When is a "younger man" too old?

I recently joined ageless and have noticed that many of the users are in relationships with chaps who are maybe a decade younger than myself. Indeed some of the older women are younger than me. So what are the upper age limits for women who llike the younger man. Is there an optimum age for the younger man? Maybe this is a slightly ridiculous question but I would be interested in nay replies all the same.

Ed : a youthful 36!

I think younger is relative. I'm 33 and my boyfriend is 20, but when he's 36 I won't be trading him in for a younger guy!

I'm not really sure I understand your question. Are you asking where all the older women over age 40 are?

LOL, your question makes me smile because I've been thinking about this also.

I'm 41 and the youngest lover I've ever had was 6 years younger. Then I became very attracted to a 23 year-old. We ended up becoming best friends and I'm glad it didn't go any further, I don't think I could have handled the age gap. The friendship is absolutely precious even though he's a pain in the arse most of the time, but I simply adore him.

Many women here are in relationships with big age gaps and it's all going well, but that's just not for me. On either side actually. I have always dated older men, but now that I'm in my 40-s, I'm absolutelt NOT attracted to older men, go figure :rolleyes: .

I'll be very fussy and selective and say that for me the perfect age would be between 35 and 42. I'm "sort of" dating a 36 year-old viking :D

It is not about the "age" OF a person. It is about who they are AS a PERSON, that counts. Each person must decide for THEMSELVES what might be too young or too old (within legal limits).

Most of us here, did not go out looking for a dates in certain age bracket. We just got to know a guy and fell in love, unlike the posts on other dating sites where men who are 55, want women between 18 & 35. :rolleyes:

for example if she is 46 and he is 36.....
or she is 50 and he is 36...like that.

It is not about the "age" OF a person. It is about who they are AS a PERSON, that counts. Each person must decide for THEMSELVES what might be too young or too old (within legal limits).

Most of us here, did not go out looking for a dates in certain age bracket. We just got to know a guy and fell in love, unlike the posts on other dating sites where men who are 55, want women between 18 & 35. :rolleyes:

Yes Yellowrose, you're absolutely right and I feel a bit shallow when I specify an age bracket. The problem is, I am simply not attracted to older men, but on the other hand, even though much younger men stir my animal instincts, I just know that I cannot handle the age-gap. Therefore to me a man under 35 is too young basically. I think I reversed Ed's question. oooops :p

How funny that you ask this, Ed... because I just read an email from a dear friend whom I'm pretty sure if he lived near me (we are two states away) we would explore a dating/ relationship as an option (the distance and the fact that we are both dating others right now prevents that). Anyway, it's his birthday tomorrow and he said playfully, "I'll be 34! That probably means I'm close to aging-out with you, Karen."

Nonsense. The beauty about aging is that we all do it -at the same time!....so his age will always remain relative to mine as a younger man. It is more the qualities and view of the world developed during the era in which he and other men in the 25-35 year age range were raised that are attractive to me. I feel like I have much more in common with men under about 40 (I'm 49+). So, it's not that Im' attracted to 25 year olds, or 32 year olds....for me it's more of an age-range for men that I've had most success feeling compatable with. And they continue to get older just as I do :) . Does that make sense?

For me, you are a younger man...for ladies here in their early 30's, you aren't...but it's not the number so much as it is the soul and heart of the man. Heck, I have never met one who was available (and my friends will tell you I really tried!), but if I found a 50 year old guy who was very fit and attractive (as I work hard to be), had as much energy, matched in libido, had an unrestrained playful spirit, educated and artistic, was not jaded or focused on his portfolio but more on developing a deep intimate friendship...and wasn't intimidated by my strength and success as a woman (as I've found most younger men not to be), I would sign up immediately!

Sorry to bump here a little...

Special K-I feel the same way about the 30ish men. What is it about that age group that is more accepting, more outgoing, more family oriented instead of the men with the portfolio's. Because I've always thought of the 30's as the time when most men are climbing the ladder so to speak. But..generally that is not so true in that age bracket. They seem to strike a better balance between play and work. Where as the men fom say 42-50 still seem to be interested more in the almighty dollar. Don't have time for family due to over work and more selfish pursuits. I hope I'm not generalizing here but I am 50 and so a lot of my friends are around this age. This has just been an observation. Now that these men are reaching 50, they've just become ole' poops. let's hope this next age bracket doesn't shift that way also, OR maybe by the time we're nearing our 60's we'll be hoping for it. LOL. Otherwise, we may be ditching them for VYM!!! :eek:

Of course, this is all in jest.

