Is this an age thing or a long distance thing?

My past relationships have been a variety of long distance, living together, same and different ages, but the one thing they've always gone through is different "stages".

What I found was that after about a year the honeymoon phase was over, and by three years there was no passion left whatsoever and we'd part ways (if we even made it that far) except for the humdrum relationship with my ex I have kids with. We stuck it out for the kids but it wasn't meant to be.

Now that I've known my man for five years online and three years in person, I feel like we're going through some kind of major transformation. We've overcome some important obstacles in our long distance relationship and we've had a lot of personal growth.

We're completely wild about each other, passionate like the first time we met, and we are moving ahead with our plans to get married and live together, now that we've reached certain goals we had set (getting jobs and a place and visiting each other--for a long time I was the only one travelling).

What I'm wondering is whether anybody else has gone through or is going through this renewal of passion three years in with a younger man or older woman, or is this simply part of being in a long term, long distance relationship?

What are your experiences with "stages" or "phases" in these special relationships?

I don't post much anymore, but I read a lot and I just had to post on this thread. LDR, 4 years online and 3 in person.

We are going through this exact thing! It's like a renewal of being absolutely crazy about each other again. I don't know if its normal or something that happens in LDRs or what.......so I'm anxious to see what answers you get as well.:):)

Shan

We were long distance for 3 or more years (had not met during that time)and have been together now for 4 years...the passion is still here. We are crazy about each other.

He looks at me like he might eat me. When I look at him I just melt. When we look into each others eyes we have a hard time letting each other go when we have to part ways to go to work and such.

I dont know if its an age thing or not. We have been living with each other since he got here in 2003. So I know the honeymoon stage is over but we relive it over and over. I just think I have finally found someone that loves me and whom I find easy to love and completely irresistible. He is young, sexy, sweet, cute, foxy, lovable and most of what I could ever want in a man and partner.

He is not perfect, but either am I, we can look past each others imperfections. The passion has always been there and I dont see it going away anytime soon.

I just noticed your ticker (smiles) are you trying for a baby? I am jealous...as much as I would love to...I just dont think my body could do it. I know one thing...if we had a baby together it would be so beautiful. He has strong genes (Cuban) and my genes cant be too weak my son looks just like me.

Be happy for what you have with your ym, I know I am very happy with mine and if the passion has staying power, all the better. Yep!

Wendy

PS: Do not know if I answered the question you were asking, probably not, but I think I know what you are saying.

I just noticed your ticker (smiles) are you trying for a baby?

More like, not trying not to have one...it's not the ideal situation but we decided to leave it to chance. I have a job with full medical benefits and he can help financially, but we're not living together yet.

If we wait until I'm 40+ before even considering it, then I'm not so sure that we'll have as much of a chance to conceive a healthy baby.

As for my original post, I guess I'm trying to ask whether it's common to feel this way at the three year mark, or after so many visits, or whether it's because he's matured so much in the past year (he'll be 23 in a few months)?

Perhaps all of the above :)

I vote all of the above. It's all the elements of the relationship that have made it what it is, and so its all of the elements that make it as good as it is. Enjoy it. I'm picking up Chris from the airport in 1/2 hour and we get to spend 10 days together!!! Things with us just keep getting better and better as well. We're 11 years apart. Maybe it's a magic number ;)

We will celebrate our 4 th wedding anniversary next week. Before that we spent 3 years doing the LDR. We have phases where we are very much in a honeymoon frame of mind. Like falling in love all over again. We are going through that right now. It's wonderful! I am not sure how often that comes around. I know that we get along wonderfullu anyway...and just when I think I couldn't love my husband more, there comes a stirring deep inside and it's whoosh! Elevated! Whatever the reason...I love it!

My bf and I have been living together for 2 years after 2 years of LDR and our relationship goes through ebbs and flows of passion and love, but I think that is normal, we are creatures of our environment and sometimes our environment is tough, sometimes we are stronger than it.
:)
He still can make me shiver when he runs his fingers on my skin.

I think the Greeks have a set of definitions of love, storge, eros, etc. I wonder if we go through all of them at times in our long lasting relationships? It sounds like Sdoah and OP are doing just that!

Ali