Your Y/M's Other Relationships

This may have been discussed before, however, I was wondering if this is true for any of you others out there. My y/m's best friends are all older than him also. And over the years I have noticed this to be a pattern. He just seems to relate better to older people than he is. He always just fits in better. We have friends of all ages, but tend to hang with people closer to my age. So, I was just curious to she if this is a commonality with most y/m who are involved with older women. Do you y/m who tend to gravitate to o/w generally hang out with older male friends also?

ya i can see that being true. that is how i am. i get along with women older than i am a lot better than girls around my age. age doesn't even matter when i'm talking with them. we click we have normal conversations and i just feel more chemistry between us than i do with girls. i know i will keep dating older women.
so it is normal for him to have friends that are women around your age. thats who he feels most comfortable being around and who he wants to be his friends. the age gap probably doesn't even matter to him either.

This may have been discussed before, however, I was wondering if this is true for any of you others out there. My y/m's best friends are all older than him also. And over the years I have noticed this to be a pattern. He just seems to relate better to older people than he is. He always just fits in better. We have friends of all ages, but tend to hang with people closer to my age. So, I was just curious to she if this is a commonality with most y/m who are involved with older women. Do you y/m who tend to gravitate to o/w generally hang out with older male friends also?

Yeah, I think that has been true for my case since being a teenager (that was when I decided I liked OW very much :D) however interestlying enough, being close to 30 now, the 'older' people I like hanging out with, are now coming into my own age range :)

Rather than age, it was the mental maturity I liked :)

Yup - seems that way. We have only known each other for about 8 mos now - but seems all the past experiences he tells me about involve all older people. Now if only his ex was an older woman!! But that is a whole other topic.

Here's a different perspective

I've always had much older friends and have been with older men. When recently I became interested in a a very young man the problem suddenly occured to me when I was about to send him a picture taken at my house during a dinner party with my friends. He called that night and found me having a blast and I thought I'd share the atmosphere with him.

Mais non.

He hangs around people his age which means early 20-s and my picture showed my friends who are all in their 50-s even close to 60-s. I thought "WOW" we're really not in the same world and of course I didn't send the picture.

I really don't think I enjoy hanging around a group of people in their 20-s. That's the case with my young neighbours with whom I get along perfectly. I can handle them individually and it's great. But whenever they invited me to a party at their house, at some point I start to look for the nearest exit.

Well, when I was 18 and started my first 'real' job (where I was for almost 4 years) I worked with people who were just about ALL older than me. My best friends at work were 10-15 years older than me, and I still see some of them occasionally now. And the person I was friendliest with at uni when I started there (until he quit after the first year) was a good few years older than me.

But the majority of my friends that I hang out with now are actually younger than me. A mates gf is actually only going to turn 20 soon, but most are a year or two younger. My gf didn't have a problem getting along with them either.

My gf's friends are all older than me, and I've gotten along fine with them. Her brother and a friend from growing up came to stay on Ney Years Day and we had a blast.

So I don't know really. :confused:

A lot of my friends are much older than I.

I went to community college for 2 years and everyone there was older than me...so that's who I hung out with. I love older people.

But then I went to University and got to hang out with people my own age...and there's nothing wrong with that either!

I'm good with groups of either ages. But my best friend did tell me the other day that I'm an "old soul." lol. *grin*

I think a lot of it just depends on the people and the situation that you're in.

Nadine.

I think we have a wide variety of friends from many different age groups. Perhaps this has to do, in part, with Tim being a bit of an old soul and me having always been ... well... I say "immature" but my physical therapist says I'm "vibrant" (I like her definition better than mine). We're just both comfortable around many age groups. We laugh and say that, together, we're 32, even though (biologically) he's 24 and I'm 40.

Most of my friend's are older than I am. I have just always been drawn to that type of crowd.

I understand what you mean about you being around people his age Aline. When I first was dating my OW, I let a friend use my house for her 23rd birthday. My poor gf was devestated and disgusted by the behavior of the party goers, but understood that I allowed the party because I had made a promise to a friend before I met her. I don't see that particular friend anymore and all of my current parties have older guests. Your YM needs to learn that sooner or later, so send the picture.

Most of my friend's are older than I am. I have just always been drawn to that type of crowd.

I understand what you mean about you being around people his age Aline. When I first was dating my OW, I let a friend use my house for her 23rd birthday. My poor gf was devestated and disgusted by the behavior of the party goers, but understood that I allowed the party because I had made a promise to a friend before I met her. I don't see that particular friend anymore and all of my current parties have older guests. Your YM needs to learn that sooner or later, so send the picture.

LOL, nobody should underestimate the fact that older people could get quite wild also. Whenever I invite friends over I hear the neighbours tell me in a nice way "wow, we heard you all laughing hysterically till 4 in the morning "

But the last party I ever threw in my house where people got so carried away that I found cigarette butts under my bed, red wine spilled on walls and doors, and I had to break the lock on my bathroom door to liberate a couple stuck inside was about 3 years ago. I don't think I can handle that kind of situation anymore.

I really need to go to one of your parties.LMAO

Although my honey has dated OW before, his main group of friends is his age. They went to high school together and are still friends.

People who have filtered into that "clan" since (including me) are both somewhat older (around the 40 mark) and somewhat younger (early 20s). Everyone has at least some of the "mental maturity" mentioned by gtsnapper - there are no longer any real idiots who do stupid things or have ridiculous drama going on, the people they knew who were like that were left behind yearrrs ago.

In general, we get along with anyone with that mental maturity, no matter what the age. So, no, he doesn't have a history of hanging with older people necessarily.

Although my honey has dated OW before, his main group of friends is his age. They went to high school together and are still friends.

People who have filtered into that "clan" since (including me) are both somewhat older (around the 40 mark) and somewhat younger (early 20s). Everyone has at least some of the "mental maturity" mentioned by gtsnapper - there are no longer any real idiots who do stupid things or have ridiculous drama going on, the people they knew who were like that were left behind yearrrs ago.

In general, we get along with anyone with that mental maturity, no matter what the age. So, no, he doesn't have a history of hanging with older people necessarily.

My YM also has dated OW(2) but mostly he hangs out with people his own age or a couple of years older.

Dereck isn't a social type person. He doesn't go out seeking company. Before he met me he had his few buddies that he'd go do 'stuff' with but he said it was because he was so bored. Never liked parties unless the parties are small.... hehe, he gets overwhelmed at my families get-togethers. Sometimes he chooses to stay home.

Besides me his best friend is my son who is close in age and my 3rd brother whom he works with. Big difference in age there so I don't think it really matters to Dereck.

My boyfriend's friends are the same age, give or take two years, as him. He is not a very sociable person. Most of my friends are between 16 to 60, that I see on any regular basis. Those whom I spend the most time with are my own age or a few years younger, just due to availability. I don't really have a general preference of an age bracket for friends.

hmmm.... I think Joel only have had one real friend that was older than him the rest have been a couple of years younger. Joel isn't very social of him but he has always had friends... but I think he is like me, he like a few very good friends insted of many. He has one friend that he has been talking to over the internet (and never IRL) for 5 years, he is two years younger than him... I have also come to know him and adopted him as my friend as well... but even though he is only 18 he is really mature... so I guess it all comes down to the maturity level and not to the age...

I have two friends that are younger than me, that I actually make and effort to hang out with. All my other friends are between 3-35 years older than me. One is 57 years older than me! My fiance really has the exact same circle of friends. We are both very social, within said circle, but have no time or desire to expand it.