Greetings! I'm new here, happy and just need to talk about it!

Hello!

I don't know where to start!

I'm 37 and my boyfriend is 18!!! (we're both a couple months short of birthdays) We've been friends for over a year and working up to dating all that time and we've only officially been a couple for a few months.

He and his family and friends are all good friends with me and my teenage kids. Everyone knows about us and we have support from everyone. As a matter of fact, when he told his mother about us she basically asked him what had taken us so long?!?! And his dad calls me "Michael's Squaw", the same way he refers to his own wife.

I've always been attracted to younger men. He, of course, is too young to have established any kind of patterns yet! :) He was in a committed relationship with someone his own age for 2 years but he said she was "too young" for him. Or at least acted too young. He and I were friends during part of this...

So...we finally allowed ourselves to act on feelings we'd had for a long time. It has been the most incredible experience I've ever had with a man. Ever. We actually fell in love before we even kissed, and then the physical intimacy was just the icing on the cake.

He is actually in his 4th week of boot camp right now...1500 miles away! The crazy thing is that, although I long for him day and night, I don't feel like I'm missing a thing. We're still growing closer every day. So far, I've sent him 14 letters and gotten 7 letters and a rare and precious phone call and his words touch my heart AND my spirit like no one else's ever have.

He just continues to amaze me with the things that are on his mind. He has all the wonderful aspects of youth that we so appreciate, but at the same time, he cares about the things that matter to me even more. Since he got to boot camp he is somehow even more focused on his spirituality and loves to write about it. He also writes about our future and all the dreams that we have in common and his plans for promotion and his military career.

Just amazing...I could go on all day...but I won't. :)

Anyway, this is the first SERIOUS relationship I've had with an age gap like this and I was curious to find out about others' experiences.

I may be crazy, but I'm pretty comfortable with it and more excited than anything else.

Thanks for the forum and the opportunity to ramble and ask questions..I'm sure I'll have some sooner or later!

Wow! Welcome AngelSoft. Sounds like you are very happy with each other. You dont know what a blessing it is to have a supportive group around you! Or maybe you do, I'm sure. Many of us have not had the pleasure. Glad you are here to share with us. And Best Wishes to ya! ;)

Welcome AngelSoft

A happy age gap couple is always fun to have around!

Welcome, AngelSoft!

Ryan (19) and I (38) are in Austin also. He moved here from Maryland. We married last March & have a 6-month-old girl (plus my 16-year-old daughter).

Might be fun to hang out sometime :) Feel free to drop me a PM.

Pam

hi.... well, hmmm..... i guess ya dont know MY story!!! it is very similiar to yours but we are much more far down the road.

met my husband when he was twenty and i was 41 and we were just friends and HE fell in love way before we ever had kissed or had sex. i was not able to wrap my brain around the younger guy thing. BUT! i had allowed myself to get in deeper and deeper in a true friendship, the fact is that i never and would not think of him as a romantic partner because of the age difference, i have a daughter one year younger than he is.

that was then and this is now. biggo changes o.

my friend slash now husband, joined the army also three years ago, the army forced my hand to acknowleging my feelings and i fell hard and fell in love.

he left went to boot camp and i basically told him that he was a free agent, i got the letters also, it was during that time that he held on so flippin tight that i just went along for the ride always giving him his freedom, a year and a half ago we got married....

when my husband was just my friend he used to sometimes tag along with me to church, he was raised jewish and heck if one day he declared his need to be baptised in my faith, he became a Christian and i gotta tell you, he catapolted past me spiritually. he soaked up the bible and Jesus. still does and is my inspiration.

we are not as lucky as you are with his father, his father is a cruel and sad man.

currently he is deployed and is ending a tour in afghanistan at the end of this month. this experience made us. instead of making us weaker, it made us stronger. his main base is in italy where he heads back to soon, i have traveled and done many things i never dreamed possible.

however, this has been a very very lonely life, there is a soldiers wifes poem out there somewhere that reflects our souls and hearts and i wish you to find it.

we got married before deployment and have never lived in the same country, we do speak EVERYDAY and we spend around 600 dollars a month to do so, we have never even thought about the possiblity of someone else out there for either one of us. incidentally, my husband pays the 600 dollars, he has never wavered in his dedication to me. it is not so expensive when they are not deployed so dont fret.

recently his sargeant told him he made rank of sargeant. he is in communications, that does not mean he is not in the field, he is. he has done an amazing job, but i gotta live with the fact that people shoot at my husband and he has had to shoot back, this is not an easy ride.

but i gotta tell ya, i never had any experience with the military and i fell in love with the life, not the lonliness but the people. they are truly an amazing bunch, when adam left he was in many ways a boy, he became more than any man i have ever met or yet to meet. he became my husband, my lover, my hero and my best friend. i am grateful for the army because it defined us, it made us, we became a unbreakable unit because of what we have gone thru.

so, from one soldiers woman to another, i got your back. this is possible if you want it, i have no regrets and would not have given this up for the world.

bless you and welcome to ageless.

kittylane,

Thank you! I can't believe how similar out stories are. I know we're just getting started but I have no doubts that we will be following in your footsteps. Sounds crazy, I know, but it's just something I can feel and I know it will happen. It already is happening.

