40oz2freedom
12-13-2005, 09:09 PM
Help! I met my om about 3 years ago, were not together. He says we can't be together . He thinks that the feelings that we are both having aren't for ever, and that its only temporary. I can't live like this, he's the only person that i want to be with, and he's the only person that makes me feel the way i want to feel. I think about him all day and night, its kind of sickning. Ive felt like this for well over 2 years now. He always tells me that i will meet someone my age that will make me feel that way. But how can i be involved with anyone else when i have such strong feelings for him. Does he not feel the same way about me? Is it worth waiting for him? Is there another reason that he doesnt want to be with me? I don't know what to do, and have no one to talk about it with, my family and friends dont know. Hes 38 and im 19. :confused:
legallyblonde
12-13-2005, 10:01 PM
Help! I met my om about 3 years ago, were not together. He says we can't be together . He thinks that the feelings that we are both having aren't for ever, and that its only temporary. I can't live like this, he's the only person that i want to be with, and he's the only person that makes me feel the way i want to feel. I think about him all day and night, its kind of sickning. Ive felt like this for well over 2 years now. He always tells me that i will meet someone my age that will make me feel that way. But how can i be involved with anyone else when i have such strong feelings for him. Does he not feel the same way about me? Is it worth waiting for him? Is there another reason that he doesnt want to be with me? I don't know what to do, and have no one to talk about it with, my family and friends dont know. Hes 38 and im 19. :confused:
Test him: Go out with someone your own age and make sure he's there to see you! Are there any jealousy pangs in his eyes? That will tell you all you need to know about him.
But I'm worried about you!!! I think therapy is a good thing right now to help you move forward in life. Welcome to Ageless and best of luck!
Come back and let us know how you are doing.
Hugs
Ali
yellowrose
12-13-2005, 10:41 PM
So you have been seeing him since you were 16? Is he married? I am sorry that you are hurting... :(
kathyw
12-14-2005, 09:54 AM
I think when a guy repeatedly tells you that he doesn't want to be with you and that you should find someone else, it means he doesn't want to be in a relationship with you--for whatever reason. This is true 9 out of 10 times. Occasionally you do get an oddball who secretly does "love" you but is just too scared or skrewed up to admit it, hence he tries to push you away with this kind of hurtful behavior. Either way, it doesn't look good. And no, a guy who tells you he doesn't want you so move on without him is NOT worth waiting for!
I agree...if he "specifically" says this...yes......mixed signals however...are different. When someone says they are leaving you and do not want to be with you anymore..."THEY USUALLY MEAN IT"...just because the other party is not "accepting" the information you are relaying...doesn't mean you've done anything wrong...put a deadline on it...if they are not gone by that time (just like you would in a relationship that seemed to not be moving forward...or stalled)...then you'll have to leave, if they won't...don't blame the person who is "trying" to relay a message...that the other part is just not getting...if someone says "I DON'T WANT YOU...MOVE ON" then do it...but "make" them be honest with you and tell you the reason why...everyone deserves and explanation...not just a lame excuse.
:mad:
40oz2freedom
12-14-2005, 01:27 PM
He tells me he loves me everyday...Hes not married...i guess the only way to find out whats holding him back is to talk to him...thanks guys :)
yellowrose
12-14-2005, 11:59 PM
He tells me he loves me everyday... I am still a little confused. Do you still hang out together or live together? Is he seeing anyone else? It appears that this relationship has gone on quite awhile. Has ihe always been this way? :confused:
I'm concerned about the fact that you said you "think about him day and night"...for two years? Did you use this as an expression, or do you really do that? If you do, it's an obsession, and it's time to get some help!! You need, deserve, and should have a life at age 19 outside/away from him!! Get some help honey. You really need support. I hope you have the means or resources to get it. Best, Kat