Hi, Ed. I'm also 36 and have noticed as well that I'm old in comparison to a lot of the YM who are on the boards, or who are dating OW members. Heck, we're older than a considerable number of the OW. But I think the 30s are a very versatile age as far as dating goes. We're far enough into adulthood that we can easily ask out, date, enter into relationships with, and love a very wide chunk of the female population without the age gaps becoming perhaps TOO big (if there is such a thing). For instance, I'm attracted to a woman of 23 and would ask her out except for the fact that she has her heart set on moving far away. Looking upward, two years ago I was 34 and in a relationship with a woman of 64.

Let's see.....

Ed=36 ........Gypsy=41

still plenty young to me! ;) lol

All joking aside dear, 35-40 is what I normally prefer. But I had it bad for a 49yr old a while back. So age is not important if it feels right.

LaDave and others have said it much better than I.
I just had to be a smarty pants on the way to bed. :D

I agree with what most said here, esp. what SpecialK wrote about men who are in their 30's for the most part still having that playful energetic appeal which defintely "appeals" to me, and who are also not all wrapped up in money like Sara stated. Like others have said as well, you would be a much younger man for a woman who was my age (in her 50's) than others, and it would stay that way as we both do age and nothing can stop it, but even though that would happen, the "qualities" that you possess would more than likely not change, and that is where the attraction lies. Does that make sense? However, with that said, I am not like most who just happened to "fall" for someone who was younger at this stage in my life, as for me younger men are a preference as we tend to be compatible on so many levels it sometimes scares me! And I do not consider myself shallow at all! ;) Anyway, I hope the members here have helped you in discovering the answer for which you were seeking!

PS LADave.... you with a 23 year old??? To me, that would have been a first! :eek: :D

Age isn't that important. I used to think it was, but life has taught me otherwise. I've seen immaturity among older men and some younger men stand out as extremely mature. There do seem to be more very young men searching for olderwomen, than say, men in their 30's. It may be a reflection of the times we live in. While not yet mainstream, it is becoming more common and less shocking. I believe the ym/ow thing has always existed, but in times past maybe kept hidden.

To answer your question, it depends on the individuals involved. For me, the question is, when is a ym too young? And you're just about the limit for me. If I were 60, you'd be too young.

Live it up, Ed! You're at a good age - you can appeal to women from 20 to 60. ;)

I've read with interest the replies to my question which was partly asked in jest. You have all given me plenty to think about! A lot of it confirms my own opinion that it's the compatibility of the individuals rather than their ages which is the important thing.
Thanks for taking the time to post such considered replies,
Ed ;)

Ed well I'm 36 now and I consider myself young....I'm still learning; I could still climb a mountain (if I could be bothered:); my skin is the same as has been since I was 25, and I feel thats theres a lot to look forward to in life. Hey, you're supposed to wait until 50 before you have a mid-life crisis, so live it up!

I don't think age plays such an important part. Its about liking a person and his/her mentality. At the most, age can be a yardstick.

ow & ym should enjoy each other. thats all what matters

cheers

Agreed! I'm a 40 year old whose usually dated men 7 years younger to 7 years older than I am... until I met my husband who is 15.5 years younger!

I will say this, though -- we looked for a forum such as this one because our age gap is significant. If I was dating or married to someone within the aforementioned "zone," I probably wouldn't be a member of this site because I doubt I'd have ever searched for a forum designed for couples in 'age gap' relationships!

I like my young man to be between 18 and 24. I prefer virgins. Any man past 24 is no longer iin his sexual prime and he bores me. I love the young man I am with now. I have benn with him for 2 months and yes, I already asked him to marry. He said, "he is not ready."....What did I expect he is 21....lol but the sex is great and his innocent sincerity is a real turn on. My man is in college and he is military. Try to find a mature intelligent young man the sex is better!

