Will someone help me out..?

Hello, I'm a 21 year old kid. I had a problem years ago with an older woman. But thats over now and now I have another problem with a girl my own age. After my last relationship fell apart she was there to help me pick up the pieces. We started talking outside of work for hours on end. We started IMing each other everyday, then it got to phone talking. She would message me out of the blue to see how my day was going. Started calling me at work everyday telling me to call ehr when I get off. I had such a greta time with her. She persued me totally. She came over to my house last thursday to help me learn how to cook and she even rearranged my kitchen and cleaned up for me.

I made her a cute little thank you card. Ive done nothing wrong to her and have not been aggressive at all in talking to her. The problem is she has this BF that shes been hinting to me that shes getting rid of. He has been insanley jealous of the two of us. She told me this. Today she started ignoring me and acting like Im not there. She laughed later and told me that she was only messing with me. She kept that up all day long. She told me that she'd talk to me online. Well she signs in and out in the course of a minute without saying a word. I miss the hell out of her. I now think that she was hoping for me to say something.

We had alot of fun on Thursday and I tho8ght things were going along great. Now shes avoiding me like I have some disease. We played and laughed and teased each other and I want to know what i did to make her ignore me. I miss her so much right now and am scared that now she wont call me anymore or talk to me. What can I do? Should I call her? Even as a friend, I just miss having her around. I dont care if we are just friends or something more down the road. I just want her around. Shes been the best. I feel I havent shown her that enough and I dont know what to do.? If anyone needs more information go and ask but please help this sad lonely guy out?:(

I think it must have something to do with the boyfriend. Even if she intends to break it off, his jeolously may be playing a role here. I think in your shoes I would ask her when she wants to do another Thursday night thing. Remind her that you had a lot of fun! See what happens.

If being angry because his girlfriend spent an evening doing "couple" things with another man qualifies one as "insane," someone had better put me in a rubber jacket -- I'd be incredibly ticked, too!

Regardless of your circumstances, I wouldn't put the cart before the horse. She has a boyfriend and really shouldn't be giving you the signals she's been giving you. If she's truly interested then let her take care of her current situation without having you as an influence.

We spent so much time together that I cant handle this now. Its not fair to me to spend all that time with me and then just dont talk to me at all. I mean, I miss my friend because shes the only one I got. Now Im all alone and I hate that feeling.:( I mean people do that to me all the time, spend alot of time with me then just totally backoff and disapear. I mean I havent crossed any lines with her at all so why is she mad at me? i've done nothing more than be a best friend to her, could she feel like it's more than that? We click too well to not just talk. Im mean let her sort out this crap with her boyfriend, I don't want to be involved with them breaking up, because I dont want to be on the recieveing end of this guy's fury. Last time the 3 of us were together, all she did was talk about me and her and the funny things we do. He's a nice enough guy. I don't see her being interested in me. Hell, I'm not that great of a guy myself. He can buy her anything she wants and I don't have any money. I don't know if Im that good looking either, but I can make her laugh like hell. Latley shes been trying to resist laughing. I don't get it? Can't two people just have a good time? Plus even if she has a boyfriend, what she cant have hang with any other guys as friends? Because, as long as shes in a relationship, I wouldnt dare cross that line because I respect her relationship. I don't like the cold shoulder. I dont deserve to be treated that way when all I've done is be nice to her.

Even as a friend, I just miss having her around. I dont care if we are just friends or something more down the road. I just want her around.

Hey striker read your posts.
It seems to me that you are just missing her company as a friend and that you're not romantically interested in her.
Maybe it's not fair to her to keep her around so that you won't be lonely and have to feel the feelings of your break up when somewhere inside of her she might be hoping for more from you. I'm not saying that this is the case; I'm just making you aware of her possible feelings so that you don't unknowingly hurt her.
BUT, it sounds to me like she was trying to be a good friend to you by helping you through your issues...
You know sometimes friends need their space and we have to learn to take care of ourselves emotionally. The fact that there's a boyfriend is something to respect and take into consideration as well.
I could also say that in part it was not fair for her to spend time with you and contribute to your becoming attached to her if she knew she had a boyfriend.
In any case, you have to go back to square one and get back into your life as if she never existed. It’s so true that people come and people go in our lives and we must learn to be happy on our own. I strongly recommend getting involved in sports and things that you love during this time

where have you been skater? we have not heard much from you these days, i meant to send out an SOS lately? whats doin? sorry to not stick with topic :o .

ditto, on what everyone else said though, i could understand why her boyfriend would be upset.

where have you been skater? we have not heard much from you these days, i meant to send out an SOS lately? whats doin? sorry to not stick with topic :o .


missed you too and all of you!!! ((hugs))

Dump her. She isn't treating you with any respect.

