lepetitechatte
03-16-2007, 02:21 AM
Hi everyone!!! *waves little hand*
I'm back, YES, back :bgrin2: , maybe some of you don't remember me now, but I used to comment a lot on this website in 2005-2006, but I stopped for a while...
The reason, well, I broke up with my (ex) BF last year (he's 42 and I'm 24 now), almost a month after our 1 year anniversary, when we came back from a trip to Guatemala I realized that the relationship was going nowhere and that he was NEVER gonna love me the way I wanted him to, specially because I'm a VERY, EXTREMELY (almost nutty) affectionate person, and he... Well, he was rather cold most of the time, and just occasionally affectionate... That could NEVER do it for me, I grew resentful, felt unloved, though in general I didn't have much to complain about, he was always a gentleman and treated me good, but maybe 18 years of age gap was too much for us, at least more than I could handle, and apparently, for him too...
When we came back, I felt a need to put things clear, to know if the way I was feeling was ever gonna change, and the reality is that it didn't, whenever I would say that I had missed him, he'd get cold and maybe he thought that I was being clingy or whatever, for me, it was just showing how much I loved him... After that I understood that I could no longer be with him... I told him that I wanted to break up, but instead he wanted us to still be dating each other, but at the same time date other people too, that convinced me that DEFINITELY I needed to get away from him, as far as possible!
It was not the 1st time that he had proposed that, in the past, when we almost broke up on February 2006, he also mentioned that, but of course I said a definite NO to it, and so he had to set his priorities straight, but let me tell ya, things were never the same since then... Just because of that idea, I started doubting the whole thing, and maybe yeah, it took a toll on us, but I don't regret it a bit now, because I found someone who loves me deeply, who is not afraid to show affection, is even funny how one little change in your life can make you glow, me breaking up with my ex was the best thing that I could've done, I wouldn't even be engaged by now if it wasn't for that... :runnningaround:
My fiance is 7 years older than me, LOL, I know, not much compared to my last relationship, but believe me, I feel 1000000000000000x better now.
And don't get me wrong, is not that I didn't love my ex-bf, I loved him dearly, maybe that's why I stayed for so long holding on to a dream... But at the end, I just had to let him go... I thought that maybe he'd find happiness the way I did too.
Unfortunately, for what I know now... Things aren't that good for him now, and he gets jealous whenever I mention my fiance, he's dated and all, but uh... He just hasn't clicked with anyone yet. I still wish him the best :)
So, if anyone in here is going thru pain because of a break up is gonna happen, think twice before you sob... I'm not saying that you won't because God knows I did, but when I got it into perspective, my grief only lasted week and a half. Why so short? Not because I didn't love him, but because I needed to move on onto something better, something that would be a permanent happiness in my life. I know there's always hard times in a relationship, and I know because mine isn't perfect, but when you see the difference, you realize how awesome it is when you are with someone who is COMMITTED to make the changes necessary to make it work, to adapt, to be understanding... Not perfect, but at least work on things.
Things will NEVER work if only one is pushing, both have to push so the relationship can move and grow... At least that's what I've learned from my experiences...:p
I hope everyone's doing good, and thanks to the people who gave me support in the past!
*invites everyone to group hug* :grouphug:
I'm back, YES, back :bgrin2: , maybe some of you don't remember me now, but I used to comment a lot on this website in 2005-2006, but I stopped for a while...
The reason, well, I broke up with my (ex) BF last year (he's 42 and I'm 24 now), almost a month after our 1 year anniversary, when we came back from a trip to Guatemala I realized that the relationship was going nowhere and that he was NEVER gonna love me the way I wanted him to, specially because I'm a VERY, EXTREMELY (almost nutty) affectionate person, and he... Well, he was rather cold most of the time, and just occasionally affectionate... That could NEVER do it for me, I grew resentful, felt unloved, though in general I didn't have much to complain about, he was always a gentleman and treated me good, but maybe 18 years of age gap was too much for us, at least more than I could handle, and apparently, for him too...
When we came back, I felt a need to put things clear, to know if the way I was feeling was ever gonna change, and the reality is that it didn't, whenever I would say that I had missed him, he'd get cold and maybe he thought that I was being clingy or whatever, for me, it was just showing how much I loved him... After that I understood that I could no longer be with him... I told him that I wanted to break up, but instead he wanted us to still be dating each other, but at the same time date other people too, that convinced me that DEFINITELY I needed to get away from him, as far as possible!
It was not the 1st time that he had proposed that, in the past, when we almost broke up on February 2006, he also mentioned that, but of course I said a definite NO to it, and so he had to set his priorities straight, but let me tell ya, things were never the same since then... Just because of that idea, I started doubting the whole thing, and maybe yeah, it took a toll on us, but I don't regret it a bit now, because I found someone who loves me deeply, who is not afraid to show affection, is even funny how one little change in your life can make you glow, me breaking up with my ex was the best thing that I could've done, I wouldn't even be engaged by now if it wasn't for that... :runnningaround:
My fiance is 7 years older than me, LOL, I know, not much compared to my last relationship, but believe me, I feel 1000000000000000x better now.
And don't get me wrong, is not that I didn't love my ex-bf, I loved him dearly, maybe that's why I stayed for so long holding on to a dream... But at the end, I just had to let him go... I thought that maybe he'd find happiness the way I did too.
Unfortunately, for what I know now... Things aren't that good for him now, and he gets jealous whenever I mention my fiance, he's dated and all, but uh... He just hasn't clicked with anyone yet. I still wish him the best :)
So, if anyone in here is going thru pain because of a break up is gonna happen, think twice before you sob... I'm not saying that you won't because God knows I did, but when I got it into perspective, my grief only lasted week and a half. Why so short? Not because I didn't love him, but because I needed to move on onto something better, something that would be a permanent happiness in my life. I know there's always hard times in a relationship, and I know because mine isn't perfect, but when you see the difference, you realize how awesome it is when you are with someone who is COMMITTED to make the changes necessary to make it work, to adapt, to be understanding... Not perfect, but at least work on things.
Things will NEVER work if only one is pushing, both have to push so the relationship can move and grow... At least that's what I've learned from my experiences...:p
I hope everyone's doing good, and thanks to the people who gave me support in the past!
*invites everyone to group hug* :grouphug: