Trying this out

i found this site because i guess i'm insecure about my OW/YM relationship. we've been together for a year and a half, i'm 39, he's about to turn 31. essentially, the relationship is great, except for the distance. we started out nearby, but he has since moved to another state to go to school briefly, write some certification exams, and prepare to move to NYC. he just spent about 6 weeks living with me while he's been studying for and writing some of his certification exams so that we could have some significant time together. we got back from a week in jamaica about a week and a half ago, first big vacation together. now he's gone again, and i love him more. one more exam to write, today, then he'll start looking for work and a place to live in NYC.

NYC. NYC. this man is amazing. he's handsome, sexy, smart, and he tells me that he loves me. sometimes a lot, and he apologizes for this from time to time. i love him too. NYC. beautiful younger women, exciting things to do. i'm not there. we haven't discussed where this relationship is going, there's too much upheaval in his life right now for that to be a fair discussion. but, i worry. he's not ready for children, he doesn't know right now if he will or won't ever want children. i'll be 40 in november. children are not a top priority for me. but, for him, who knows, down the road when he's ready.

i'm scared.

Your relationship sounds wonderful, he sounds like a great guy. The kids thing scares me everyday as well. I am in New England too and drive by NYC on my way to see my BF once a week.. he's in NJ.. its a 360 trip one way, but somehow we manage, I'm sure you will find a way. Is there something stopping you from moving into the city as well?

Welcome!

hi malani. i don't know what the distance is for me, but i imagine it's something like you. it IS a good relationship. i guess time will tell if it can manage the distance. i haven't thought about moving to the city. we haven't talked about. i'm just now applying for my green card so i have to stay in my job until it comes through. don't know how long that will take. so, moving to the city really isn't on the table right now for me. i guess i'll just keep doing it until i can't anymore, if that happens. i do know one thing though. he isn't ready to settle down, even though he loves me. i'm not sure what to do with that.

thanks for reading.