Don't be a wimp and put up with that kind of abuse, there are plenty of other girls out there that will treat you better than that.

You are obsessing over this chick. That is NEVER a good thing to do.

If someone treats you with disrespect, dump them and forget them.

PS: If you dump her, don't surprised if she comes running back to you. If you still like her that much, go for it at that point. But make sure you start it out on a new course where you make it clear to her that she better treat you with respect or it's over for good.

If you can pull this off, she's yours and you'll have the best sex of your life. ;)

You are obsessing over this chick. That is NEVER a good thing to do.

I agree...

I miss my friend because shes the only one I got. This isn't the best of reasons to miss someone. You talk about other people treating you this way as well. Have any of them given you a clue as to why they end up doing this to you?

The gal sounds like a game player that likes the attention. You are right, she should not have treated you or HER BOYFRIEND this way. I think you are better off without her.

Are you in any organizations where you can meet and become a part of the group? This would be one way to not keep putting all your eggs in ONE BASKET and being lonely.

If this does keep happening I would recommend talking with a therapist. I think it would really help to get you on the right track.

I'm just not the type that has ever had a large circle of friends. My problem is that I didnt initiate any of this, it was all her that called me, wrote me, ect.. Then after she gets me attached to her, she vanishes with no explanation. Now its been 4 days with no contact at all, when she didnt used to go more than 4 hours without at least sending me a text message. I dont know, Im trying not to assume the worst, but it's hard considering my track record. One of my friends thinks shes doing this to try and attract me more, make me chase her if you will, but that sounds like a game, which I don't like, I won't chase a girl. That just makes me look stupid. So I'm just waiting it out.

Usually, this is what happens, some takes in intrest in me, I take an intrest back, they back off, I take more interest, they take less. I'm sick of this.

UPDATE: She signed on to AIM and is ignoring me, I don't know. I at least am owed an explanation..:(

UPDATE: She signed on to AIM and is ignoring me, I don't know. I at least am owed an explanation..:(

Then ask her for one . . . have you considered the fact that she may be playing a game with her boyfriend and not you? She may be using you to make him jealous.

Maybe you should think about giving an ow another try. We, at least me, try not to play those kind of games. I find them exhausting. I agree with the other posts, you do seem a bit obsessed with her. My son finds it hard to make friends so i feel sorry for you that you thought you had made a new one and now this but, i say this again, younger girls can be kind of pyscho in my book.

Well, she writes me saying that I need to chill and that shes just been busy. Whatever. Thats an explanation at least wheteher or not its the truth. Shes never been too busy before to talk to me. But now its definatley done because she now knows that Im insecure. I tried to hide that insecurity, but now that its out there she might not talk to me again because she hates clingly people. I normally dont act that way, but the last couple of days Ive been feeling odd so I was. So I hope it works out later.

Well, she writes me saying that I need to chill and that shes just been busy. Whatever. Thats an explanation at least wheteher or not its the truth. Shes never been too busy before to talk to me. But now its definatley done because she now knows that Im insecure. I tried to hide that insecurity, but now that its out there she might not talk to me again because she hates clingly people. I normally dont act that way, but the last couple of days Ive been feeling odd so I was. So I hope it works out later.

You know what sweetheart, I just ended a friendship of 2 years with a young man for such a reason. Until now hes been so perfect for me and to me, but the last couple of weeks have been like you just described, and even though I'm not a very confident person, I found the courage to walk away before he makes me feel like I hate the spineless me I see in the mirror. Please dont let this girl do it to you! Shes gonna be a game player.:o

Ok! Thanks everybody for your input! I really appreciate your time and consideration in giving me your viewpoints! Thank You all very much!