On my way....

Hey every one its been awhile since i posted here if you search my name you can get my whole story. Basically me and my G/F have a age gap of 15 years. I am 20 she is 35 and we have a distance gap too. I am in MA shes in TX. well Tuesday morning I will be flying out to be with her for the whole summer (3 months). I found an apartment down there for $150 a month. I been working ever since 8th grade so I got enough money just to just chill out down there and be with her... This isn't the first time we met either, we met 2 times before this but just for a few days though. I was suppose to come down for a week on spring break but one of her kids hurt himself and the trip was canceled. Anyway a lot of my friends are saying how much they are going miss me and how they don't want me to go. Also I might not be able to see my friend who is in the army that is coming back from Afghanistan this summer. I mean I am leaving behind a lot my dad, my friends the place I called home for so long... i don't know just feeling a little down any one have any advice? And seeing my friend might be out of the question because I will be only coming back for one week this summer and its either my mom's endowment at a library or seeing my friend :notsay: so I don't know any advice will be helpful my aim is man88e if anyone wants to talk... any advice I will truly read

One comment that caught my eye, when your friends say they don't want you to go, it has very little to do with YOU and very much to do with THEM.

Other than that, all I can say is taking this time to get to know each other better is probably a very good idea. You will find out even more the extent of your compatibility.

Is there any way, if you pop back home for the visit, you can work in seeing your friend AND your mom? Perhaps not spend the full time at the library function, leave early or arrive late, and catch some time with your friend? Often times things don't have to be all of one and none of another.

One comment that caught my eye, when your friends say they don't want you to go, it has very little to do with YOU and very much to do with THEM.

Other than that, all I can say is taking this time to get to know each other better is probably a very good idea. You will find out even more the extent of your compatibility.

Is there any way, if you pop back home for the visit, you can work in seeing your friend AND your mom? Perhaps not spend the full time at the library function, leave early or arrive late, and catch some time with your friend? Often times things don't have to be all of one and none of another.

Thank you so much for your reply! Well I wont be seeing my mom. its an endowment in her honor. She passed away a few years ago from cancer. She owned two book stores which my dad and I take care of now with the help of the staff. Anyway thats why its at a library. The Town knew the loved booked and really enjoyed her book store.The thing about the trips is, I would love to make fast visits back home and back to Dallas but the the price of gas sky rocketed and some fights just one way going to Dallas cost $900 and I mean i have enough money to live down there for awhile but I can not afford expenses like that... I did the best possible thing though to make me feel better. I just talked to her last night. Communication is really the key! I feel much better and this morning reading your comment made me feel better too. I guess the thing i am scared of the most is things might change or go bad when i am gone. While i lived on my own for awhile in a dorm in Providence, Rhode Island. I was perfectly fine taking care of my self but when i was gone my mom just grew sicker and sicker. I even came home on the week ends but i still felt helpless... So i guess thats just my biggest fear is that something bad might happen while i am gone. But i really need to get over that. As for my friends missing me I will miss them too but your right I need to see where this relationship leads. I know my dad will miss me and be all alone down here while i am gone. But i also know he wants mt to be happy! so yeah. I hope every thing goes ok! 2 more days now

When my husband (now) moved from Arkansas to Wyoming, he felt a lot of sadness as well. He was excited to start a new chapter in his life with me. Yet I fully understood his feelings of sadness at leaving what was his life up to that point. Any time we make a change, I think we have mixed feelings going on. Leaving what is familiar to us is not always easy to do.

One thing you have in your favor is that your visit to Texas is limited (for now) to three months, so you know you will be returning to MA, to your father and friends. It sounds like a nice arrangement where you are able to spend an extended amount of time with your g/f as well.

Best wishes to both of you!

When my husband (now) moved from Arkansas to Wyoming, he felt a lot of sadness as well. He was excited to start a new chapter in his life with me. Yet I fully understood his feelings of sadness at leaving what was his life up to that point. Any time we make a change, I think we have mixed feelings going on. Leaving what is familiar to us is not always easy to do.

One thing you have in your favor is that your visit to Texas is limited (for now) to three months, so you know you will be returning to MA, to your father and friends. It sounds like a nice arrangement where you are able to spend an extended amount of time with your g/f as well.

Best wishes to both of you!
thank you fae

My bf had to travel all the way from Indiana to Panama. That was a huge shock and he missed home very much. He spent 3 months here, then went back home, then two more times before he applied for the Panama green card.

It does not matter if you go from one country to the other, from a small town to a big city or viceversa, it will be an experience in itself, with the added benefit that you will be with your beloved. I am sure you will make friends in Tx too.

btw I live close to Dallas.

Bring shorts.

And sunscreen.

:D

I can only imagine what you must be feeling, but at 20-really this is just part of the growing up process. Moving out, moving on, away from relatives and friends -but never forgotten. I remember when I was 23 my parents moved away from me and despite the fact that I was married and had a daughter it was very difficult to adjust life without them being so close.

My bf (now fiance) had visited me for only a week-then went home and moved here permanently (from Chicago to Seattle). I am sure this was difficult for him, but I think being with the person you love probably makes it a whole lot easier and definitely worth it!

You are not "leaving people behind", you are just changing the schematics of your relationships-adding the distance factor in there. I hope your trip goes well, and if you do end up moving to be with her-remember that you started your relationship with her long distance, so it is possible to still keep close to your friends and family when you aren't physically close to them.