frontrose 10-29-2003, 08:56 PM Hey,
Just wondering what you guys think about this one - and be honest:
Okay, (I posted this attached to my other post but thought i'd post it again).
the guy that asked me out friday night said in an indirect way to me a couple of days later that his insecurities were coming out (i guess by asking me out). So, what the heck does that mean? Is he just saying that because he got turned down? Or does he really mean that it was a true mistake to ask me out? I guess only he can answer that...I'm just confused. It almost felt like rejection in return. I don't know if I regret turning him down or not. I just don't know anything tonight...LOL
And now I'm thinking about him...wish i wasn't.
TheChosen1 11-04-2003, 03:44 PM Maybe he regrets asking you out not because it was a mistake, per sa. Maybe he feels that you would not be comfortable with someone who is so much older than you. Just a posibility.
PinkPanther_04 11-04-2003, 03:49 PM *pointing up*
What he said.
It might be that he regrets asking because he was turned down. Or he doesn't think you'd be interested (because of the age issue perhaps) and feels like a jerk for asking.
Quick question for you: if you're still thinking about him and going over all this in your head it must mean something to you. What is the harm in going to dinner with him?
Spunkasaurus 11-05-2003, 05:29 PM Didn't read your other thread but going on what you say here - he asked you out, got rejected, said his insecurities were starting to surface.
That appears extremely straight forward.
Asking someone out is HARD. He's admitting that he likes you and wants to know what you think about HIM.
Before the asking out occurs - the man will try to (generally) sum up the situation and whether he is interesting enough a proposition (taking in a lot of factors) for the woman to accept. In this state there is confidence versus insecurity.
If he musters enough confidence, (convincing himself he's okay and you *may* like him) he asks you out.
You reject him.
Confidence shattered - insecurities rise to the surface yelling "I told you so, sucker!"
His reaction seems pretty straight forward to me...
TheChosen1 11-05-2003, 05:53 PM Originally posted by PinkPanther_04
*pointing up*
What he said.
It might be that he regrets asking because he was turned down. Or he doesn't think you'd be interested (because of the age issue perhaps) and feels like a jerk for asking.
Quick question for you: if you're still thinking about him and going over all this in your head it must mean something to you. What is the harm in going to dinner with him?
I agree with Pinkie. It's not like he told you to drop everything so that you two can go to Vegas and have a quickie wedding ceremony at a drive thru window performed by an Elvis impersonator.
I think you should have a talk with this guy and let him know that you're comfortable with the age difference. And if you would like to go out with him, go for it, and come back to let us know how'd it go.
PinkPanther_04 11-05-2003, 05:57 PM I thought she was UNcomfortable with the age difference. Wasn't that the problem?
TheChosen1 11-06-2003, 03:05 AM Originally posted by PinkPanther_04
I thought she was UNcomfortable with the age difference. Wasn't that the problem?
Is she?
I thought she's dated an older guy before and said that she had the hots for the guy who asked her out. :confused:
PinkPanther_04 11-06-2003, 07:24 AM Yeah, she did, and it sounds like she likes the guy, but she said she doesn't want to deal with the b.s. she got the first time around.
This is goofy. We're talking about her like she isn't here...where is she, though?
Frontrose, come back! We're confused. :confused:
frontrose 11-10-2003, 11:41 PM I'm so sorry I haven't replied to your thread. My bad. My answer is: yeah, I do kind of have the hots for him. But my gosh, a 26 year age difference is huge. huge. My friends would look at me like I'm crazy. My parents would disown me. Too much of a mess. So I don't think I'm gonna do anything about my little crush. thanks for all the advice guys! Peace out :cool:
TheChosen1 11-14-2003, 09:33 PM Originally posted by frontrose
I'm so sorry I haven't replied to your thread. My bad. My answer is: yeah, I do kind of have the hots for him. But my gosh, a 26 year age difference is huge. huge. My friends would look at me like I'm crazy. My parents would disown me. Too much of a mess. So I don't think I'm gonna do anything about my little crush. thanks for all the advice guys! Peace out :cool:
So let's say you accept this guy's invitation and everything works out fine. Who would be dating him? You? Your friends? Your parents? It doesn't matter. If you're over 18, and I'm sure you are, it's what you feel in YOUR heart and it shouldn't matter what anyone else thinks. My off/on YW is the same way. It's been said that I am either the same age or very close to the age of her father and because of that, she have chosen for us not to date but remain "close" friends. Yet, her heart tells her that she will always want us to be together and she is always asking me to come spend time with her. We've both dated other people but she still calls me. And trust me, if I tell her about another woman whom I'm friends with or dating, she will always give me the enormous interrogation about that woman.
So unless you want to be like my current on/off YW and constantly ask yourself. "WHAT IF?", you should forget what other people are saying or would probably say and listen to your heart.
KEEP US POSTED!!!
SomeNightSW 11-14-2003, 09:36 PM Chosen,
Do you want your YW to be on or off or are you happy with on/off?
TheChosen1 11-14-2003, 09:43 PM Originally posted by SomeNightSW
Chosen,
Do you want your YW to be on or off or are you happy with on/off?
Good question SNSW,
I'm pretty happy with our relationship that way, yet sometimes I find myself caring more for her.
Just two weeks ago, she called me in the middle of the night telling me that she was stranded away from her apartment. I was half sleep when I was talking to her, at some points going to sleep on the phone, and she just told me that she would call a cab to get home. I asked her to call me when she get home, even if I'm asleep. But I never heard from her and she never answered any of her phones. I was worried to no end until she finally returned my call 2 days later.
But as far as a dating relationship is concerned, like frontrose, she's too concerned about what other people are thinking of us. But everytime we're together, we're in seperable.
SomeNightSW 11-14-2003, 09:49 PM Why didn't you saddle up and go rescue her?
PinkPanther_04 11-14-2003, 09:58 PM Um, yeah Chosen. It's pretty obvious she was upset that you didn't go get her and take her home.
SomeNightSW 11-14-2003, 10:01 PM Might be a reason he didn't saddle up.
TheChosen1 11-14-2003, 10:16 PM Originally posted by PinkPanther_04
Um, yeah Chosen. It's pretty obvious she was upset that you didn't go get her and take her home.
Not exactly, Pinkie. She was constantly working doubles at work and could not return my calls.
To be quite honest with you, Cali is a rough place. A couple of years ago, a very sweet coworker of mine turned up missing and her body was found days later. In that time that I didn't hear from A, I kept thinking of that and, needless to say, it brought tears to my eyes. I felt that if anything would have happened to A, I would NEVER forgive myself for not bringing her home that night.
But anyway Pinkie, thanks for your post. As we speak, I'm trying to reach her to spend the weekend with her before having my surgery. But, as usual, she's at work and her cell phone is in her locker.
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