Could use some YW insight...

I've been lurking around this forum for about six months on and off, and have finally decided to give this a try because this little family seems to be a really caring bunch. I'm a 59y/o male, who has spent the past year-and-a-half getting closer to a 35y/o YW that I work with. A little background before we go too much further.
I changed jobs at the beginning of 2006, as a Physical Therapist in a small nursing home. The lady in question was already working there as a Social Worker, and, for some reason, we just seemed to hit it off right from the beginning. Within a month of my arrival, she found her fiance was cheating on her, and of course, that relationship headed downhill over the next several months. During that time, our own friendship grew, and it seemed we would make occasions to call one another or run into one another during the course of the day. On a couple of these occasions, she broke down to me about what was going on at home. She was still living with this guy (they co-owned their home), and the evenings were constant fighting and she was a mess.
At this time, I knew I really liked her, but really saw the relationship only as a growing friendship. I had no romantic inclinations at this point. At any rate, the little flirtations continued. She'd make cookies or something for their morning meeting and would send the remainder up to my department. She had been involved in a motor vehicle accident some years ago, and severely injured her ankle. I offered to do some treatments on it to help keep the swelling down. Don't know just how successful the treatments were, but it certainly gave us the time together to do more talking. Long story short, it finally occurred to me that there might actually be a connection here, and so after a lot of soul-searching over the age issue, I asked her to dinner.
The girl ran like a rabbit! Absolutely wouldn't consider it, and avoided me at work for weeks after. Needless to say, I was devastated. I couldn't understand the run-away except that she was still messed up with this cheating fiance.
Let me take a moment and explain the attraction from my standpoint. My YW is the most beautiful woman I know. That said, she is also one of the brightest people I've ever met. I've frequently thought that, if she hadn't settled on social work, she would have made a first-rate physician. I've often thought that the two of us suffer from the same affliction. We both have brains that just don't ever shut off. The difference between us is, whereas I tend to be tenacious and stay on a subject until it's complete, she amazes me with her ability to juggle literally dozens of problems and thoughts and keep them in order. I think the intellect thing is one of the greatest attractions, and I think it attracted both of us. We could problem-solve anything at work, and it was always fun working with her for just that reason.
Currently, she's dating a man she met since her breakup. We are back to talking and, to me, this is where it gets confusing. She still has no trouble flirting with me, either in phone calls or when meeting face-to-face, and it seems the two of us still try to run into each other during the course of the day. When I asked her what she was doing for this New Years past, she told me about dinner and a movie. When I asked with whom, she told me about this guy, but she wouldn't look at me.

I'd better wrap this up or no one will read it. Maybe I'm obsessing on the girl and maybe I'm just a delusional old man, but truth is, I just really think there's a connection here. I also think she knows it. I'd really like a little help.

Thanks,
Mike

Hi Mike,

I think this yw in question is frightened by the age difference. She seems to like you and I am tempted to think that maybe she doesn't have romantic feelings for you, but you think she is still flirting with you. In this case I believe she is frightened by the age difference.


Do you know the age of the guy she's presently dating?

What are your hobbies? Do you enjoy any outdoor activities such as hiking? Maybe you could invite her to share an activity that is done during the daytime and would limit the amount of time you'd spend talking about yourselves. Dinner with just the two of you seems to add pressure and emphasize the fact that you are on a date. If she's apprehensive, then an activity that entails some amount of unconscious physical contact and fun would help to put her mind at ease and help her to see your fun side. She would be so absorbed with the activity that she wouldn't have time to think about the age difference or whatever it is that's preventing her from taking the leap and at the end of the activity she might be just blown away by the amount of fun she had with you and how much she enjoys your company.

I think you should continue to be her friend but find ways to show her different aspects of your personality. Many yw think that men over 50 are boring and will only inhibit their youthful exuberance. If you show her that you are an active, fun loving person then she might become less apprehensive.

Ok. I would hold off for a while. Here's why.

She is hurt. The man she loved hurt her by cheating on her. She is already dating someone else, which is a rebound, and more often than not, rebounds end in more devastation. This is a way to cover up pain and help with her self esteem. Flirting can also be a way to help with esteem.
Your age can be a shock to her, only if she's used to dating people her own age. I would let her go for a while, be her friend, and try not to get caught up in emotional disaster. She is confused right now and it leaves you confused also. Flirting for younger people tend to mean less than it does with older people.