I am so at peace with him being out there in San Diego and his plan is to be deployed overseas as soon as possible and I'm at peace with that, too. I'm finishing up my degree in marine biology and geographic information systems and plan to get back into conservation work and plan to travel as well. (My own kids, 16 and almost 18 :), will both be on their own in a couple of years and have known for a long time that I'm of a nomadic nature and will be traveling.) Some of our adventures will be apart and some will be together, but nothing will come between us.

I'm not concerned about being lonely. I have so many things going on in my own life and I'm also one of those people who cherishes solitude sometimes. When I'm alone is when I meditate or read or write or work on my art or any one of a million things that make me happy. I'm very active socially but I'm also very independant and I love my time alone!

I'm pretty sure he's going to propose at graduation, and I'm looking forward to almost all the things associated with being the wife of a Marine. We won't get married right away, of course. There's no hurry and no pressure right now. We are both free to follow our hearts...I just know they will always lead us to each other. Of course, sometimes I'll worry about his physical safety and he'll worry about mine. But I won't let that keep me from enjoying this treasure that I have been given.

I'd love to talk with you more, and everyone here! I've got a teen home sick from school and I promised him ice cream!

Thanks all! I'm even more encouraged than ever.

We are such a great team.

what a great story. get into the military wives websites, its alot easier to understand the frustrations, fears, hopes and dreams from others walking the same walk. Good luck to you both.

Angel soft your story is amazing!!! I am so so happy 4 you and inspired as well! And kittylane continues to be an inspiration! Many many blessings!

Welcome! You sound fulfilled and happy both as an individual and as a couple. That's very nice to behold...I think you'll find a lot of support here. Best to ya.

it is great to be in love, i was alot more hesitant with the first year of our relationship, in many ways i questioned if I was the right person for him, being older i recognize character, my husband really has the world by the tail because of who he is and his capabilities, i prayed very sincerely to God to remove him from my life if I were to stand in his way before we became married. he is already getting ready for a promotion and although i am very proud, i am also aware of his abilities and talents and want them promoted to the maximum. this is a responsibility i take seriously.

a soldier in many ways is the most amazing of men. it takes a certain kind of person to put up with that type of relationship, the army comes first. in other forums that i have visited, i understood the frustrations of the wives and girlfriends and it felt good to be among those walking the walk. in some ways we have the best of all possible worlds because we have the romance of loving a hero but hero's have the types of jobs that take them away and in dangerous positions and there is alot of lonliness. enjoying lonliness because you choose it is different than living it when you dont want to.

a soldiers heart is a gift, they are so busy in training that we are put on a shelf and thats ok if you have the type of guy that when he can give you his attention pours out his heart because he realizes the preciousness of his love for you.

i enjoy your enthusiasm, i was much more guarded and defensive in my beginning, four years seemed like a long time, italy sounds romantic and it is, but bear in mind, out of deployment it required that we lived in different countries.

one day you wake up after going thru the patches of why am i alone???? the army proved to me what i would do for love and i amazed myself, i am a better and stronger person from the experience but it was not easy getting here, this in its self was a gift because it gave me back my self respect plus a knowledge of who i am and what i want.

go to the military girlfriend and wives forums..... its good to let your hair down or learn how normal it is to have the emotions and experiences that you are about to go thru. take care.

Glad to have you here, Angelsoft!! Been here two years myself. Great place, great people. Also, I must say how happy I am for you and your man. Its great that his family is so supportive of your relationship.

DanE

Thanks for the welcome EVERYONE!

Yes...I'm been on a Marine forum that has family/wives/girlfriends of guys who are actually in Luke's platoon. So I'll be able to meet up with some of them at his graduation in February. It's just another way to feel closer to him...and feel like a part of what he is doing. We've been talking about how his platoon won marching contest in Initial Drill last Saturday and how they all earned a phone call and about the letters and pics we send! :D

Yes...when he writes he does pour his heart out. And it's not just about us and our future. It's also about his personal journey...how much he loves what he's learning out there, his meditation and how it helps him through the day and how it is changing him for the better to be so much more in touch with his spiritual self.

I'm so happy for him...he's really thriving out there and we're getting to know each other even better through all this writing. In a strange way it sort of forces you to focus on what really matters and get straight to the heart of what you really want each other to know and feel. No matter what ever happens we're really good for each other right now and I plan to just enjoy every minute.

And you're right DanE, keeping in touch with his family is really a blessing! I'm lucky that they know and respect Luke and I enough to open up to us and be happy for us.

Pam - we should definitely hang out!!

kat7 and skatergirl - thanks! I'm so glad I found this place. I've been on the Marine forum for a couple of weeks and I was just sitting here thinking "there's a forum for everything - there must be one for older women dating younger men" so I just searched a bit and here I am. It's nice to read from the man's point of view also.

Of course I had my doubts when our relationship became more than a friendship - but the crazy part is that since he left for boot camp, they've all been melting away.

Sound crazy?