3 weeks back, I was out some place, my friends were over by the bar and I was with an OM friend of mine, having a convo about music (we share an interest in the same genre). Well someone he hadn't seen in maybe 8 years or so, came up to him and was like "Aren't you so and so who used to work at such and such?" and they begin talking and he introduces me. Well, a few minutes into it the Om friend excues himself and I am left with this new guy. So the new guy says to me "So are you and _____ dating? How long have you been together?" And I was like "No, we are not dating. We a just friends. I have a boyfriend and ______ has been married for like 2 years now." And tbe new guy was like "Oh, I'm sorry. I would have thought you two were a couple, you just have such great chemistry" And I mean I thought that was weird, that someone would describe us as having it, bc to me it always was a sexual and attraction thing.

So then this weekend I was talking to someone else who I hadn't seen and they told me they saw me someplace, but didn't come up to me because I was with my boyfriend. And I am like "when did u see me with my boyfriend???" And I asked them where they saw me, and I realized they didn't mean my real boyfriend, they meant the same OM. So I told them, and they were like "Oh, ok, you and _________ just seemed to have great chemistry".

So now I am weirded out by all this. Is it possible to have friendship chemistry? I am devoted to my boyfriend with no intention of cheating on him. My friend is devoted to his wife with no intention of cheating on her. We are not interested in each other. The only thing I can think of is that we have very similar senses of humor and all the same interests so maybe we just come across that way. I am just starting to wonder if people see us how we really are or if a lot of people think we are more than we are. I would never want to portray the act of wanting someone else when I and the other party are both taken, but at the same time, I am not going to give up a friend I enjoy b/c of what other people think. Some of my friends have called me and the OM friend "cute together". I asked them what tht means, they say they can't explain it.

I also thought chemistry always meant sexual chemistry. But some poeple just get along and there could be some sexual chemistry even way back in their minds, but it doesn't mean that it leads to anything more than just enjoying each other's company.

I have some male friends who are not single, we get along great, we find each other attractive and even give each other subtle compliments. Everything about it is so open and simple that it doesn't create any tension whatsoever. Now if one of them whispered to me in a corner "Aline, I find you so attractive" I would feel sorry for his girlfriend.

I think our society defines "chemistry" in much too narrow terms. Have you every met someone (male or female) and you two just hit it off right away? We don't call that chemistry, but isn't the same thing - when people "click" with each other and form relationships (whether romantic or non-romantic)?

I wouldn't worry about what other people think they see between you and your friend. In our sex saturated culture we tend to think with our libidos, which makes it hard for men and women to be genuine friends. So, unless your "chemistry" becomes troublesome for his wife or your boyfriend, just enjoy your friend and don't let other people, however unintentionally, weird you out.

:)

I think our society defines "chemistry" in much too narrow terms. Have you every met someone (male or female) and you two just hit it off right away? We don't call that chemistry, but isn't the same thing - when people "click" with each other and form relationships (whether romantic or non-romantic)?

I wouldn't worry about what other people think they see between you and your friend. In our sex saturated culture we tend to think with our libidos, which makes it hard for men and women to be genuine friends. So, unless your "chemistry" becomes troublesome for his wife or your boyfriend, just enjoy your friend and don't let other people, however unintentionally, weird you out.

:)

Okay good : )

That's sort of how I feel about it too that it is more like a "click". Almost like we share part of the same brain, but not in a sexual way. I agree, I have many male friends who are definately just friends.