Thanks ladies, I'm grateful for the response. Goodchild, I do not know the age of the guy she's seeing, but I inclined to think it's someone around her own age. An interesting point on the idea of seeing me romantically. When we were first getting to know one another, my old boss used to comment on the fact that we acted like a couple that had been seeing each other for a while. She actually confronted me on this once and asked what I thought of the idea. Of course this was before I actually asked her out. My thinking is that there may have been a time when she fantasized about a relationship between us (makes sense since the guy she intended to spend her life with was doing his best to break her heart to pieces), but when the reality of that possibility popped up, it was more than she could handle.
Scott, I'd like to think this current guy is a rebound, but it really has been some time since the break-up (she moved out in September of '06, and may have started seeing this new guy this last Summer, not sure about that).
I agree with you both about continuing to be a friend. We work quite closely on occasion, with patients and patient's families. I think if you asked her, she say that she's quite proud of me and the care I've given my patients. I know I'm proud of her for the attention to detail she puts into her's.

It's funny though, you know? When I left my other job, I wasn't sure where I was going to work next (a little spooky for a guy my age). I happened to get this job through friends that knew I was available, and then within a couple of weeks of me showing up, she finds out her fiance cheated on her. I don't want to get overly philosophical about this, but there's a part of me that thinks I was supposed to go there to find her. Guess we'll see.
Thanks to you both. I owe you one.

Mike

Hey Mike,

Glad you decided to join! I'm a female in in my 20's so I'm a little younger than your lady friend, but I felt compelled to comment.

You don't have to respond, but I was wondering if this woman has any children? Perhaps she and the man she was engaged to planned on having kids. The reason I bring that up is because if she's looking to start a family, she's probably going to be really cautious about who she dates. I can't imagine being in her position and losing that chance at 35. Maybe she feels safe with the rebound guy and is really scared to step out of that comfort zone---even if it's not really going anywhere.

Also, it sounds like she may have been intimidated by your age as well. I agree with an earlier post about doing something together that isn't as "date like" as dinner. Less romantic pressure might let the two of you just enjoy each other's company, and perhaps she'll open up a little more (emotionally to you and to herself to see beyond the age difference).

I wish you the best of luck! Please keep us updated :rolleyes:

Hey there....thought I would give my two cents....

I've not been in this YM's situation. (Thankfully) But, I have been in the situation where I was grieving over my own relationship, while at the same time getting into another one, which I'm currently in. (Please, try to keep up with this....I think it's germane to your situation. :) )

What I'm trying to get to now is the idea of BAGGAGE. The idea was just brought back to me this past week...

I was speaking with my Canuck (OM by 25 years), who I've been with for about 2 years now, as we were spending New Years at my place last week. The topic of "when this all happened" came up....

He had been separated for 2 years when we got together. And, I had had all of about 2 months to grieve for my lost love (yes, he died) before getting into this relationship. Not that there's too much that I can do now about it all, but I feel like it was too soon to get so close to him. And, honestly, I think it's affecting our relationship at this point.

So, after saying all of this, I would have to stress to you to keep your distance romantically. Let her lead you with it. Step back a couple of paces and see what she does.

There's a LOT to be said about "getting over" things.

I wish you all the best. :)

I'm happy you were able to share with us, Mike.

It seems to me that she values your friendship very much.

This could be a reason on why she may be showing any reluctance, if she was to get involved romantically, she may be worried about ruining a good thing if the relationship doesn't work out.

She could very well be attracted to you, but since you say she is intelligent and a bit of a thinker, she might be weighing the pros and cons.

When I say this though, it might not necessarily be because of the age difference, it could be something she does with any prospective relationship. She is most likely just protecting herself or being cautious, moreso after her previous relationship.

I would just continue what you are doing by being there and some day hopefully in the near future, you might both decide to take the relationship to the next level.

I hope everything works out for you. Take care.

Thanks for the replies. I'm amazed (and humbled) that folks on here care enough to reply.

Adeladb - No, she has no children and yes, that was most certainly the plan with the guy who cheated. What makes matters even worse was, he was her first high school sweetheart. They had seen each other through school, then he left and married someone else. At some point, he got divorced, they found each other again (through her mother), and became engaged. I know through friends that children were a part of the plan, and I understand what a devastating loss that can be.

Mishigas - Baggage in a big way. She comes from a broken home (oldest of twins by a father who never married her mother and denied the paternity), and required treatment for ulcers by the time she was five or six. Worked to support her family all through her teen years. A huge inferiority complex. I know all of this through others as she would not have told me most of this.

