Help!

Okay, this is one of those "funny but not funny" things and I need everyone's help.

I have a roommate. At first, I thought she was just "urban" and more abrupt with her opinions. I've since discovered that she is the roommate from hell. She's nearly 30 years old and it's like living with a 14 year old. She sleeps all day, parties all night, has friends over (loudly) at ungodly hours and is loud, rude, obnoxious, etc. The other people living here have had it with her and, since I'm the one who said she could come live with us in the first place, I got the fun task of telling her she's no longer welcome.

Tuesday night, we were informed that she was going to have a dinner party beginning at 8pm on Thursday night. A work night. I asked her to please consider having her dinner party earlier, since Thursday is a work night. Her response was, "oh well! we're going to be up late, too. And we're going to be loud. So get earplugs." :eek: :mad: This is not the first time she has really ticked me off so I said, "Look, A, this is not working --" she interjected with "no effing kidding" (only she actually said the word). I went on, "it's not working out. You're rude, loud, have no concept of respect for others sharing your living space..." (another interjection: "so are you!" ) ..."and you need to leave. This is why I didn't give you a lease. I'm giving you a 30 day notice in writing and, if you're not gone, I'm going to have to start the eviction process." Her reply, "I'm not leaving." Me: "Yes. You are. 30 days. And why in the world would you stay in a place where you're so clearly no longer welcome anyway?"

Thursday night came. She invited nearly 20 guests and didn't even START dinner until 10:30. Prior to us going to bed at 11pm (late for me but the noise was LOUD), several of her friends came up to me, apologized for the late hour and left immediately after dinner. Most of them stayed though, laughing, screaming, music blaring loudly - it was like the parties I had back in college when I was 19!! Finally, at 12:30am, I walked out while they were screaming the lyrics to some song, and said, "A, I need to talk to you." She didn't look at me, waved me off and said, "Later." I said, "No, now," and I waited. She glared at me and said, "Oh. Let me guess. You're going to ruin my party and make me tell everyone to leave." I replied, "A!! It's 12:30 in the middle of the night on a WORK night. Everyone in this entire building except YOU has to be up and out the door for work by 7:30 in the morning! I don't care if your friends stay but you have GOT to quiet down; this is ridiculous!"

She screamed at me and said, "Thanks a lot, MOM. I don't need another 'effing' MOM so thanks for 'effing' ruining everything!!!"

I gave her her 30 days notice and she promptly changed the door knob to one that locks with a key on her bedroom door. I banged on her door last night when I got home from work and she refused to come out. I informed her (through the door) that she needs to put the original doorknob back on the door immediately. Naturally, she refused to come out, yelled at me to go away, and has been hiding in her room ever since.

Frankly, I'd like her to consider the wisdom in her leaving much, much sooner. I've told her she is not welcome to use anything of mine. My dishes, my furniture, etc. I won't remove anything from the apartment itself but her belongings are no longer welcome in my space. I'm also thinking about putting a temporary locking doorknob on the bathroom door and giving everyone else in the place keys for access. I won't break any rules but there's plenty I can do to creatively encourage her to leave since the direct approach didn't work. Any suggestions from your creative brains would be most welcome. I won't break the law but I'm ALL for doing things within the law to "encourage" her to make a permanent exit post haste.

all i gotta say, is where do you find them???? is this the same one who was redecorating? using your stuff?

personally, i would have crashed "her party" a lot earlier. what was the agreement upon moving in concerning guests?
i'd make sure i just HAD to vacuum before leaving in the morning...yell for the kids a lot, glare at her whenever possible...get a big calander and X down the days, bring home boxes...

*snorting laughter* okay, confession: since being reasonable didn't work, I'm actually doing things like what you said, christina.

Banging pans, talking loudly and all conversation ceasing when she walks into the room while everyone stares silently and then resumes talking the minute she exits, big calendar with "Days until 'A' leaves and this place becomes less toxic" on the fridge...

I feel a bit juvenile but I figure, if she won't treat everyone here with respect then we'll have to give her a dose of her own medicine and make it really uncomfortable here until she leaves of her own accord or I have to take my request to the courthouse.

p.s. yes, c, this is the same roommate I'd mentioned before!

