my situation

well, i´m just beginnig my relationship with a man 20 year older than me (i´m just 25). I feel a bit funny because is the first time i have such a realtionship. Everithing runs ok, but i still have some questions i´d like to ask.
As i said he is older, a year and a bit ago he finished his marriage (11 years) he said that the things between them went wrong (really bad) for a year before. His wife found another man and she started a full relationship with him.
He has 2 daughters, 11 and 16 year old.
The first thing is that he seems to be thinking about sex all the time. I´ve no problems having sex with him, but sometimes makes me feel he is only looking for it. well other thing i have to say is that he has a dissability because an illnes. I know a lot about it because i´ve worked with dissable people for a long time. His problem is that he can´t walk propperly so he needs sticks, but nothing to do with his sexual possibilities. Do you think it´s normal that he speaks about sex so much??

The second thing is about his ex. They meet each other every weekend and the times he needs to visit them. I´ve no problem with it because my parents were divorced. But when he speaks about the things that happend around her life, seems to be upset or even jealous. off course it gives me insecurity. What should i do?

I´ve spoken about this two things with him but seems its no changing. He feels that i can´t hear about his wife without making a problem, so he decided not to talk about her. Now i feel he is hiding something. What should i do?

I'm not sure about your man friend, but it doesn't sound as if he's over the pain his ex-wife caused him. Which doesn't necessarily mean he still wants to be with her, it just means he's still hurting and humiliated. Perhaps the reason he pressures sex so much with you is that he's trying to prove to himself (and maybe in an odd way to her) that he is still attractive and worthy without her. I think you may be a rebound relationship because sex seems paramount to him, and he still has a lot of concern about his ex's life. This can only be a losing situation for you, because you are caught in a game that you don't want to play. You need to have a serious talk with him to determine for yourself how much he really cares for you. Maybe he just needs more time to heal, but you don't need to let him use you while he figures that out. Good luck.

P.S. I once had an good friend from Bogota, and knew another Colombian boy who was an exchange student. Both wonderful people; I can't imagine any unpleasant people in Colombia! (Although I hear there are many...) :(

Yes it definatly sounds rebound......How long have you both dated?

You said all he thinks about is sex..... Well unfortunatly sometimes that is the case... You need to ask him if its YOU he wants to be with or is it just physical... a physical relationship is ok only if it is consentual by both parties involved......

His ex he will always have contact with.... they have children together... but there converasations and there meetings together should ONLY be about the kids.....Personally they are unattatched.....

Lucily my fiances ex is in Ohio.... hehehe... but He still talks to her when his son calls his mom.... but just and ONLY about his son and nothing else....

You really need to talk to him and if he doesn't want to listen then you may need to walk away until he does...

I would really hate to think that it could only be a physical relationship, but it sounds like it just might be. However, there are (and a know a few) people who find love on the re-bound, and are very happy together, but more often than not...it's not the case. I'm sorry to hear of you hurt, do what's best for you. A serious talk seems to be in order.