special K
12-17-2003, 12:31 AM
...or at least help things along a whole lot.
It's been a while since I've posted. Frankly, I have just been trying to recover from the breakup with my ym back in early October. We had been together 3+ years, and he was not only my lover, but my best friend. I pretty much cried for the first 4 weeks nonstop; then he told me he was "dating" someone (a rebound chick or what?) , and that she was his age (another kick in the stomach), and then I actually saw them together (wanted to die). I cried for another 4 weeks.
BUT....in the midst of all that crying, a great guy from ageless and I started chatting online. He had recently parted ways with his long term lady, so we whined to each other over the internet, and then on the phone for a few weeks. I got the play by play of his stuff, and he got mine. Because of all that, we were pretty much transparent with each other from the start, and a real friendship developed. We both knew that given the timing, we were in "rebound" land ourselves, and purposed to just grow a friendship. It grew, and it was fun. He actually had me LAUGHING about my ex, and soon, I stopped crying!
One night on the phone he just said, "we need to just get out of our lives for a while and leave town....if you could go anywhere, where would it be?" I responded, "Rome". He said, "let's go to Rome !! I'm serious, let's do it!!!"
Within a few days we had decided that Rome would be too hard with such short notice...so we went to New York City instead !!
Yep, I'm here to tell you, we just got back on Sunday. He lives in the Midwest, and I in the Pacific Northwest, so I miss him...but it was all sooo worth it. For one week I totally forgot about my ex ym. We had the BEST time, pretty much due to this great guy. He is adorable, a true gentleman, a sweetheart, and soooo fun. I haven't laughed like that in a long time. We saw two Broadway shows ("42nd Street" and "The Producers"), ice skated at Rockefeller Center, saw the sites, ate at some wonderful places, and most importantly ... just enjoyed our time together-away from any drama back home. We have a 17+ year age gap (which is pretty much perfect, I found)...and he said the cutest thing about that, "So what....you were driving when I was born, big deal..."
He was my godsend, and I think I his (I don't know, you , was I?).
We connected in an amazing way without any pretense of going to find romance or to meet someone we had fallen in love with online. We just went to realize a great friendship in person, and we did that...with a little more :)
Anyway, ladies....may I introduce you to Spatula....he's only posted a couple of times here, but I hope he'll be back to visit now. He is a gem.
Really, he is my friend for life now.... hmmmmm, at least that :D
So, I learned that to mend a broken heart, or to start the healing process on the path quickly you've got to change your surroundings..."get out of town" if possible. Do something you've never done before with someone fun and kind. Laugh at your past (and your ex) instead of dwelling on it (or them) with a little irreverance. And find someone who gives genuine hugs when they're needed, and wants a few in return.
I am back to being the "me" I once was. Thanks, Spatula, I owe it all to you. Now, about that trip of yours to Oregon.....
Hugs to all of you who have pm'd me and supported me and just been great friends. You're all the best. And, ummmm....my belief in the inherent beauty of ym/ow relationships has been restored! A friend is so good to find when your heart is hurting...
It's been a while since I've posted. Frankly, I have just been trying to recover from the breakup with my ym back in early October. We had been together 3+ years, and he was not only my lover, but my best friend. I pretty much cried for the first 4 weeks nonstop; then he told me he was "dating" someone (a rebound chick or what?) , and that she was his age (another kick in the stomach), and then I actually saw them together (wanted to die). I cried for another 4 weeks.
BUT....in the midst of all that crying, a great guy from ageless and I started chatting online. He had recently parted ways with his long term lady, so we whined to each other over the internet, and then on the phone for a few weeks. I got the play by play of his stuff, and he got mine. Because of all that, we were pretty much transparent with each other from the start, and a real friendship developed. We both knew that given the timing, we were in "rebound" land ourselves, and purposed to just grow a friendship. It grew, and it was fun. He actually had me LAUGHING about my ex, and soon, I stopped crying!
One night on the phone he just said, "we need to just get out of our lives for a while and leave town....if you could go anywhere, where would it be?" I responded, "Rome". He said, "let's go to Rome !! I'm serious, let's do it!!!"
Within a few days we had decided that Rome would be too hard with such short notice...so we went to New York City instead !!
Yep, I'm here to tell you, we just got back on Sunday. He lives in the Midwest, and I in the Pacific Northwest, so I miss him...but it was all sooo worth it. For one week I totally forgot about my ex ym. We had the BEST time, pretty much due to this great guy. He is adorable, a true gentleman, a sweetheart, and soooo fun. I haven't laughed like that in a long time. We saw two Broadway shows ("42nd Street" and "The Producers"), ice skated at Rockefeller Center, saw the sites, ate at some wonderful places, and most importantly ... just enjoyed our time together-away from any drama back home. We have a 17+ year age gap (which is pretty much perfect, I found)...and he said the cutest thing about that, "So what....you were driving when I was born, big deal..."
He was my godsend, and I think I his (I don't know, you , was I?).
We connected in an amazing way without any pretense of going to find romance or to meet someone we had fallen in love with online. We just went to realize a great friendship in person, and we did that...with a little more :)
Anyway, ladies....may I introduce you to Spatula....he's only posted a couple of times here, but I hope he'll be back to visit now. He is a gem.
Really, he is my friend for life now.... hmmmmm, at least that :D
So, I learned that to mend a broken heart, or to start the healing process on the path quickly you've got to change your surroundings..."get out of town" if possible. Do something you've never done before with someone fun and kind. Laugh at your past (and your ex) instead of dwelling on it (or them) with a little irreverance. And find someone who gives genuine hugs when they're needed, and wants a few in return.
I am back to being the "me" I once was. Thanks, Spatula, I owe it all to you. Now, about that trip of yours to Oregon.....
Hugs to all of you who have pm'd me and supported me and just been great friends. You're all the best. And, ummmm....my belief in the inherent beauty of ym/ow relationships has been restored! A friend is so good to find when your heart is hurting...