Once things fall apart completely...

Then what???


Building things back together with the same "materials" isn't the answer is it???

The friendship is in tact, but I'm in need of serious reconstruction.

The whole relationship was all in my head, one BIG misunderstanding between good friends.

It's the worst misunderstanding of my life. But, I'm as resilliant as a ****roach.

what exactly is that you need to know?
can you share a bit more what its the problem currently making waves in your young life?
Maybe we can help more
Adri

when I've had a relationship end...I watch things fall apart emotionally, physically, etc.

Then I would BUILD MYSELF UP and see what I've got to work with. I guess the "materials" was just a metaphor.

My point is building myself back up just won't work. So, I don't know just what I'm saying. Never mind.

What's the alternative to building yourself back up?

Staying flat on the floor, indefinitely?

Seriously, it all depends what you mean by building yourself back up.

Sure, rebuilding confidence and self-esteem are important. Forgiving yourself for any mistakes that you might have made along the way is important. Taking responsibility for your half of it, and not taking responsibility for all of it, are important.

But maybe the most important thing of all is trying to figure out what you could do, or think or envision differently the next time around - so what you re-build after each go-round is a bit stronger and better than the last version.

well-I appreciate the people who are trying to talk about recovery. He made promises, he continually lied. HE withheld physical contact with a promise it would happen in the future. I was ready to believe him because I was convinced our thing was deeper-you know,spiritual. He called it that too. I believed him. I introducedhim to a co-worker of mine...his age. They moved in together within a week. Now they are in love. She was my friend. The betrayal has been unbearable. I'm learning.

Suzan, what a horrible thing to go through...and especially with two close people. But close doesn't mean good, and you had the proof of it. It hurts a lot, I know, it hurts to know that there are people able to be that cruel to you, but now you know, and it's good you knew this before going any further on your feelings for this man and this woman.
It's a good thing you got rid of them and now you are free to continue your life without that garbage in it. The pain will go away, you know that, and until there, be good to yourself.
http://www.terravista.pt/IlhadoMel/7939/rosita.gif