WOW that is something...one of the many reasons I'd only live with friends or myself some people are just nuts!

I think you're doing everything you can. You gave her 30 days which seems reasonable (and very generous on your part considering the person she is), I don't think there is anymore to do now besides start the countdown and get her stuff out of the house!

Pay her to leave. That always works..

Check the issue of locking her out of a toilet. That may not be legal. It would not be legal in my country. :rolleyes:
Paying her is not a bad idea. That way she would have deposit money when she moves to her next victims.

Hopefully she will move into a SWF situation. Evil laughter. :EvilLaugh:

What are teh laws Kel on a 3 day eviction notice? I would file one if you can and then have a sherriff help you remove her if you can and change ALL locks on the door as soon as she is gone. This chick sounds like she is a toxic freak of nature and has issues BIG TIME!

30 and and acting like this WOW...I can remove her for ya *cracks knuckles*

OKAY just kidding there *gulp*

PS If it were me have all the other roommates gather round EARLY near her door and have a party...bang crap play muisc LOUD crap she hates...and toss her some earplugs

Sadly no money to spare with which to pay her off - I already have to pay my landlords for the damage she's done to the floors and walls in the hallway with her bike and I have to have the bathroom repainted due to the red hair dye she got all over the walls (we're talking splashes of red streaks covering about a 2 ft square area in my bathroom and flecks of red dye under my bathroom mirror).

But I love the SWF idea!

:)

If you take the op end of a fire ax where the stick is pushed into the head of the axe and place it forcefully just below the door knob the locking mechanism will cease to function and you will immediately gain access to her room again.

You just won't have a door to that room. :)

:rofl: cuteguy37048 - that is exactly what I was thinking of doing to her door!!! And do it at 0530 hours! :bgrin2:

I personally don't agree with giving her money; that would only reward her for her terrible behaviour. Continue with the "freeze-out" methods, including playing horrible music early in the morning to bother her (but don't give her earplugs).

Also, can you talk with a Legal Aid office for some free legal advice on how to get her out quicker? They may not be able to give you "real" legal advice but maybe somebody there knows another trick to get her out.....

I can help grumpysgirl "remove" her for you.... :giggle:

No wonder I refuse to have roommates. I like my peace and quiet.

:rofl: cuteguy37048 - that is exactly what I was thinking of doing to her door!!! And do it at 0530 hours! :bgrin2:

I personally don't agree with giving her money; that would only reward her for her terrible behaviour. Continue with the "freeze-out" methods, including playing horrible music early in the morning to bother her (but don't give her earplugs).

Also, can you talk with a Legal Aid office for some free legal advice on how to get her out quicker? They may not be able to give you "real" legal advice but maybe somebody there knows another trick to get her out.....

I can help grumpysgirl "remove" her for you.... :giggle:

No wonder I refuse to have roommates. I like my peace and quiet.

HEHE

YO KEL you say you got a roommate ya need help with *cough*

http://www.offoffoff.com/theater/2003/images/ashira69.jpg

LOL! I can wait it out and have a little fun while I'm at it... but I'll keep ya posted!

Warning... If everybody is out of the house for work or other purposes and if the roomie from hell stays alone in the house, she may do more damage that she has already done, thus one person needs to stay AWAKE at all times... She sounds vicious, be careful even with the water you all drink! :rolleyes:

Sorry do not want to sound crazy, but she sure does!

PS I do not know how you'all are going to be able to handle 29 more days with her in the house!!! :eek:

Warning... If everybody is out of the house for work or other purposes and if the roomie from hell stays alone in the house, she may do more damage that she has already done, thus one person needs to stay AWAKE at all times... She sounds vicious, be careful even with the water you all drink! :rolleyes:

Sorry do not want to sound crazy, but she sure does!

PS I do not know how you'all are going to be able to handle 29 more days with her in the house!!! :eek:

got to agree AND if you have a camera take pics of crap she does as well record her on your phone if you have a vid phone THIS way you have proof of what she is doing if it goes to court girl...

Got it all covered! John'll be here the whole day until the very end - the workers are here from 7:00 am until 5:00 pm, too.

We've got photos of all as well...

keep the advice coming - I really appreciate it!!

