Need a Little Support

I'm dating a 22 year old soon to be his wife. I met him at a time in my life where I just wanted to be alone. I had dated a few knuckle heads and finally had decided enough is enough. Well I met this guy through a friend. We simply just talked on the phone a lot and had frequent bible studies. Our conversations were really good and I was shocked. I mean shocked because he was 14 years younger than me and was carrying on a conversation that many men my age couldn't. He was gentle, concerned and caring about me and my children. Finally after talking to him a month he asked me to be his lady. I was scared at first because I feared what people would say and then I have a teenager myself. Anyway I accepted because my heart said do it. Our relationship is beautiful now, however, we encounter ppl who can't believe we are together because of love. They think it is a sexual thing and it really isn't. We both have experienced it with one another but really don't feel good about doing it and not being married so the sex thing we don't talk about much because of that. His mother asked me what did I want with her son and I felt like a actress from Stella and I was like what. Anyway I just want to know if anyone out there has experienced what I'm going through and what should I do. My guy also wants children and because I love him so much I'm willing to do it. What do you think about that? Please give me some advice. Thanks.

I'm dating a 22 year old soon to be his wife. I met him at a time in my life where I just wanted to be alone. I had dated a few knuckle heads and finally had decided enough is enough. Well I met this guy through a friend. We simply just talked on the phone a lot and had frequent bible studies. Our conversations were really good and I was shocked. I mean shocked because he was 14 years younger than me and was carrying on a conversation that many men my age couldn't. He was gentle, concerned and caring about me and my children. Finally after talking to him a month he asked me to be his lady. I was scared at first because I feared what people would say and then I have a teenager myself. Anyway I accepted because my heart said do it. Our relationship is beautiful now, however, we encounter ppl who can't believe we are together because of love. They think it is a sexual thing and it really isn't. We both have experienced it with one another but really don't feel good about doing it and not being married so the sex thing we don't talk about much because of that. His mother asked me what did I want with her son and I felt like a actress from Stella and I was like what. Anyway I just want to know if anyone out there has experienced what I'm going through and what should I do. My guy also wants children and because I love him so much I'm willing to do it. What do you think about that? Please give me some advice. Thanks.

There is nothing to be gained from listening to others criticisms if their criticisms are based solely on your age difference. If they have other things to say about his character or anything like that then it is worth giving it some consideration however there is nothing wrong at all in just having an age gap. If people think you are susceptible to their criticisms about it they will often really let you have it. Just because something is not a common combination doesn't meant it won't work!

I'm sorry to hear about the comments made by his mother, I had the same kind of thing thrown at me. My husband (13 years younger than me) was repeatedly asked by Very Serious People, (well meaning friends of his mom) "what are her real reasons for wanting a younger man" etc.. etc.. well I didn't pick him because he was a younger man, that was no more a factor in the attraction than his foot size. Eventually these comments will stop when it is too late in their eyes to sway either of you.

I had a child with my husband and one on the way, I am older than you :) He had no children and I went into the relationship saying all along that we would have at least one if we could. That can be a serious issue in any relationship where one person has already had children and the other has not, even if they are the same age.

Things get better after you get married as far as what people say. I think his mom was still hoping he would come to his senses and leave me right up until we announced we were having a baby. She can't very well be a good christian woman and keep wishing for it now. Everyone else acts as though they were happy about it all along which is quite gaggifying but oh well.

Please treat your relationship as you would any other and don't worry about the age difference. Let other people worry about it, LOL

Thanks for your inspirational message. Me and my soon to be husband we're just talking to wee hours this morning about how ppl judge our relationship and how they truly don't understand we are in love. I said the younger girls are going to be like how she get him when I always wanted him and he was saying the older guys going to be like why not me. We just laughed. My guy's mother is a christian as well and that is what is making her look at our situation differently. See at first she thought I was younger because I look it then when she found out I think she almost fainted. I was prepared for this though somewhat. I know she thought at first what does this woman want with my baby and is she going to hurt him. Well, heck I was thinking the same thing about him and had my mother still been alive she'd probably be giving him the 4/11. Anyway she loves me now. She sees my heart instead of my age. I still think she finds it hard to believe that her baby wants an older woman. Then she has to realize his siblings are my age and he has an old soul. Anyway I can't wait to our years together. We plan to be married this August and I know in my heart, mind and soul he is my soulmate and he constanting tell me that he knows I'm the one. You know our relationship was drawn together by God. All those bible studies together made us connect and I thank God everyday for my real man. Any man that can walk into a relationship at his age and accept my children, me and whatever us I may have that is somewhat of baggage and want to be a support in my book is a REAL MAN. So again thanks for you note and I'm happy for you and you little one here and on the way. Many blessings to you, your husband and family. Hey let's give them all something good to talk about