Esjayo - Weighing the pros and cons are certainly part of all of this; you're so right. After all that has happened, protecting herself is certainly the sensible approach.
Ladies, you all have said to stay friends, and it is certainly my intention to do just that. I don't currently see her wanting to get together with me, for any reason , outside of work. I think that safe zone is very small. What I may do (if you all agree) is ask her about the current man in her life. I know she didn't feel comfortable talking about him to me earlier, but the truth is, I was one of a few people she could talk to when she got so hurt before, and I most certainly don't want that to happen again. What do you all think?

Thanks so much,
Mike

It seems to me that she values your friendship very much.

This could be a reason on why she may be showing any reluctance, if she was to get involved romantically, she may be worried about ruining a good thing if the relationship doesn't work out.

She could very well be attracted to you, but since you say she is intelligent and a bit of a thinker, she might be weighing the pros and cons.


Mike, I would agree with the above assessment. My OM and I met at work when I was 19 and he was 50 and quickly became friends with a very similar intellectual connection as what you have described. Two years later the friendship had deepened, I knew how much I liked his many good qualities and had begun thinking that I would like to find someone like him (never considering, because of the age difference, that he would be interested in me or that a relationship between the two of us could work out). Not long after I realized this he did ask me about becoming more than friends. I ran, not because I wasn't attracted to him--I was, but because I was afraid of how a realtionship would affect our friendship and whether it could even work given our ages.

He did the best thing he possibly could have (and what I recommend to you) and that was to wait, give me time and whatever space I needed to figure out what I wanted, and continue to treat me with the same friendship as before. After several months of considering the pros and cons, and based on the kindness with which he treated me during this time, I worked through my initial hesitation at the age difference and we started seeing each other. This was just the beginning and it took us a while longer yet to really work through the age issue and what it would mean for us (regarding, kids, life expectancy, etc.). I am now 24 and he is 54, we are engaged and will be married in March.

So anyway, this is my story from the perspective of a YW and I hope it helps you to see what she might be going through on her side.

Amy

"He did the best thing he possibly could have (and what I recommend to you) and that was to wait, give me time and whatever space I needed to figure out what I wanted, and continue to treat me with the same friendship as before."

Amy, thank you. You aren't the first to suggest maintaining the friendship, but you certainly have provided the most compelling reason. One of the things I've done in the past when I seem to be having my worst times, is to tell myself to accomplish 3 things with this YW.
1. To be helpful. I've always been there for her when the need arises.
2. To be kind. It seems as if the simplest acts are the ones that make the
most difference.
3. To be silent. Good words whenever I can, but no need to be overbearing.

I'd like to think that something must be working because frequently, when we run into each other at work, I get the sweetest smile. God, that smile (sigh!).
You've given me a story that parallels mine in so many ways, and I thank you for it. Maybe, in time, it'll end the way your's has,......or shall I say really begin. Congratulations on your upcoming wedding. Your OM is a lucky man.

Mike

I agree with everyone here that you should remain friends. Don't push too much, but try to just work back into the sync you had once had, don't be afraid to open up to her as well to make her feel less threatened. Maybe it would be good to mention the infamous asking her out episode and apologize for making her uncomfortable and tell her you value your friendship to her more than that. You know what I mean?

I think if I had been in her situation I would be afraid as well. I woudn't want to be looking for anyone just yet, and maybe she hadn't really given too much thought to a romance with you... although you did mention the thing about your boss making the comment and to what she said, but I agree that maybe the reality of the situation was too much, and Amyjet gave excellent advice that I think I can use myself!

Patience. That's all I can say. Day by day. I can't judge for sure that this man is just a rebound, I can say that I dated a guy when I was "rebounding" from my 1st "Real love" and my rebound lasted 6 agonizingly miserable years... so there's something to what scott said.

She opened up to you before, and I have a feeling she will again... so just be there when she's ready.

"don't be afraid to open up to her as well to make her feel less threatened."

Thanks Lily,
Funny you should mention that. A few days after Christmas, I was down in her office reviewing information on prospective patients. When we finished, she asked me if I was doing alright. "You've been off a couple of days. Is everything ok?" The truth is, I'd had to take my daughter for some medical testing, and I was concerned, but hadn't said anything to anyone. When my YW asked, it just sort of opened me up. I talked about my daughter and her health, her difficulties with work and men. Talked about my son in NYC and his goals of getting into the movie business. I went on and on and on. In retrospect, it was embarrassing, but I certainly felt better afterward. I found her later that day and thanked her for listening to me.
As it happens, I asked her today to help me with a resident that I may have to cut from our program. I wanted her opinion on the resident's feelings and how she might react to the news. My YW has great instincts for this sort of thing, and I really do count on her.
I appreciate your input Lily, and wish you well with your instructor. Here's hoping we both have something to cheer about soon.

