Dealing with Manipulation

A buddy of mine who is in an age-gap relationship (he's 52, she's 42) for ten years has been talking with me about the frustrations he feels in the marriage. When he described the coversations they had, I recognized patterns of manipulation that he didn't realize. He just knew that every time they talked about their problems, he felt terrible and GUILTY, even though he didn't think he had done or said anything wrong. I pulled out an old ear-marked book, and I read him the

Assertive Bill of Rights

Read this and give me some feedback.

Scott


1. You have the right to judge your own behavior, thoughts, and emotions, and to take the responsibility for their initiation and consequences upon yourself.

2. You have the right to offer no reasons or excuses for justifying your behavior.

3. You have the right to judge if you are reponsible for finding solutions to other peoples problems.

4. You have the right to change your mind.

5. You have the right to make mistakes and be responsible for them.

6. You have the right to say " I don't Know"

7. You have the right to be independent of the goodwill of others before coping with them.

8. You have the right to be illogical in making decisions.

9. You have the right to say "I don't understand"

10. You have the right to say " I don't care"


"You have the right to say no without feeling quilty".

Good Stuff...

Here's one from me..

11. You have the right to be human and make mistakes. Because you're only human. You have the right to forgive yourself for those mistakes.

That's great, msc. But I prefer to follow the advice and theory of the GOD of marriages, Al Bundy. Then find my remote, tuck my hand in my pants, and enjoy a marathon of "Psycho Dad".

"Women....You can't live with them.....end of story"

"Women....You can't live with them.....end of story"

Chosen,

I don't think ALL of us girls are that bad. I know my three cousins (all girls) would stoop to manipulate any man they could just to say that they slept with them.

But on the other hand..........look at me. I would never think of manipulating someone like that. Even if I do it on accident to where I didn't mean to, I would apologise right away.

Crystal