Polygamous Relationships

Has anyone ever been involved in a polygamous long term relationship?

I'm in one right now.

O.K. I'm embaressed.......what is polygamous????

Originally posted by rollsharley
Um........More than one partner Bella!

OH!!!! SH*#$@*nap!!!!! Got it.....Well, no I'm not.

No interest here either. :D



LMAO @ Bella!! :p

I'm glad you asked Bella because I didn't know either lol.

I'm not in one either

YEP!!! Thats ME!!!! The Blonde who never fails to ask the silly questions or to embaress herself in front of all the ageless crew!!!

LOL. I was just laughing about the "OH!!!! SH*#$@*nap!!!!!" comment, not at your question. :D

I wouldn't be interested in one myself. But there are those who say you can't have everything you need in one person (although I think some really happy people here would strongly disagree with that view).

Really nice photo of you, Bella.

Would Rosie L. and Rosie R. count:p ;)

Originally posted by BellaLove
YEP!!! Thats ME!!!! The Blonde who never fails to ask the silly questions or to embaress herself in front of all the ageless crew!!!

That's okay, BellaLove. We're still loving the day when you asked us whether Chicken Of The Sea was tuna, chicken, grilled cheese, or potted ham. :D

I knew what that word meant but I wasn't going to say anything.......LOL

I discussed that matter once before in the past but I don't think I need to bring it back to life. http://users.telenet.be/eforum/emoticons4u/mad/1441.gif Besides, I don't feel like getting lynched online since it's so close to the holidays.

So I'll just state that YES, been there & done that....then got a divorce.http://users.telenet.be/eforum/emoticons4u/mad/boese038.gif

i don't know....polygamy is working alright for me, thus far. i am allowed to casually see/date other people, as long as it doesn't develop into something serious.... and ive used the privilege a couple of times. I am not sure if he's used the privilege yet or not...

Maybe this is counterproductive? i don't know.....so far, it seems to work. It is definitely not a confining relationship.....

But, then yet, it isn't like I have been seeing tom for that long...i tihnk it has been..four months.....wow, i guess that is sort of a long time.

i am keeping an open mind about it. it is good to try new things, yes?

Originally posted by TheChosen1
That's okay, BellaLove. We're still loving the day when you asked us whether Chicken Of The Sea was tuna, chicken, grilled cheese, or potted ham. :D

I knew what that word meant but I wasn't going to say anything.......LOL



WTF!!!!! Thats it Chosen....I've just 'bout had it with you!!!

Put 'um up!!!!

http://smilies.crowd9.com/cwm/sfa3/jinkuhoudouken.gif

Originally posted by BellaLove
WTF!!!!! Thats it Chosen....I've just 'bout had it with you!!!

Put 'um up!!!!

http://smilies.crowd9.com/cwm/sfa3/jinkuhoudouken.gif
WHY DO YOU WANT TO TREAT ME SO BAD?http://pages.prodigy.net/rogerlori1/emoticons/smiley16_surprise.gif

Don't mean to split hairs here, but polygamy generally refers to more than one husband or wife at a time. If it's not a marital relationship it's usually referred to as polyamorous.

If it's possible to dig up any archives from here that involve Rhiannon (or another name she used to go by was Roamin' in the Gloamin'), you will find a veritable treasure trove of discussion about the poly theme. I know peeps from the other side, Polly, Bears Angel and some others will remember Rhiannon.

Just thinking out loud to my keyboard.

Different strokes for different folks I guess. I think it's more prevalent than people realise. Maybe just something people are reluctant to talk about, and would rather keep to themselves?

Gillian

The thing is, it's a matter of degree and choice and ultimately, social status. In a monogamous relationship, by definition there is only one sexual partner at a time. Love is not required.

But when we 'love' several people who happen to be of the opposite gender, we separate them first into categories of platonic and romantic. Then we separate them further into various levels of intimacy, then short-term and long-term. Whatever the basis, it's still a matter of degrees. (Of course, there are those who throw everything into every relationship, but with only one person at a time. I stopped doing that when I realized I was running out of time, and I had spent too much time trying to make something out of very little. Does that make sense?)

So, as I understand it, polyamorous refers to loving more than one person romantically at the same time.

I think two good questions are: "Why is it necessary to love only one person romantically at a time?" and also, "If you're open to seeing more than one person at a time, when is the 'right' time to become exclusive?"

Well, I don't think the question was referring to being married to more than one person at once.....it could have been referring to loving more than one person at once.

Why can monogamy refer to marriage or non-marriage, but polygamy can refer to only marriage? doesn't seem to make sense to me....

the greek root "gam" means marriage, actually, but that doesn't stop people from using the word monogamy to refer to non-marital relationships as well.

I would say that anything not monogamous would be polygamous in nature. You know, in the animal world/nature polygamy refers to having more than one mate sexually, so that is the sense i use it in.....

There are books on this....about theories about whether humans are not so naturally mongogamous or not.

here, read this linky:

http://atheism.about.com/library/books/full/aafprMythMonogamy.htm?terms=go

Now, I do agree that there is more than one right person out there for me...and I do think that if i met someone more perfect that i would probably be very tempted to leave tom...but, then yet, who knows what i would do; it hasn't happened yet. I don't know if it would be good to know whether tom has used his privileges yet.....tom says that it is probably better not to disclose "privilege uses." And, i think he could be right about this...because then you get these horrible thoughts in your head about who the helll he is with and where and when, and it isn't good for all of that to fester inside.

Now, to answer your question further, I would have to say that you should not pursue any secondary relationships if they take away from your quality time with your primary relationship. It isn't like you can maintain secondary relationships as well as with your primary because, otherwise, it would take away from the primary relationship. You have to be respectful, above all things, to your primary relationship....ya know? it is sort of a respect/etiquette thingy.

i have to go now...i would explain further, only my sister is standing behind me, *****ing about me hogging the internet time.

toodleloo.

When my OM and I started dating we had a "deal" that we could see other people because I had just gotten divorced and he wasn't ready to be settled down yet. We dated this way for a little over a year before I finally got to a point where I couldn't stand to think of him with anyone else. I never took advantage of our "deal" and I knew he was but I tried to keep my feelings about it to myself. We decided this past January to be "exclusive" and I wouldn't change the way we did things for anything in this world....it may have been painful but I feel like our relationship is stronger and more honest because of it. We never had to hide anything from one another...and when the time was right for both of us we made a decision to be together.