new to the group

I just wanted to say hello. I've recently come across this group and I'm glad to see there are so many people out there in 'out of the norm' relationships. It makes it easier to deal with.

Hi Twiggy! Welcome. I'm sure you'll find this group as much fun as I have. Other than our age-gap relationships, another thing we all seem to have in common is a great sense of humor. Things can get really crazy around here sometime! (Yesterday's attack by QUIZILLA ;) )

Hope to see you post more!
Happy

Happy4Me, Thanks for the warm welcome, I'm looking forward to getting to know everybody. How did you come across agelesslove?

Not sure if anyone was interested but here's my quick bio:

22 (23 in july) live in TX
He's 44 (45 in june)
Been together a little over 1 year
it's been tough but still going strong
his kids are great!

Originally posted by twiggy
Happy4Me, Thanks for the warm welcome, I'm looking forward to getting to know everybody. How did you come across agelesslove?

You'll laugh! I was on the Internet looking to see if anyone had compiled a comprehensive list of successful May-December relationships (Bogie & Bacall are my favorites) and typed "May-December relationships" in my search engine and this came up. I was not expecting to find anything like this and was SOOO relieved when I read about everyone. It was a FORTUNATE accident!

Happy

I've not seen that movie...embarrassed to say. Is it worth a trip to blockbuster? What's the title?

Hi there Twiggy!! welcome to ageless!!

I actually found this site thru another site. I joined a group at yahoo for age gap relationships, and someone there mentioned this site here...and though I did like the people on yahoo, they didn't archive their posts...so my inbox was getting overcrowded...I like this site for the fact that they do keep extensive archives. Plus, the people here are great...you'll make great friends if you stick around!!

And congratulations on making your relationship work for a year so far--a lot of us are newbies. I bet you'll be saying, "Why didn't I find this sooner?" lol I know I did!

You're right lara, I would have been happier had I found it sooner. Lots of unanswered questions to things I just had to figure out on my own. But, I learned alot about my weaknesses and my strengths...so I think those experiences will help me later on down the road.

Hi Twiggy, welcome aboard!!
I found this site through a link from another group and checked it out. I join and unjoin forums all the time but I really like this one.
It's friendly, informative, and most of all these are a fun group of people who can kid around but are also very honest about their feelings. AL.

just wondering (for those of you who don't mind telling the story...once again!) how did everyone meet their special someone?

Hi Twiggy!!

Sorry I didn't roll out the welcome carpet yesterday...but I played hookie from work :) So today is: WELCOME!!!

I'm so glad you found this site. It really helps in a time of need. A lot of the times we just have fun...but when it comes to relationships these people are wonderful! You'll meet wonderful people!!

Well, I am 22 and my honey is going to be 40 in to weeks. We met through my ex-roommate and his former employee. We were intereseted in each other and then started dating...hence the "ex" roommate/friend and "former" employee. She hated it...but we're happy-we have our problems just like anyone else. You'll get to know our lives really well...so don't hesitate to post!!


Again - Welcome :D

Welcome Twiggy!!!!!!!


you have come to the right place for advide about these relationships......

My answers were answered.... now i have an attatchment to this site... I love it

I am 27 turning 28 in may and my OM is 44 turning 45 in june

Hi Twiggy! I am fairly new here myself, but I sense you are a balanced and thoughtful individual.

I am 40 and my guy is 60. We met through a mutual sport - equestrian jumping. So far, we haven't crossed the friend barrier yet, but I think it may happen soon.

~Morgaine

Hi Twiggy

Where are you guys located in Texas?
Mcca is 19 and Im 52 and we have been together for 6 months and were married last weekend on April 5th in Eureka Springs Ark.

We are located in the DFW area.


Randy

Congrads breaker... hope all works out for the best for you two

I love to know that people take that next step!! Congrats and warm wishes and love your way :)

Hi Twiggy, Welcome,
Although I'm the newbie here ....lol

How did I find the website? I was looking for sites to tell the difference between antique's and reproduction antique's (old VS new).......No just kidding folks! did a younger women/older man search on google! And this site has by far outdone all the other sites I've looked at with its home hitting topic's and seems to have no fears of reprocussions about the sensitivity of the questions.

Its great! Both myself and my S/O have had alot of questions, fears, ponderings all of the, what ifs and how comes that I've already seen covered here in just a few days of surfing the site. We've also seen that the folks here have a great sense of humor, and I can't help but notice that compared to "other" relationship sites, that as a whole the couples seem to be so much happier in their relationships!
Maybe its just me but it seems like older/younger relationships seem to try harder to work out their differences moreso than the norm's relationships do?
Yes I'm aware that theres couples that are struggling with their love but it just seems so much less than the regular sites!

