Well, well, well

LOL - so "it" finally happened.

One of my 16 year old daughter's school acquaintances came onto my husband very aggressively tonight right in front of me! It was a little strange but, thankfully, my husband (with a beet red face) put his arm around me and, when this girl informed him that he *will* be taking her to England to show her around the country, he took my hand and politely extracted us from the conversation.

Afterward, we both talked about how weird the whole thing was... I was slightly taken aback; he was mortified!

:rolleyes:

:eek: How very awkward, Mrs. HH. Was your daughter a witness or is she still in the dark about her buddy, the vamp? ;)

Sorry it happened, but frankly I am not surprised at all! This is what many of our male teachers have to deal with with these "innocent" young women (who are 15+ going on 25) decide to go after whomever they deem they want. And whose to blame? Hmmmmm... most of the time NOT the men, that is for sure. That is why even though I am a woman, I told my boys not to trust many females once they have their "sites" on them, and doubly my son who wanted to teach high school but I told him please consider middle due solely to that fact. However, he has discovered that even these "vamps" dress so provocatively that he purposefully tries to stay clear of them (and can pretty much so as he does in-school suspension) except when they purposefully do something so they can be with him. It is all pretty disgusting. AND I do hope your daughter knows about what had happened....and I would never allow her back into your home, to be honest. Sad... huh?

I think that you and Mr. Hedge Hog may have taught her a lesson about people in committed relationships, MrsHedgeHog. I hope she understands that her comments/behavior were inappropriate and decides to refrain from doing the same thing to other men in committed relationships or marriages.

It is a primal reaction to be attracted to a man in a relationship and want him to be in a relationship with us, but at 16, she still has a very good chance of learning that it is better to find an unattached man that will be a good mate for her, rather than listen to her lizard brain that tells her to go after a man that is a good mate for someone else.

To the rest of you -- thanks :) We were actually out at a grocery store with my daughter when we ran into her friends.

Nobody said anything until we got back to the car but my daughter was disgusted. She tends to hang around with a GREAT group of kids -- some whom I've known since they were in kindergarten! I think that's why I was so bowled over -- this was certainly a diversion from the norm! Apparently, this girl is a "hanger on" in their crowd and what happened is just par for the course. The girls are getting tired of her behaviour and, for my daughter, this was the last straw.

Surely he enjoyed it.

Every man would.

Surely he enjoyed it.

Every man would.

Well, of course! And it's flattering when a younger man admires me, too! But, at the end of the day, my husband is the one who makes my heart skip a beat. I am the one whose hand he grabs to make a run for it in the rain. He is my best friend. I am his. And that is a treasure that I wouldn't jeopardize for some stupid phone number in a million, zillion years.

so if you trust your husband so much then what would be wrong with him showing her around the english countryside?

Well, of course! And it's flattering when a younger man admires me, too! But, at the end of the day, my husband is the one who makes my heart skip a beat. I am the one whose hand he grabs to make a run for it in the rain. He is my best friend. I am his. And that is a treasure that I wouldn't jeopardize for some stupid phone number in a million, zillion years.

And, from what we know of him, neither would he! ;) All men are not alike, and I am typing and deleting and typing and deleting and typing and deleting, in a battle with myself to comment about people that make such statements.

All men are not alike.

http://www.nocturnalsoldier.org/Tealin/troll.jpg
TROLL ALERT!!!

so if you trust your husband so much then what would be wrong with him showing her around the english countryside?

You're serious? Bah. Obviously, you're new to this site and evidently you subscribe to a different school of thought than we do. If you genuinely want the answer to that question, you'd have to know a lot more about us and, since you appear to be more interested in opposition than actually learning about the way a strong couple operates, it's not worth the effort it would take to explain it.

edited to add, per my husband's request, that he is 25 and not 19

I don't get what you're saying at all, but I doubt I'm missing much and Mr. H is over 19. Any attention a man of his age would give to a kid her age would most certainly be met with police action.

looks like someone's changed their minds... good plan :cool:

I have removed many posts from this thread regarding relationships with underage individuals as well as personal attacks. I'll send a PM to the individual involved. Until I get a chance to send a PM, this is a public notice to refrain from violating any further site rules.

Not to mention that there's no reason Mr H should take her anywhere even if she was his age. Why him? I don't get it. Its not like this is his niece or relative...I would just chalk it up to the stupid things hormonal teenage girls say in trying to be grown up. She's somewhere in the middle of it all and lets face it, do we really sit down with our daughters and instill in them ladylike qualities and integrity. I would say that is a small percentage of parents who take the time to nurture. The rest of the time teens and young adults have to learn "on the job".