Mike

If there is anything that I have ever learned about relationships, it is that there is an ebb and flow. Now isn't the time, that's all. There is a cycle at work here. Let it work within you too. :)

I think Rebecca's got something for both of us with this ebb and flow. LOL We seem to be sharing the same dilema of our interests running away! ha Ebb and flow buddy! I hope she comes around! Feel free to PM me anytime! :)

"If there is anything that I have ever learned about relationships, it is that there is an ebb and flow. Now isn't the time, that's all. There is a cycle at work here. Let it work within you too."

Thanks Rebecca, I couldn't agree more and I really think that a part of that cycle for me was creating this thread. I was feeling a bit of a mess when I first posted here. The responses (including your own) have helped immensely. The friendship is in place and seems to be growing, if ever so slowly. Seems as if the least I can do is continue to post when (or if) there is any progress. Thanks again.

Mike

:)

I have found that when I hold on tightly to what I think I want, I am being driven by a fear. When I let go and get connected to Love (for myself first then I can love others), I reap more than I ever thought I would. This has happened many times in my life. Fear just makes me friggin' nuts! Love empowers me (real love, not "take-them-hostage-cuz-I -luv-him" )

Yeehaw! freedom!!!

You've given me a story that parallels mine in so many ways, and I thank you for it. Maybe, in time, it'll end the way your's has,......or shall I say really begin. Congratulations on your upcoming wedding. Your OM is a lucky man.

Mike

Thank you Mike!

Keeping the friendship is always a good thing. For my OM and I it gave us a really strong foundation when we were ready to pursue a romantic relationship. I suspect your YW has had so much drama in her life recently she may have just been overwhelmed by the possibilities and considerations that would be involved in an age gap relationship. Time is probably the best thing for her. If you continue to be there for her as you have, I'd be interested to see what develops between the two of you once the rest of her life calms down. :bgrin2:

"If you continue to be there for her as you have, I'd be interested to see what develops between the two of you once the rest of her life calms down."

Me too!! Tell you what; I promise to waste everyone's time on here with frequent (oh please God, please!!!) posting of any progress I have, as long as you all return the favor. Here's hoping this forum becomes very busy very soon.

Thanks Amy,
Mike

Mike I've been following your thread, I haven't posted because you asked for YW insight. But I want to let you know I'm in your corner cheering for you buddy.

George

Yes I want to see some progress Mike!:D

"I've been following your thread, I haven't posted because you asked for YW insight. But I want to let you know I'm in your corner cheering for you buddy."

You're a good man George, and your "aged wisdom" is invaluable and always appreciated..............even if you are younger than me. If you have something to say on any thread of mine, please feel free to say it.

...and you make a good grandpa,
Mike

Hey Man it's been over a week and you've been in my thread more than your own! What's the haps? How's the lady? Tell, tell!

Hey Man it's been over a week and you've been in my thread more than your own! What's the haps? How's the lady? Tell, tell!

No news Lily, I'm sorry to say. She's still very into this guy she's been seeing. We're still working together frequently, and I'd like to think the friendship's improving but it's hard to tell. I happened into her office early one morning last week, and she had a flower arrangement on her table. When I asked, she said it was from this guy, so I used the opportunity to find out a little more about him. He seems to be doing all the right things, and she likes him a lot. The whole conversation broke my heart, but I had to ask. In the end I really want her to be happy, and certainly don't want her to be hurt again. ..................., of course I think that I'M the one she should be happy with. Guess we'll see.

Mike

Awe.... :( poo!

I think she should be happy with you too! I think YOU would make her HAPPIER just my opinion from getting to know you through the forum. You seem like the real prince of the fairytale! And baby women have lots of shoes!

You know it's ironic, you don't want her to be hurt again... BUT if she were.... I think she may run right back to you like she did the 1st time....

It sucks being put in the friends corner.... lol have to make the best of it though, I guess it's an easier way to show ones good character and favorable qualities while subtly leading them over to your side.... mmm those "friendly" compliments, all the hugs LOL Things can definitely move forward when in this position... sometimes it just take awhile!