Your next question, How did we meet?
Well She WAS my step daughters best friend. after they graduated from high school the step daughter moved her in with us since she was having problems with her home life. Mind you nothing had ever happened while I was with my wife (I was a diehard "if you've taken those vows you stay no matter how unhappy you are" type guy) who sadly didn't feel the same way about the vows and decided that she was happier with whoever it was she left me for (sorry also not a stalker so have kept myself from wanting to know who she's with now) But I seem to be going off in a different direction now.

When my wife & step daughter moved out they left her behind to stay. The step daughter had severed all friendship with her over other issues they'd gone through. And although I'd told them you both moved her in you need to find her a place to stay.
With her staying and my being in such a lonely time of my life we found comfort in each others arms and we've found a love that time doesn't compare with.

So anyhow this all makes me out as the dirty old man in my midlife crisis 41yr old with a jag and a 19yr old g/f (aren't stereotypes wonderful?)

I never dreamed of finding love with a younger girl and I was probably sceptical to say the least at first!
Like most of the people on this site we still have lots of concerns But I've looked long and hard and only see that I'd have pretty much the same concerns with any new love! Will this last? What will people think of us? What does the future hold?....so on.

Heck with it!....I've fallen in love with a Very caring Very loving Very gentle and compassionate young woman who thinks the world of me and I in turn think the world of her! We're happy and very much in love and we have right now which is ALOT more than so many people have going for them in this life!

Oh thats Great!!!!!!!!!!!!

I hope all the best for you.... I feel the same way I am 27 turning 28 in May and he is 44 turning 45 in June... 17 years apart..... and I love hiim more than anything...

great story! i'm glad you have found such a wonderful love. best of love to you two! hope to see you round here often!

thanks EM & Mer!

Think the site is great so far, and the people here seem to have a bond going that I feel honored to have found!

Have been reading on some of both of your's threads and posts.
Along with many of the other members posts. Its nice to see intelligence, experience, wit, & compassion coming out in so many of the members here!

Think I'm gonna like this site....lol

Don

Rolls, that WAS a great story. Congrats on finding happiness and love. B is 25 years older than I am and I love him more than anyone I've ever loved in my entire life. He and I are disgustingly happy together and I wish the same for you always!!

And yeah - this board IS fun, on target and the people that post are genuinely wonderful. (Minus the trolls...we seem to have had quite a few trolls lately.)

Happy

Great story. I'm really happy for you rolls.

I had a random question to throw out to you guys...how long is a good amount of time after someone's gotten divorced to start publicly acknowledging that you are seriously dating? One year? Two years? And after that...when's a good time to move in? I mean I know there aren't any rules printed in stone or anything but I'm interested in your opinions.
We're a couple months away from his 1 year divorce anniversary and people are still being led to believe that we are more casual than we really are (I practically live with him...have my own place but never there). I am trying to find the patience to sit it out as long as possible to make it easier for him and to not pressure him...but how long to wait? We've been together for around a year.

Morgaine...seems like we might have something in common! I'm big into horses. When I found out my OM used to jump competitively we started talking about our experiences with riding and our interest in horses and soon learned it wasn't the only interest we had in common. Anyway, he now own a couple of horses and I help with taking care of them and some training. :p
Did you read Mists of Avalon :p ?

Thanks Happy and Twiggy,

Twiggy,
"how long is a good amount of time after someone's gotten divorced to start publicly acknowledging that you are seriously dating? One year? Two years? And after that...when's a good time to move in? I mean I know there aren't any rules printed in stone or anything but I'm interested in your opinions."

My opinion...lol....when the ink is dry on the divorce signing!!
Well that is if you really want to keep it from smearing!
personally I'd make out in the courtroom in front of her just to show her what she threw away!:D But....sigh you've passed that point dang it! Seriously if he were a widower then I could see some etiquette then, but we're talking about divorce here. for whatever reasons it didn't work both have decided to move on and the courts have spoken! it is ended!

As far as tact or tastefully going about it all, Well in the 1800's it was disgusting even for a widow/widower to even consider another relationship after a marriage ended! mid 1900's it was acceptable,.....2003,.....lol theres only 30 states that are opposed to gay marriages! (leaving 20 undecided) The times they are a changing.

In other words it all depends on who you ask. There will always be someone offended and others that are just too happy for you.
You can please some of the people some of the time..yada yada yada! Personally I sure don't see a public stoning happening anytime soon.