This whole new generation of most teens have been raised by wolves, honestly...


Paris

OMG, this girl sounds nuts!

I had to chuckle when I read the first post, because it reminds me of a situation Robin described. He was picking up my daughter and her friends at the mall, and they all piled in the van all noisy and chatty like they always are. Robin was zoned out, listening to talk radio. Presently, he noticed that the van was unusually quiet, and looked into the rear view mirror. He said ALL of Shelby's friends were staring at him! :D He just looked straight ahead and kept driving, relieved when the ride was over! LOL I just had to laugh, because I could imagine the mortified, uncomfortable look on his face while a bunch of teens stared dreamily at him.

It's really pretty normal for teens to be attracted to an adult figure. I know the boys who work in the kitchen at the restaurant I work at are always flirting with me, and yes, I catch them staring at me too.

I used to think that Robin might not be able to handle teen advances very well, that they'd freak him out, but he has projected such an authority type figure for so long, that I know it won't be an issue. One of Shelby's friends recently called him her "dad". She said, "He's not my dad, he's my stepdad." The girl was sure he was her natural father. He has said he refuses, in this day and age, to put himself in any precarious situation that could be misconstrued, and therefore won't go to pick up any of Shelby's friends by himself, for instance. He's just really funny about that. As crazy as teens can be sometimes, I don't blame him!

Oh boy...well, well, well is right!

I've had this happen too, except a friend of my daughter's actually tried to KISS Jamie.:eek: And you know, she KNEW he was my significant other. So it wasn't any sort of innocent thing.

J kind of laughed it off (my daughter was with him when it happened, and I think he was trying to make her less uncomfortable). I tried to, but hey, it really isn't funny.

for some reason age gap relationships really wrile up people, perfect strangers find it acceptable to make judgements and comments within ear shot of us.

to be honest i have heard younger wemon (who did not know i was in an agegap relationship) refer to relationships such as mine as gross, somewhere in their tiny little pea brains they really think all it would take is flirtation to change a younger mans mind.

maybe, just maybe, there is a reason the younger man is not interested in the first place.

oh the drama of some of these younger girls, they just make it easier for us to look soooo good.

Well Kittylane, there ARE some younger men who could be enticed simply by flirtation by a younger woman...luckily, they aren't OUR younger men! :)

I've personally never heard a younger woman say that an OW/YM relationship was "gross". Actually, I've had nothing but support from younger women, in my own personal experience. I'm sure there are younger women out there who do think it's gross, I just haven't encountered them. I don't read on the "other side" much either, but for all I know, they might be saying it over there.

Anyone who flirts with someone who is involved in a relationship is a pea-brained, worthless idiot in my book, whether he or she flirts with a younger, same age, or older person. It doesn't matter. The other person is involved with someone else, that makes them unavailable! Anyone who wants someone who is unavailable is sick in the head...PERIOD! Besides, if that person would leave their significant other for the flirter, sooner or later, the flirter would be left in the dust as well, because this person isn't a person who can be trusted, nor can the flirter, as that person has no moral background to speak of.

If we choose people with good moral character, Pamela Lee Anderson can flirt with them all day long and it won't matter! It's not in their make up to cheat or to vacate a relationship for something with no foundation. People of good moral character are available in all ages. They recognize a strong foundation, a good heart, a reason to stick it out, and they don't fold at the first opportunity. They're GRATEFUL for a morally sound person such as themselves and treasure that find.

LOL - my 16 year old thinks it's creepy that my husband is just a couple of years older than her big brother but she's reached a level of acceptance and, in the past couple of months, has actually begun treating Tim like he's a fully functioning and welcome member of the family (complete with genuine "family hugs" when merited)! This has been a HUGE "hallelujah" moment in our family.

And she definitely, definitely, definitely thinks her classmate is gross for what she did.

First Mrs H., I would try to turn it around and take it as a compliment (she can eat her heart out).

He loves you, thank goodness you have no reason to feel insecure. Women are funny creatures. They love to snatch what's not theirs. Pitty the girl and make sure your daughter has a heads up. You will unfortunately be facing these sort of tests throughout your marriage. Young, old, it doesn't matter. There is no respect. Pat yourself on the back, give your hubby a big hug and move on.

Intime