He is 11 years younger than me....

I am living with my boyfriend (A) of 5 years now with my 2 daughters from my previous marriage. They are close to him. He (A) is a good man to them. However to me he is everything but 100% faithful.
Tell me, I have been taking care of him and my children and everything else a good housewife does. I did not go out with my friends. Everywhere I went, whatever I did was with him otherwise it is with the children.
He has 2 sons from his marriage and with mine, the four was often with us. He is still going through the "divorce" and this year it is the 6th year........
I have always been faithful to him. I respect him, love him, adore him.
Then lately I found out that he has been seeing some women occassionally for some good times.
I feel devastated when I spoke to him and found out. Problem is he cannot lie to me because he is very bad at controlling his body language. I know this man really well.
Anyway, 1 month ago I met a man (B), 11 years younger than me. We started talking on the phone, had coffee and then one thing leads to another, we started to be intimate.. He (B) knows my live-in boyfriend and has met a few times....We (B) both love each other's company and he has been the best thing that has happened to me so far this one and a half year I have been unhappy in my relationship (with A).
We (B) made love a few times now and each time it gets better. We have intense feeling for each other. We send each other SMSs few times each day. Saying how much we miss each other and all.
In a few months ,he (B) has to go back to his country to finish his final year in the school but mentioned that he wants to come back when it is done. I am going to miss him terribly.
Another problem is, my live-in boyfriend still loves me very much and wants to make love to me everyday but honestly I cannot do it anymore. Every second I am thinking of this other person. I feel like telling him (A) the truth.... I cannot stand this. It is difficult. Please tell me what I should do....

Okay, I gotta ask it:

Why are you still with A at all? If he is cheating on you, why are you still with him?

Do you plan to stay with him? If not, get out . . . send him on his way.

Problem solved.

Oh what a tangled web we weave when we practice to deceive......

Oh what a tangled web we weave when we practice to deceive......

Yep, you said it! Two wrongs don't make a right!

Okay, I gotta ask it:

Why are you still with A at all? If he is cheating on you, why are you still with him?

Do you plan to stay with him? If not, get out . . . send him on his way.

Problem solved.

Pretty much, this is it. I don't think that B has much to do with the big picture at all. There is no age gap issue here at all, as far as I can see.

If you plan on staying with A, how happy do you think the two of you will be with each other out, sleeping with other people?

If you want to tell A the truth, then go ahead. Be prepared for him to up and leave you. Chances are that if you 'forgave' his cheating, he's not expecting that you've gone out and done the same.

There's the possibility that this could be a wake-up call for you both, but that's just one of various scenarios coming clean could lead to.

Sounds like you've been avoiding making any decisions about your relationship and future with A. Maybe now is the time to take a good long close look.

Lastly, he's going into the 6th year of a divorce? Is this what you want for your future? Sounds like he's hanging onto some kind of lifeline for some reason.

Good luck, Esme.

Oh what a tangled web we weave when we practice to deceive......

So true and as such we claim to view ourselves as responsible adults...what a great example to teach those kids in the house, that we are more govern my our physical impulses then our minds.

And then to do it with someone your b/f knows...ewwww...there's no self respect in any of the adults in this case. Just remember that 52% of second relationship end as painful as the first when we first start out any new relationship on such a deceitful fashion. Its call karma and while things are horny and intense right now there's no trust because of the way you both started this relationship...after all B knows you can cheat just as easily as A so there's no cause to believe in you and boinking someone is not the same as believing that that person has any emotional integrity.

Lose the loser, A, get yourself to a place of truth and honour and then work from there and for goodness sake, you have 2 daughters...think and think and think again before you bring in another man into their lives. The percentage of kids who get molested IS by someone they know, be very careful.

Paris

Any man who cheats does not love you 100%. Any man who cheats on his woman is not being a good father to their children. Stop making excuses for your boyfriend. He is not a good man.

Get rid of the boyfriend. Then, get yourself and your children sorted out. THEN, and only then, think about starting a new romance.

B sounds like he is feeding you what you want to hear so he can get what he wants now. He probably has no intention of returning to this country.

You are a willing victim and both these men are taking advantage of that. You need to build up your self-esteem. You are the only one who can do that and you need to do it without a man in the picture.

I think you need to be true to yourself. Mr. A seems to be taking advantage of the situation at your expense. On the other hand, I agree with Patricia that it hard to to be 100% sure of B's intentions. However, from what you have said, he seems to be genuine. I would have a long talk with B so that you can discover what his true intentions are and if you really see a future there, to pursue it. To me, A has a lot of issues and I'm not cool with what he's doing to you.