We're together!But...

I posted a few months ago about the older guy I liked (I'm 18, he's 42).

Anyway, I didn't have to worry about telling him because he decided to make the move himself!! We are having a fantastic relationship and I am so love I can't describe. I already know we are going to get married, everything is perfect. We get on so well on every level, humour, intellect, sex, everything is wonderful...

Apart from...

...my parents.

The thing is, they did know about it to begin with and let it go on for about a week, then they completely changed. They said they were 'disgusted' and that 'there must be something wrong with him'..etc etc. It wasn't atall nice. They made me phone him up and tell him I wasn't allowed to see him anymore. Anyway, that lasted less than a day and we started seeing each other secretly.

We are so in love it hurts, but I don't know how to convince my parents. They think he'll stop me going to university (which he definitely will not) and that i'll just move in with him and choose him over a career (I'm going to study Law). This isn't the case however, I know he'll completely support me in whatever I want to do. They also have some idealistic vision in their head of me meeting some nice Law student that I'll bring home for dinner and (they've said this) 'we can watch you grow old together and experience new things together'. They think that as he's older, i'll be missing out on all this.

If they found out they'd go crazy. He's a teacher at my college (although not mine, technically he could get in serious trouble - not mentioning my reputation) and so they'd probably report him. This problem can be overcome when I leave after my exams in the Summer. However, it's more the emotional side of things I find hard to deal with. I am really really close to my parents so deceiving them in this way plays havoc with my conscience.

Has anyone else had a similar experience? How did they manage to convince their parents?

He is the one.

BBxx

It might be a mistake to date this guy. But it would be *your* mistake. Then again, it might work out. I see both sides. They care for you and want the best for you. In their quest, however, they fail to realize that even if it is a mistake, you need to make it.

I find it ironic how so many "adults" manage to screw up so bad in terms of relationships, that we have a 50 percent divorce rate in this country (give or take). Guess they/we dont know so much after all.

Your issue isn't about your OM. It's about your parents. They are probably telling you what to do on other issues as well. They have this vision in their mind about how you should act and what you should do. You ceased to become a living human being and became property to them.

You're old enough to be held accountable to legal contracts and serve in the military, but "too young" to make your own decisions about who you date?

Right now, the issue is an OM. Next it might be where you live. Or who you live with. Or a change in majors/careers. Or where you work.

Your situation will be resolved only when your parents respect you. The question I pose to you now is...(no offense intended) are you acting like a little girl that needs to be told what to do? Only you can answer that one honestly.

good luck.