Get depressed everytime I see her...

Which is nearly everyday! I work with her.

I had a lot of hope and stronly believed something would happen between her and I. She's not ready though. She says her kids are her main focus for now, and she thinks it is going to take 2 years until her oldest graduates until she'll be ready for another relationship. I hoped by being her friend first that things just might just evolve, but time is proving other wise.

I personally think she is still getting over her ex-husband. It's been nearly 2 years, but she still sees or talks to him everyday (they have joint custody with their kids). Someone she was in love with, together for 20 years and they he goes and cheats on her. Stupid s*** didn't realize what he had.

Anyway, I've been happy to be her friend, but it's just been depressing lately for whatever reason. I think I'm unintentionally taking it out on her through my moods and actions. Sometimes I'll though a fit that we can't talk or see each other more often and regret in instantly. I get all caught up in the moment, what can I say. :o

I guess if there's a question or point to this thread, it's I don't know how to get away from her with out her feeling or me acting like something is wrong. I basically need my space from her for a little while and want it w/o asking for it.

Like I said, I work with her, so its tuff. She knows my moods very well, when I'm upset, distant, reserved. She automatically gives me my space when I get like this, but I don't want her to feel like she has done something wrong. She hasn't, I just need to rid these feelings for her before they hurt our friendship.

An excellent example of why you shouldn't get your tomatoes where you get your potaoes!

I agree, but it happened. What can I say.

Don't worry man, I've done it myself back in my foolish youth.

Best thing I can say is that it sounds like she is not going to be available to you for the kind of relationship that you want with her. In that situation, you have to just bite down hard and move on. It's the only way!

I would tell her exactly what you feel (do it at a quiet time when you can talk privately) and then maybe keep a little distance from her for at least a while...she should understand. In the meantime, find a healthy distraction...like going out with friends and meeting other girls. Don't sit alone and pine away, that's the worst thing you can do.

I'm not saying it's easy, but from what you are saying, I think this is a pretty good plan to get you through this with the minimum amount of suffering for you and her both.

I feel for you dude...you will get through this one.

This is a difficult situation you have placed yourselves in. So now what to you do? Pretend you have no emotional and physical desires for each other and hope it goes away. That is possible but time is needed and the right turn of events. The events I speak of are a new love interest or other things to keep you so busy socially. This will help you gain a new feeling of contentment. Ask one of your male coworkers or friends to hang out once in awhile. Do some clubbing, outdoor sports or a weekend trip to see something like caves or whatever. Form new relationships with others and nurture them. You may gain a good friend you can confide in if lucky. You have to take steps to break and change the connection you have with this unavailable woman or in the end one of you might have to find a new job else where.
All the best

Yeah! What she said.