Don

thanks for the words of encouragement rolls. I guess I just need to be a little more patient and what for him to take it to the next level. It wouldn't feel right if things progressed simply because I was putting on the pressure.

hi everyone
i'm new here and must say i am so glad to have finally found this site! it has hel[ed so much to read the posts.
i'll start w/ my relationship. i'm 20, and my OM is 46. i've known him almost 4 yrs. Been together for between 3 and 3.5 years
to make a long story a little shorter.i met him at work, he wad the boss. it started just that i could talk to him so easy. there are not many people i can really talk to. then he after a few months he started asking me to go have a coke w/ him. i refused quite a few times, until he invited me to go w/ another person along. it just kept getting better. he became my best friend. i can't even tell you when it became more then that. it just happened and i am loving it more everyday. he is the best and i love him.
i have one question. (right now) do you guys have the "is this your daughter?" happen? how does he handle it? Basically E says, "no, this is Jessie."
sorry this was so long. I hope to be posting more. :)

I was with Bat a store, he was trying to find something that would age me up a bit! The lady that was helping us was really nice, so I was nice back. When I went to change they stayed behind and began to chat a bit. When I got back the lady left and B turned to me and said...she just mentioned that I have such a sweet daughter! I smirked and said, "So, I guess kissing you right now wouldn't look too good?"

It's funny now but...yes we got that question a lot. What we have noticed though is that the more comfortable the two of you are with it....the more comfortable people around you are. If you maintain a level of confidence and make it seem natural, people tend to pick up on that. As soon as we decided not to worry about it...it seemed easier. People don't ask anymore, I guess cuz looking at us...it's pretty obvious we're not. We have a 22 year gap, in case you were wondering.

B usually lets out a little laugh and politely shakes his head and simply says "no, she's not." That's all he says. People usually get the idea with their second guess.

Not sure if this helps at all.

yeah it does help
i'm just always surprised when people ask this. nobody ever asks my father if i'm his daugther. or asks E about his daughter.
We just had our first weekend out of town and we went to Atlanta & we wern't asked once. I've pretty much decided that those who ask are just looking for some gossip if you will.

You are so right. People only ask when they pretty much already have an idea and just want confirmation. I guess asking "Is that your daughter?" is supposed to sound less intrusive than "Are you actually dating someone outside of your age bracket???" I think this is people sad attempt to be tactful.

just wanted to say welcome to everyone! Twiggy I see you are getting comfortable!! wonderful, there is a GREAT bunch of people here.

Welcome to Morgaine--think I said hello already to you, but welcome again.

Rollsharley--Loved reading your story. Welcome!

And OliveOil, welcome, glad to see another Michigander:D

Welcome OliveOil, & lara thanks for the welcome,:)

Jessie, don't worry about long posts...lol....I don't think I've seen a 2 pager here yet by the same person without added posts. And even then I do believe the folks here would patiently read it if there were one.

As for the "is this your daughter" I have to agree with You & twiggy on that! It seemed to me like the only time we've gotten that, is by people that were pretty sure already.....but just wanted confirmation on it.

But I'm sure with us having a 22 year gap it can be an honest mistake. One that I will gladly reply, No she's not my daughter but thank you for the compliment!:D

Don

I know this is dumb but I'm throwing it out there anyway!? Forgive me.
"Why do you think people REALLY have an issue with the age difference?"

Just curious what you guys think.

Thanks Everyone forbthe welcome.
Twiggy, what I've discovered..And I hope not offend anybody by this... but who has a problem w/ it.. Badically it's women who are between 35 and 50. And my dad. Men basically don't seem to have a problem w/ it. I'm not sure if these women have a problem b/c we're taking "their" men or what. But that has been my observation. Again I'm sorry if you're in that range, but where I am that's the way it seems to be.

I have to saw that's my theory as well. It seems to be the women who have husbands or significant others in that age range that are not cool with it. Maybe the fear of it possibly being their man next. I dunno. But it just seems so stupid. You always hear about guys sticking together on things. Why is it that women are just so stinking mean to one another, there's some unspoken competition amongst us. Maybe this is why I have two good female friends. I remember the one thing I hated about school was how the girls always criticized other girls. "Look what she's wearing? I can't believe she did that!" Blah, blah, blah. What gives? Apparently this carries on through adulthood.

Originally posted by twiggy
It seems to be the women who have husbands or significant others in that age range that are not cool with it.
My two cents:

I just recently got into a confrontation with a group of women (in the restroom of a rather nice restaurant, if you can believe it) that fits in with your theory.

My OM and I were having dinner (I'm 27, he's 52) and I went to the ladies room. On the way to be seated, we passed a tableful of women in their mid-40s/early-50s, and a few of them were in the bathroom with me.

If looks could kill, I would be six feet under right now. :-)

One of them took it upon herself to accuse me of stealing an available older man. I just laughed at her and told her there was no reason she couldn't find herself a 27 year old man.

I don't think she liked me very much. *grin*

Oh, and hey. I'm new here, nice to see everyone. :-)

hello ferretmama, and welcome.

