To say "hi" to all...and what to expect!

Hi ! to all ...I'm new to the site, and really thankful that you are all here and that this site exists. I am venturing into a new relationship...one that I have no experience with....but one that I really want to be a success. My (ym) is 22 and I'm 45. At first, he lied and said he was older for fear I wouldn't take him seriously. And maybe he was right...but as I spent more time with him, I found him to be one of the most exceptional, loving, and genuine men that I have met or been with. After awhile, I didn't care so much about the age difference. He looks far older, and I look as if I'm in my mid 30's....so thusfar no one has assumed we're mother-son! I have never been in this type of relationship..he has..and so if anyone can offer me/us any type of advice it would be much appreciated.

I live in California, he in New Jersey...though he is moving here with me in 2 months. In the short time we have been together I have learned some very difficult lessons...mainly to not mother him! and it's so difficult ! kinda habit for me, but I'm giving it my best effort. Just want to say thanks again for being here!

Hi Unseenrain...
I just want to say welcome to you! :) There are a lot of nice people here in similar situations, and we sure welcome your opinions and advice, and hope that you feel free to turn to us when you need the same! *smiles* Best wishes....

One thing to remember...be yourself. Don't feel like you have to change your ways in order to keep the relationship going. When I think back I had to be more of a mother to my exhusband then to my YM. We are woman and have a very nurturing instinct.

By the way I am 38 and my YM is 23 and we have been together for almost 3 years. You are on the road to a great adventure. Sit back and enjoy.

Best of Luck to you both.

Hi, and welcome. I'm fairly new and I can totally recommend you stick with this site. Any time you need advice just post your query. You can rest assured you will get loads of interesting and helpful responses.
Ari

Your story is cute. Tell us more--how you met, etc.

My relationship has a 23-year gap as well, but we are 12 years older than you and your guy are.

I am also very maternal and nurturing to my men, but I make sure to let them father me, as well. I ask for my guy's advice and help without a second thought. He is better in a lot of areas than I and I know it. When I am helpless, I don't try to cover it up and then I thank him profusely for being there and helping and tell him how wonderful he is. You just need to fine-tune the mechanics of your relationship and you should be fine.

Good luck!

Hi,

Welcome to Ageless. It's wonderful that you and your YM are getting on so well that he is moving in. Did you meet on line? Bear and I did the on line thing for a year before he moved here. It's fun but frustating, not to mention expensive.

Your description of him is typical of the guy who really works well in an ageless relationship. They do seem older, more sure of what they want and don't have a problem with age. They are mature enough to look inside a woman for what is important.

Bear and I were married this past July. I am 55 to his 29 and no one has mistaken us for mother and son either. No one has had a problem with our relationship and we have never had the snide remarks that some have suffered. I have a hunch that being open about it and acting comfortable makes a big difference in how others see you.

I think all women "mother" men a little, the trick is to not boss them around. Chicken soup is acceptable...making their decisions for them isn't. I back off and let him run his own life. He in turn, will ask advice if he feels he needs it. We have a great partnership mostly because we have agreed to have one and we work at it every day.

I hope you stick around this board and let us know how things are going and how the move goes. It's very brave of him to move away from everthing he knows to be with you. It's one of those little heroics that we sometimes take for granted. I know you must be very proud of him for risking so much to be with you. Keep us posted on how it goes.

Peace,
Bear's Angel