Confused and sad

This is my first post here although I have been reading on this site for some time.

Well here goes, I have just finished a 6 year relationship with my ym, I am 46 he is 35. Mostly in all that time we have just been 'FWB', I have tried ending it many times before, but always gone back to him after he gets back in touch with me as I truly love this man. I was married previously for 21 years and never felt the same way about my ex husband as I do about this guy.

We started out for the first 2 years as just friends, and then things turned sexual about 4 years ago but never progressed from there, I was always hoping that maybe someday he would want to make some sort of commitment to me, I think in all this time we have only been exclusive to each other in the bedroom dept as I believe his word on that, but just yesterday I ended our so called relationship as I just can't deal with the hurt and insecurities any more. Now I feel like I have this crushing pain in my heart and just don't know how to move on without him in my life, he has been such a big part of it for so long - please help me out, I feel like my world has come to an end.

Any advice would be appreciated.

Thanks

I am sorry for your pain, but I will be honest with you & say you FINALLY made the right decision. You may feel like you love him, but love has to be reciprocal to be healthy. If it's been fwb for 4 years, it's not going to change. If you give him space & you are able to communicate your needs maybe he will decide he wants more, but don't hold your breath. FWB always benefits 1 of the parties & hurts the other IMO.

Move on & find someone who wants you OUT OF THE BEDROOM!!!

Big hugs,
Lovaholic

Thank you for your reply, you are just confirming what I already know and that I am making the right decision by walking away from him, just wish I knew how to deal with the hurt and pain that I am feeling right now.

I wish I had some magic pill to make it all better, but all I can say is the same old advice you always hear: take it one day at a time. Try to do things that help you feel better and treat yourself the way you would a best friend who was going through the same thing. And if you have friends you can spend time with and talk to, go see them and cry on their shoulders. It WILL get better. It just takes time. You made the right decision for yourself. Now the door is open for the real thing to come into your life.

You are so strong- you have to know that about yourself. Don't look at things as mistakes- look at all you've learned about yourself. Take it day by day and just set small goals for yourself. I wish there was more to say....

Yes it hurts & it's okay!! BIG HUG! Try and be positive & don't dwell on the negative aspects of all of this. Tell yourself that it was meant to be & it was a learning experience & it did have meaning. Don't ever regret anything you've done just learn from it. Grow, be stronger, healthier, wiser and you WILL be happier. He was in your life for a reason & although it may hurt like hell now; someday you will be able to look back on this with a big ah ha & know why.

Chin up beautiful!!

These women said it all...HUGS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I am sorry for your pain, but the others have said all I would have said as well, and they said it good...
You do need someone that can give you what you give them...
in and out of the bedroom...

you have choosen wisely...just live, love and be happy.

I'm here if you need to talk, we all are...
I've been through it, and so has most everyone if I'm not mistaken...

much love
and hugs

Thank you all so very much for your kind replies. At the moment I am feeling kind of numb about everything and just trying hard to get through each day. I don't regret anything I had with him as it was a special time for me and we had amazing chemistry, but I do know that it was stopping me from moving on in life and maybe finding a partner that wants to give me more. At the moment I can't even contemplate looking at another man, but will never say never and I feel so much better for reading your kind replies!