Might I suggest bringing her some coffee or something in the morning? Maybe if you got there a little earlier you could have a breakfast date...? Just a thought on subtlty. :rolleyes:

Awe.... :( poo!

I think she should be happy with you too! I think YOU would make her HAPPIER just my opinion from getting to know you through the forum. You seem like the real prince of the fairytale! And baby women have lots of shoes!

You know it's ironic, you don't want her to be hurt again... BUT if she were.... I think she may run right back to you like she did the 1st time....

It sucks being put in the friends corner.... lol have to make the best of it though, I guess it's an easier way to show ones good character and favorable qualities while subtly leading them over to your side.... mmm those "friendly" compliments, all the hugs LOL Things can definitely move forward when in this position... sometimes it just take awhile!

Might I suggest bringing her some coffee or something in the morning? Maybe if you got there a little earlier you could have a breakfast date...? Just a thought on subtlty. :rolleyes:

Wow Lily, what a nice thing to say. You're right, there are parts of right now that hurt a lot, but I really think I'm just where I'm supposed to be. Whether she likes it or not, she's stuck with me involved with her professional life every day she comes to work (she called this afternoon to see if the two of us could meet with a patient's family this Friday afternoon). At some point, something will lead to something else, that'll lead to something yet again. As the theater owner in SHAKESPEARE IN LOVE put it, "Strangely enough it all works out in the end." When asked why, he said, "I don't know. It's a mystery." That's a great movie.
I'll make a deal with you though Lily. If the girl doesn't start smartening up sometime soon, I'll pay your way up here, and you can read her the riot act. What do you say?

Mike

I say that is an awesome movie!

And I'm down for a trip! hehe :rolleyes:

Hi Mike

I’m glad you posted because I got an answer, too, in Amy’s first post. “The girl ran like a rabbit.” I immediately thought that’s a good sign and Amy’s answer confirmed it.

I think that unfortunately there is no thing like friendship between the sexes (at least in my life because every time I wanted friendship she would fall in love with me…), and your case proofs it again, because at least YOU are in love…

Perhaps with a 19 year old girl a man should have plenty of patience but with a 35 year old woman? I don’t think so. Don’t push but “gently progress”, as I would call it. Perhaps she only ran because you didn’t progress smoothly? There was too much a difference between your every day’s encounters and suddenly being asked out for dinner?

Don’t offer her friendship, offer her something like comfort. Make it clear that you want more than friendship but do it in a subtle way. Typically, after a divorce comes a short relationship that will break up, too. Let that guy be her next relationship! After him she is ready for you. I have to admit, that’s a little bit contradictory, but that’s how life is… Wise words of an old man… Oh me, oh my…

BlueBird

Blue Bird's words are very wise... Once in my life I was married to a man 23 years older than me... He romanced me. After 9 months we got married... After 15 years we got divorced and now 11 years later here I am posting...

Mike go for it, he who does not risk does not gain.

Good luck to you!

Perhaps with a 19 year old girl a man should have plenty of patience but with a 35 year old woman? I don’t think so. Don’t push but “gently progress”, as I would call it. Perhaps she only ran because you didn’t progress smoothly? There was too much a difference between your every day’s encounters and suddenly being asked out for dinner?

Bluebird and Alta, thanks for the posts and I appreciate the advice. I'd like to think that I've been working to "gently progress," as you say. I'm still convinced that she ran as much because her life at home was a disaster as because of the invite to dinner. That said, doing smaller things to sort of ramp up to the dinner invitation makes sense. I'm not giving up, and I'm not afraid to move forward. At this point though, the current man in her life makes too much persistence on my part seem out of place. We're closer than we've been in quite a while, in spite of (or maybe because of) the "other man." My profession has taught me to be very patient. I think I have to be that way now.

Thanks for the encouragement.
Mike

You've got it right. Patience is a big thing.

Let's see if I can remember the time line right. I think it was at least 5 or 6 months from the time my OM first asked me about being more than friends--and that wasn't even asking me out on a "date"--before I was ready to respond. As I said before, my reaction was to run. I kept my distance for a while, but then over time things between us sort of went back the way they were (working together, having lunch, etc.). I can't believe how patient he was with me, but I am glad he was. If he had pushed I probably would have run for good.

Eventually, I was more comfortable with the idea and we started emailing each other over a holiday break and things progressed from there.

It sounds like you are doing all the right things in your situation. And if she breaks up with this "other guy" you'll be in just the right position as a friend to develop the relationship further. I wish you all the best!