Got it all covered! John'll be here the whole day until the very end - the workers are here from 7:00 am until 5:00 pm, too.

We've got photos of all as well...

keep the advice coming - I really appreciate it!!

Can I still take her out...The *crack knuckles* the old school way

Ultimately, who has the lease on the apartment? Whose name is on the lease?

I remember this kind of crap from roommates in my past. Every now and then, you get these immature little nutbags who haven't a clue. I had one who was similar to this. Get this. I had to call her Mom to make her behave! :yes::no::yes:

:rofl: cuteguy37048 - that is exactly what I was thinking of doing to her door!!! And do it at 0530 hours! :bgrin2:

I personally don't agree with giving her money; that would only reward her for her terrible behaviour. Continue with the "freeze-out" methods, including playing horrible music early in the morning to bother her (but don't give her earplugs).

Also, can you talk with a Legal Aid office for some free legal advice on how to get her out quicker? They may not be able to give you "real" legal advice but maybe somebody there knows another trick to get her out.....

I can help grumpysgirl "remove" her for you.... :giggle:

No wonder I refuse to have roommates. I like my peace and quiet.


I was told by a firefighter/medic that was how they entered the room in crtical situations. He told me you can kick it but the axe works better.

The only thing worse would be a combo of that and tossing a flashbang into her room like a special operations mission.

You WILL need hearing protection for the flash bang and once you throw it immediately look away from the room and do not enter the room while you toss it, simply because special operations teams do the opposite of that to get used to it happening all the time but we are talking about you so don't do what they do if you manage to get your hand on one.

A flashbang delivers 150 decibels on ignition and will temporarly blind (A few minutes only) and disorient people in the room.

It's the ultimate revenge, but it's really loud :) lol

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T58mFGimmjw&feature=related

^ More on Flashbangs and Commando style operations

I was told by a firefighter/medic that was how they entered the room in crtical situations. He told me you can kick it but the axe works better.

The only thing worse would be a combo of that and tossing a flashbang into her room like a special operations mission.

You WILL need hearing protection for the flash bang and once you throw it immediately look away from the room and do not enter the room while you toss it, simply because special operations teams do the opposite of that to get used to it happening all the time but we are talking about you so don't do what they do if you manage to get your hand on one.

A flashbang delivers 150 decibels on ignition and will temporarly blind (A few minutes only) and disorient people in the room.

It's the ultimate revenge, but it's really loud :) lol

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T58mFGimmjw&feature=related

^ More on Flashbangs and Commando style operations

LOL would pay to see her face if flashbangs happened
http://icanhascheezburger.files.wordpress.com/2007/12/funny-pictures-stunt-cat.jpg

LOL - I'd love to see that!! Thanks for helping me get through this with good humor, everyone! It didn't take me long to notice that she's the type of person who's really agressive until you get aggressive back. At first, she was pushy and obnoxious to me but as soon as I started getting "in your face" right back at her, she started hiding in her room, skulking out the back door so she didn't have to face me, etc.

btw, there is no WAY I'd put anyone else's name on the lease along with mine. She's not on the lease and she has got to go. She's still got that door lock (which, by the way, is illegal in this state) so I'm giving her a 5 day notice to put the original back on or she's outta here by next weekend.

LOL - I'd love to see that!! Thanks for helping me get through this with good humor, everyone! It didn't take me long to notice that she's the type of person who's really agressive until you get aggressive back. At first, she was pushy and obnoxious to me but as soon as I started getting "in your face" right back at her, she started hiding in her room, skulking out the back door so she didn't have to face me, etc.

btw, there is no WAY I'd put anyone else's name on the lease along with mine. She's not on the lease and she has got to go. She's still got that door lock (which, by the way, is illegal in this state) so I'm giving her a 5 day notice to put the original back on or she's outta here by next weekend.

Lets hope she doesn't room with a Marine the next time :)

Kelley, legally, since your name is on the lease and you've given her 30 days notice already and she's ignoring you by doing that whole lock switching thing, you can give her 24 hours to vacate and if she doesn't go you are within your rights to call the cops and have her forcibly removed, you might want to check, you could even have her charged with trespassing.

Or, if you can get into the room, you could have John put all her things in the hall and you change the main lock, thereby locking her out of the apartment entirely.