Don

I read this and just HAD to give my 2 cents (as usual). I have actually discussed this with my DAD! His words to me were "Honey, they are pissed that you've stolen one of (puts his fingers to do quotes in the air) "their" men. They don't think you could possibly have anything to offer a man thier age." And that was my DAD saying that! (My dad doesn't like it because it makes HIM feel old. B is a year older than my dad and looks 20 years younger tee hee hee.)

Most men, to B, are like "Right on, man!" But that embarrasses B a little because he thinks it kind of cheapens our relationship to "He's got a hottie!!" when its more like "He's got the woman of his dreams;) !" He he he. Some men, though, are like "Tsk tsk tsk, she'll break your heart..." and are a-holes to me - they'll talk down to this "itty-bitty little girl" until they realize that I am just as intelligent and wordly (if not more, since I'm so open minded) than their wives.

AND, of course, there is the angry, YOUNGER male - who has to act like he can't believe I'd want a man 25 years my senior INSTEAD of him...that I'd want ANYONE instead of him.

ROFL. I could yack about this subject all day long. I'll stop while I'm ahead and just conclude with - Older women who make sour-pusses to us as we deftly "steal" all of their men, are bitter, closed minded witches who probably couldn't KEEP our O.M.'s if they ever even had a chance. B tried to date women his age, but all they wanted to do was go to dinner and dancing and Zzzzzzzzzzzzz and sometimes, sex. With me, B gets a partner who can keep up with him (surfing, snowboarding, kung fu, yard work) in all of his hobbies, loves to be joyful (insted of *****ing about the world today) and wants to have sex more than he is physically able. (He could never cheat on me, I've worn the man out!)

(sigh) So, when sour ole' prune faces ***** at you for "stealing their men" just smile, **** your head to the side, shake it and say "God....it must be AWFUL to be so bitter. I'll be praying for you."

BWAH HA HA HA HA HA

Love,
HAPPY (hyper today)

Originally posted by rollsharley
hello ferretmama, and welcome.

Thanks, Don!

I appreciate the welcome. I've been reading the boards and feel like I 'know' everyone already. :-)

Is it me, or are we all getting a little more heavily monitored on the boards??? I've been getting *** out the yin yang.

Or will yin yang be *** too?

Creepy

"Why do you think people REALLY have an issue with the age difference?"

Good question...I feel that people attack and criticize things they are uneducated about. They probably don't know anyone in an age gap relationship and fear that one day they will be left for a younger woman. Little do these women know (contrary to social stereotypes) that we don't go looking for older married men, then lure them with our seductive ways, and snag them from right under their nose!

What does happen, however, is two people finding common interests in each other, then later develops into a love that would never fathomed months prior. It happens....you can't choose who you fall in love with...if you could life would be so much easier. If D was black, white, Asian, 20, 30, 40, 50, catholic, Buddhist, Mormon...you name it D is D and no one, no race, no age, no religion...etc, etc can change that. It is sad that people can't understand the TRUE meaning of love. People who love with limits and boundaries are uneducated and fear the true capacity of their heart.

Ummmm Is it me, or are we all getting a little more heavily monitored on the boards??? I've been getting *** out the yin yang.

Or will yin yang be *** too?

Creepy

What? monitored by who?

Ha ha ha! That's what I was asking. Monitored by "THEM" or a "SOMEONE" - until recently, I have never had ***'s show up on my post unless I put ***'s in there. Now they are every where! (giggle) Even when the words aren't that bad. It's weird!

Happy

oh really! I never knew th *'s weren't being posted by you guys. I thought you guys were putting them on there....funky.

SHIT


just thought I'd try.

hmmm...works for me.

EM...

I like it that the worst you can think of is Shit. Must not be from the f*ckin big city....(asterisk was mine) ;-)

The IrishKid

LOL - I do have a potty mouth, but thougt I should only write one word instead of the whole phrase I was thinking of.

Let me see:

I typed ****ty.

s-l-u-t-t-y and it came up with ***'s. I SWEAR! (Oh my god, I AM going insane. MAKE THE VOICES STOP!!!!)

Happy (& scared!)

See! See!!!!! It won't let me type ****ty! (s-l-u-t-t-y!!!!) ROFLMAO! Ha ha ha ha ha! OR *****ing! (b-i-t-c-h-i-n-g)

Whew!!! I'm NOT crazy!

Happy (twitch)

maybe you have some sort of vulgar language lock on your computer or something.....strange.

It's just SO funny! I don't NEED to say those words, but it's just so DAMN funny. Ha ha ha ha!

Happy

Pray to the ******************************** and ask them to F****** disappear!

Finally,

A place where I can try out my handy dandy cussword de-coder ring:D :D :D

Oh big brother protect my virgin eyes from this torture!.....oh and can ya get some of the smut e-mails out of my yahoo mail while your at it?????:D

Don

you guys crack me up! :D Stop the censorship MADNESS!?!?!