Amy

You've got it right. Patience is a big thing.

It sounds like you are doing all the right things in your situation.

Hi Amy,
I'm always encouraged when you feel the need to respond because your relationship with your OM so seems to parallel mine here. I will admit that most days she still makes me crazy, and it would be nice to get a full night's sleep, but when all is said and done, I wouldn't miss this little adventure for anything. I also really do believe this is what I'm supposed to be doing. I suppose I could always look for another place of employment, but I really like where I work. I like the kind of medicine I've been practicing there. I also really like working with her. She's a serious medical professional, and if you were going to have to put one of your parents in a nursing home, this is the lady you'd want working for you. For anything else I may feel about her, I admire her resourcefulness and dedication to her patients.
I just re-read this little diatribe. It's amazing just how much I have to say about this YW, but before I bore all of you to tears, I guess I could sum it all up by saying she simply touches me deeply from almost every angle. I think I'm infected! What a pleasant disease.

Mike

Well, it's been a while and I thought I'd pop in a quick update. My YW and I seem to be making progress in the friends department, although this seems painfully slow. There's hardly a day goes by without a phone call from her about one of our residents or another. I'm frustrated that her contact with me is almost entirely business. She is more than willing to talk socially if I pursue that direction of conversation, but will not initiate it.
The man she was seeing has been down-graded to friend seen occasionally, but not a relationship that's going anywhere (more or less her words).
I had a birthday a couple of weeks ago (turned 60 George, ya' young whipper-snapper!), and my department threw me a party. When we sat down to the table, I noticed another place set, and about that time there was a knock at the door. It was my YW friend with a cake she had baked (it was wonderful!). As it turned out, she had contacted my supervisor to ask when my birthday was and told them that she wanted to bake me a cake. Needless to say I was delighted.
I'm not so foolish as to believe any of this the beginnings of something earth-shattering, but let's just say I remain hopeful............, and maybe a little more optimistic.

Mike

Mike,

Baking you a cake, wooohooo, my man. That's a 3 page love letter! You betcha.

oh hey now you can say, "the cake you baked me was wonderful, i hope the dinner i'd like to take you out to is just as good" :rolleyes:

i'm sorry i couldn't help myself!

Well, it's been a while and I thought I'd pop in a quick update. My YW and I seem to be making progress in the friends department, although this seems painfully slow. There's hardly a day goes by without a phone call from her about one of our residents or another. I'm frustrated that her contact with me is almost entirely business. She is more than willing to talk socially if I pursue that direction of conversation, but will not initiate it.
The man she was seeing has been down-graded to friend seen occasionally, but not a relationship that's going anywhere (more or less her words).
I had a birthday a couple of weeks ago (turned 60 George, ya' young whipper-snapper!), and my department threw me a party. When we sat down to the table, I noticed another place set, and about that time there was a knock at the door. It was my YW friend with a cake she had baked (it was wonderful!). As it turned out, she had contacted my supervisor to ask when my birthday was and told them that she wanted to bake me a cake. Needless to say I was delighted.
I'm not so foolish as to believe any of this the beginnings of something earth-shattering, but let's just say I remain hopeful............, and maybe a little more optimistic.

Mike



Ok, well.... HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY!!!!

secondly.....

SHE FRIGGEN LIKES YOU! Let us not recall what I did as much as possible to try to communicate my feelings to the OM I liked.... I BAKED!!! I pretended every tueday I was martha stewart! Yeah... I didn't know what else to do! A man's heart is met through his stomach so I've always heard!!!!

And she asked your supervisor when your birthday was?!?!?! SOOOOO SWEET!!!! Ugh! I wish things weren't going as slow as they are but they're definitely looking up in my opinion! Esp since that guy has been "down graded" LOL that's great news!

*hugs*

:D

Yayyy, that's a step in the right direction. That's so wonderful to hear Mike, there is no doubt how much she cares for you. I am so happy for you xoxox

Baking you a cake, wooohooo, my man. That's a 3 page love letter! You betcha.

Thanks to all of you, but the truth is, she THE baker for this facility, and has done cakes for other employees, including other men, for their birthdays in the past. We'll see. Her birthday is coming up on the 15th of this month. Now I can't bake to save my life, much less come close to that creation she came up with for me. What I've decided to do instead is serenade her with my own rendition of HAPPY BIRTHDAY at the facility morning meeting........on the tuba.

Still trying,
Mike