his parents did a 180 degree.....

HI MY NAME IS SHELIA AND I AM NEW . I THINK THIS IS GONNA HELP ME ALOT BECAUSE NO ONE I KNOW IS IN A RELATIONSHIP LIKE MINE. I AM 38 AND MY FIANCE, ROB IS 24. WE ARE REALLY HAPPY AND HIS WHOLE FAMILY WAS HAPPY (SO I THOUGHT) FOR THE LONGEST TIME. WE HAVE BEEN TOGETHER FOR NEARLY 3 YRS. BUT MY TEEN KIDS CAME TO LIVE WITH US,( 17 AND 13) AND THINGS HAVE CHANGED(OFCOURSE) BUT ROB HAS STEPPED UP TO THE PLATE BEAUTIFULLY AND IS ASSUMING THE ROLE OF STEPDAD VERY WELL AND HAS FALLEN IN LOVE WITH MY KIDS. WE MAKE A VERY STABLE FAMILY, SOMETHING NEITHER OF MY KIDS HAD IN THE PAST.....NOW HIS PARENTS HAVE TURNED ON ME, THEY THINK I AM TYING HIM DOWN TOO YOUNG HE SHOULD BE WITH SOMEONE HIS OWN AGE AND WENT AS FAR TO TELL HIM HE SHOULD BE OUT PARTYING LIKE HIS OLDER BROTHER (WHO IS 30). I HAVE CRIED A BUCKET OF TEARS OVER THIS BECAUSE THEY ACCEPTED ME INTO THEIR FAMILY FOR OVER 2 YEARS, I NEVER HID THE FACT I HAVE KIDS AND THEY WILL BE BACK WITH ME ONE DAY...I HAVE TRIED TO MAKE AMENDS AND SENT A BIRTHDAY GIFT TO HIS MOTHER AND SHE CALLED ROB AND THANKED HIM , NOT A WORD TO ME ...SO I AM GIVING UP FOR NOW. THANKS GIVING IS A FEW DAYS AWAY AND IF THEY CANT ACCEPT ALL OF US THEN IT IS THEIR LOSS. SINCE ROB HAS BEEN WITH ME HE HAS A HOME, FAMILY SOMEONE WHO ADORES HIM, AND A LIFE. BEFORE WE WERE TOGETHER HE WAS ON DRUGS(HE HAS BEEN OFF THEM FOR OVER 3 YEARS AND IS DOING GREAT) WAS IN SERIOUS DEBT AND JUMPED FROM BED TO BEDAND WAS HOSPITALIZED FOR ATTEMPTING SUICIDE. SO WHY WOULD HIS PARENTS EVEN WANT THAT LIFE FOR THEIR SON AS OPPOSED TO THE ONE HE HAS NOW??????:confused:

Sorry about your problem. It probable is not permanent. His family need time to get used to your children.

Quote: HE WAS ON DRUGS(HE HAS BEEN OFF THEM FOR OVER 3 YEARS AND IS DOING GREAT) WAS IN SERIOUS DEBT AND JUMPED FROM BED TO BEDAND WAS HOSPITALIZED FOR ATTEMPTING SUICIDE. :eek: :eek: :eek:

well people can change, adam was a bad boy once, he did get it out of his system very early but he was a rough character, once upon a time, did all harm to himself and not to others though.

anyway, three years clean and sober and responsible count for something, try very hard to stay focused on what you do have and let the parents spin.

just love him and keep supporting him emotionally like you have been and i dont see a reason why things should change. this is not the end of the world.

its an outside issue trying to come into your home, dont let it, you dont have too.

thank you so much for the support... these are things i know are outside trying to come inside and perhaps because their marriage is on the rocks has alot to do with their feelings about us. my age has been and issue for his dad because i cant have more kids but like i said, i laid all my cards on the table from the beginning and this just makes holidays hard, we have to "pretend" so much and it's for the sake of my kids and Rob's ypounger brother and to tell the truth i would prfer not to have them in my home at all if they cant come to grips and just be happy for us.....

........issue for his dad because i cant have more kids but like i said, i laid all my cards on the table from the beginning ....

sorry to hear about your problem, time is the test of all. His parents relationship change could be a factor.

if he can't isolate external comments (family or friends) then you need to make him stronger.

just curious, why can't you have more kids?

fact is you have kids, they count.

unless your guy is really wanting to have a baby of his own, i would not be so fast to assume that he does not adore the family that came with you.

i know my husband is nuts for my two grandsons, zack the oldest made him cry twice last week when he told him that he misses my husband and loves him and wants to spend the night at Christmas with us. Adam asked me if i told him to say that, and i said nope, you are stuck with us, we all love you.

we love our private time, if i were younger (47) maybe having a baby would be first most in my mind, its really not, as my husband says "I" am all the baby he needs to spoil and love.

gotta love that.

his parents wanted grandchildren but his only other brother who is also married does NOT want children either. Both he and his wife who are young by the way have never wanted children. its just how they are.

fact is i am bombarded by the grandson's, we have our kid fix filled.

you cant change who you are or who he is, if you two dont have any issues with the kid issue, let it go!

go enjoy the holidays and say a prayer for your in-laws that they are blessed and find their own happiness and then go kiss your fella.

When my YM's parents found out my age (me 38/him 18) they were not happy to say the least. They didn't want him to get settled so young with one person, they were suspicious about me being the person I said I was, and I think they are worried about him not giving them grandchildren now.
The odd thing is that 1) he would never have played the field anyway - no matter what the ages of the women involved; 2) if I was going to lie about myself I would have said I was 17 sheeesh; and 3) he does not, never has, and never will want to have children of his own.
If they knew him a bit better, they'd trust his judgement more. I know I do.

All These Things Are Very True And The Part About Their Relationship Surely, But I Know They Wanted Grandchildren Of Their Own. I Would Not Be Closed Off To The Idea Of Giving Him A Baby But My Tubes Have Been Tied For 13 Years Now, To Get Them Untied Is Expensive And We Just Dont Have The Money For That. We Have Discussed Adoption And That Would Be Something In The Future We Will Most Likely Look Into. But For Now The Wedding Next Year And Looking To Buy A House Are Taking The Front Burners And I Know That Once These Things Fall Into Place Then Their Attitudes Will Come Around But In The Mean Time They Have Hurt Me So Bad And I Dont Even Want To Give Them The Satisfaction Of Knowing Just How Much Yet...i Will Communicate When I Am Ready And Right Now I Just Want To Be Mad For Awhile Now That I Am Not Crying Abiut It Anymore....ya'll Are Great On The Insight And Advice I Must Say...i Told Rob About This Site And How It Is Helping And He Was Thrilled I Found An Outlit For These Feelings...he Wants To Give The Address To His Mom And To Be Honest I Dont Know If I Agree With That...