A lot of states have a three day or quit policy and technically, you're her landlord and you've warned her and she's blantantly ignoring you, so, you have every right to expel her *** into the street.

Bear in mind that because your name is on the lease it makes you responsible for everything so ultimately any damages she does will fall in your lap if she won't pay for them and something tells me she won't, she sounds totally loopy.

It's Chicago, finding a new room mate shouldn't be too problematic - just remember that anybody you pick is going to become part of the ongoing custody battle - if even unwittingly. The ex is going to be looking at who you're bringing into the home and how it's going to affect your daughter.

Lastly, the whole explosion thing sounds good too...just take the batteries out of the smoke detectors first.

No advice, but lot's of sympathy! :( She sounds scary.

Kelley, did you give her a 30 day written notice?

If her name isn't on the lease, basically she has no legal right to be there. You have been more than generous giving her 30 days notice. I am wondering why your other roomates aren't sharing in the distasteful task of helping get rid of her. I would stick to my guns on this one and if she isn't out of the house at the end of her 30 days, then involve law enforcement. And don't EVER take on a roomate again unless they are on the lease! In fact, you are probably in violation of your own lease and you guys could find yourselves evicted if your landlord gets windof this.

See if you can get the roomies to back you up. I can't see why she would want to stay if she knew that nobody wants her there! I think what has happened is that this has become a nasty little game of cat and mouse in her eyes and she's enjoying this perverse little game.

Addend: I may have misunderstood. You are the landlord? You own the property?

There are oral leases/agreements/contracts... Kelley in her lease with her landlord may not have a right to sublease rooms, blah, blah, blah...

Today I am not feeling up to giving a dissertation on the applicable law, besides I know nada on Chicago/Illinois law.

Bellisama, check into it, just in case you may have a real crazy roomie there. Protect yourself in more ways than one, if you know what I mean!

~chuckle~ lesson learned, believe me!

I do not own the property but, as the sublessor, I am effectively her "land lord." There is no lease - we are on a month by month basis. Also, there are general "apartment laws" that we don't need to worry about since our building has fewer than 7 units (thank goodness).

I followed the law - she has 30 days; however, I am also serving her with a 5 day notice today. If she doesn't change the door knob on her bedroom door back to the original or give me a working key, I will have her removed after the 5 days - in Chicago, it is illegal to change the locks on any of your doors without giving your landlord a working copy of the key itself.

I will NOT be getting a new roomie any time soon. Lucent leaves back for England on March 16 as well AND my best friend will be in her own place by April or May. Things are going to be mighty quiet in just a few short weeks!

I could make her life SOOOO miserable lol. *sly smirk*

I don't even need a flash bang lol :)

She has no idea what pranksters are out there *meaning myself*

I'd be having some fun with this lady.. she'd be dieing to get out lol if it were me. lol

all I need is flash powder, rubbing alcohol, poster putty, a cardboard tube left after using up all the toilet paper and a small jute rope, and a decent steel plate to neutralize floor damage. :)

I could have so much fun.. lol :D

Kelley, legally, since your name is on the lease and you've given her 30 days notice already and she's ignoring you by doing that whole lock switching thing, you can give her 24 hours to vacate and if she doesn't go you are within your rights to call the cops and have her forcibly removed, you might want to check, you could even have her charged with trespassing.

Or, if you can get into the room, you could have John put all her things in the hall and you change the main lock, thereby locking her out of the apartment entirely.

A lot of states have a three day or quit policy and technically, you're her landlord and you've warned her and she's blantantly ignoring you, so, you have every right to expel her *** into the street.

Bear in mind that because your name is on the lease it makes you responsible for everything so ultimately any damages she does will fall in your lap if she won't pay for them and something tells me she won't, she sounds totally loopy.

It's Chicago, finding a new room mate shouldn't be too problematic - just remember that anybody you pick is going to become part of the ongoing custody battle - if even unwittingly. The ex is going to be looking at who you're bringing into the home and how it's going to affect your daughter.

Lastly, the whole explosion thing sounds good too...just take the batteries out of the smoke detectors first.

In all states you have to go to court to get someone evicted unless they want to go. It sounds like the person doesn't like Kelley, so if they found another place to go, they'd leave.

Ali