Here's my yahoo group if you are interested in joining:

This group is for women who are seriously dating young men. I am 38 and my lover is 21 we love each other but sometimes I need support from women who are also dating young men. I would also like to hear from young men who are seeking to seriously date older women. This is a space for women to get together and share our common experiences while seeking advice when it comes to loving dating and marrying younger men.
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/ccrystal06
ccrystal06@yahoogroups.com

How long did you date your husband before you married him? Did you as him to marry you or did hhe as you to marry him?

Here's my yahoo group if you are interested in joining:

This group is for women who are seriously dating young men. I am 38 and my lover is 21 we love each other but sometimes I need support from women who are also dating young men. I would also like to hear from young men who are seeking to seriously date older women. This is a space for women to get together and share our common experiences while seeking advice when it comes to loving dating and marrying younger men.

http://groups.yahoo.com/group/ccrystal06
ccrystal06@yahoogroups.com

Do you mean me? If so, we knew each other just a little less than two years (1.5 years of dating). My husband was 21 when we met, 22 when we started dating and 23 when we got married. Technically, he asked me to marry him (we were talking with Joe and Peachy just after he'd bought the ring and Peachy made him get down on one knee to 'do it properly!' :D ) but we both knew it was right so it wasn't like one of us was ready for marriage and the other needed to be convinced...

Another year has gone by and we are more in love than we ever dreamed possible.

I like my young man to be between 18 and 24. I prefer virgins. Any man past 24 is no longer iin his sexual prime and he bores me.

I love the young man I am with now. I have benn with him for 2 months and yes, I already asked him to marry. He said, "he is not ready."....What did I expect he is 21....lol

Umm...so you were planning to stay married only until he was 24?

I don't think there's a specific expiration date for all men's prime. I always thought it was individual, go figure. I don't seem to be having any trouble with the 29-year-old...

For most of us here anyway, it's not all about sex. Sex is only a part of a rich relationship for most of us. Have fun..

I am 34 my fiance is 24, we have been together for almost 2 years engaged a year. We have known each other for 10 years, his family is very close to my family.
Never in a million years would I have thought we would have dated, non the less fallen in love or gotten married.

I have always been young for my age, physical appearance and mentally, I still like to have fun. We started hanging out when my ex and I seperated, I ended up a single mom, with no friends after a 6 yr dead end live in relationship. He had ended his first "serious" relationship.

We just went out for drinks and coffee, with ourselves and mutual friends and from talking we just ended up together, and it is wonderful. I dated on and off tried guys my age, but they bored me to no end. My ex was 5yrs younger then me.

Our relationship is wonderful I get uneasy with my body and his friends at times, but we all get along famously, in fact I am the favorite girlfriend because he can have a life without all the needy, whining that most younger insecure women still feel, because I have a job, a life, and a 5 yr old that keeps me busy, but he loves me for me, and that it what a relationship is.

I would love him if he was 40, because of who he is, not how old he is. I think we all ended up in these relationships because we fell for the person, not neccessarily their age. Its all how old you feel and act, and where your personality and self lead you...

I recently joined ageless and have noticed that many of the users are in relationships with chaps who are maybe a decade younger than myself. Indeed some of the older women are younger than me. So what are the upper age limits for women who llike the younger man. Is there an optimum age for the younger man? Maybe this is a slightly ridiculous question but I would be interested in nay replies all the same.

Ed : a youthful 36!'

When is a younger man too old? When he is older than the older woman that he forms a relationship with, then she becomes the younger woman and he becomes the older man!

For most of us here anyway, it's not all about sex. Sex is only a part of a rich relationship for most of us. Have fun..

I totally agree. I didnt 'choose' my ex-YM (28) because of his age. Or because of the sex.

I'm 47, and i'd date just about any age men, altho i'm not usually sexually attracted to someone very much older than me, so far anyway! Its funny because when i was young, i was sexually attracted to OLDER guys...

I joined the AgeMatch site, and where they ask for ages youre interested in, i first put something like '18-56.' Then i thought...MAN, i better narrow it down...lol.

I choose someone by their personality, and the attraction. I have found that i have a great time with younger guys, so i'd say now that that's what i'd 'prefer,' but i was recently dating a 50-yr-old.