time together and apart

hi all,

just wanted to get a little bit of feedback from those of you in an AGR who dont live together yet. i see my OP (older partner) every other weekend at least and some during the week. during the weekends we arent together i try to keep myself busy. ive recently attempted to go out more with friends and have enjoyed a few outings to local bars etc. i had a ton of fun. when i am with my OP we tend to do things just the two of us because we dont have a tone of time together. id really like us to do more of these types of things but im worried my OP wont want to go out to bars etc with others because of our age difference (18 yrs), maybe me being in a different phase or something. we have gone dancing etc before and out some with friends and had a ton of fun. is this something i should expect to share or should i just focus on doing this in my downtime away from each other? just looking for advice on shared activities versus separate activities....what is reasonable? i know that sometimes it is easy to see things through the lens of an AGR when it doesnt necessarily fit.

John (my OM, 23 years older) and I spend our weekends together from Friday afternoon to Monday morning. He calls every evening when we're not together and we'll often catch a movie or dinner during the week. We give each other a lot of latitude when we are in the weekend mode. If one of us wants to do something in particular, we just put the request in, then we'll talk about what we "have" to do, or other meetings/appointments we may have and start working around the request from there. Sometimes a request to do something or go somewhere may not get an immediate response of action, and we'll put it toward the next weekend or even the one after that. If something "comes up" that is just an "I have to do go do this!!" kind of experience, we will go individually if the other can't. No biggie, especially if it's on a short notice and won't be around again. We want each other to be happy, that's the bottom line and it's not about always having to do things together. If we can and want, we do. We have common interests, but not all of our interest are in common. Often he will support my interests even if they are not his, often I do them same for him. It's an ebb and flow, give and take, flexible relationship. We never ever make demands upon each other. :no: