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Thread: Ageless Love Family Reunion Thread

  1. #1
    Bella's Avatar
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    Ageless Love Family Reunion Thread

    Hi there!

    So... a few of us were chatting on Facebook the other day and someone mentioned how fun it would be to have everyone gather here for old time's sake. This weekend is it, a touch back, update kind of thing.

    Hopefully lots will show up, and I hope people spread the word to those who they may still have contact with privately.

    So here goes.

    I'm Frances. My S/O is David. He's 28 years younger than me. I joined back before it was even Ageless, back in the old Lovestories.com days. We'd met, playing an online game, he lived on the east coast, I lived in the middle of the country. I was newly divorced, he was just going to turn 18. He was just another of the younger guys I hung out with in game, we just talked a lot. When he started talking about more, I first got maternal, then got upset, then angry, then scared out of my wits. The first time we met in person, honestly, was just to get this silly fantasy over with so we could both move on.

    We're still together, still doing great.

    I'm working for a Medical equipment company, and doing part time home nursing on the weekends. He's a medication aide in an assisted living, and in September, after what feels like a long time of part time school, will be an RN.

    My baby girl moved out of the house this year, is in college, and is engaged to an awesome kid.

    The grandbabies are wonderful, the youngest is 8. That doesn't seem possible.

    I am still grateful for Ageless and for the people I met here. Some who were a great support, some who I could be there for in return, and even those who just strengthened my resolve not to let the ******* get me down.

    I'm turning 59 this Summer, he's turning 31. When we started, I said I would be happy with 5 years of being loved like that, as it was more than most people ever got. It's been more than twice that, and no signs of stopping. I'll never claim our life is perfect, nobody's is, and anyone who claims otherwise is lying. School stress, work stress, life stress, it all makes it more work. But it's the healthiest relationship I know of, because even when things flare up, we calm down and work it out. We had one bump, early on, after he'd moved here. We went to a counselor for a couple of months, who said that we communicated better than almost any couple he'd worked with. Not a real surprise, when for months, talking was all we had. I think we interested the guy. He actually had us come back a couple of times for free, just so he could see how things were working out. It really helped me deal with the drop jaw look, and how to handle the negative judgement type people. David got help working through the fears. He had had the realization that I was most likely going to be gone while he was still a fairly young age, and he was having a tough time dealing with that. He finally made his mind up that sure, we could break up, but how dumb would that be? So you throw away someone you love just because you're scared of the time you're going to lose them, so you lose them now, and maybe never find that in your life again?

    It was hard for me during that time, and a couple of really wonderful women from here were my rocks then. People out here in the "real world" weren't so much. As one put it, "really, what did you expect was going to happen"

    But that was long ago, and he's never had second thoughts since.

    He's my best friend, my lover, my partner. I tend to be more flighty and impulsive, he tends to be more methodical, forgets to have fun. We balance each other out. I pull him out of his comfort zone, he steers me back into line. As my niece put it one day, "he might be a lot younger than you, but he sure is a lot older than you". Made me laugh.

    I do admit to feeling a smidge of relief the day he turned 25, and then again the day he turned 30. The silver hairs he has scattered in his dark hair don't hurt either.

    Anyway, that's my story.

    I hope everyone adds to it, and I hope to see a lot of familiar names turn up here. Lots of people here have touched my life and whether for good or for irritation (and sometimes anger), I wouldn't have missed it.

  2. #2
    whiterose's Avatar
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    Welcome back, Bella. Thanks for updating us on how things are going. Looking forward to others dropping by as well.

  3. #3
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    Hey Bella So glad you got this thing rolling! I stay connected with some of my AL friends on FB but I'm rarely around here anymore. I'll give a little background and update as well!

    My AL "how we met" story isn't that much different than Bella's lol....Chris and I met in an online game in 2005. I was new to gaming and had joined with a few r/l friends, all of whom were at least mid 20's to my age (then 35) so when Chris joined our guild and interacted like everyone else, I never even thought he might be as young as he turned out to be (he was 3 months shy of his 18th birthday when we became friends). Unlike Bella, I was still with my husband, although we had been having problems for a couple of years and gaming had been my escape before Chris ever came into the picture. But yes, developing that deep connection with another person did push me towards leaving that relationship. It wasn't done lightly and I went to counseling by myself (husband would not go) because I knew I was getting the emotional support and interaction from someone online that I wanted from my husband. Plus I was extremely distraught about developing feelings for a teenager. After several months, I drove 11 hours to meet him. It was awkward, exciting, scary and most importantly, just as wonderful in r/l as our online interactions had been.

    Chris and I have had a very fulfilling relationship. He is 17 1/2 years younger than I am and we have been together now for more than 8 1/2 years. Like Bella said - it has been WORK! I struggled a LOT with the age difference at first, and we broke up early on a couple of times for very short periods of time while we were still in an LDR. We stayed in an LDR for almost 5 years - that was very tough but I needed time to recover from my marriage and I was a little hard on him about making sure he had a job/career before he moved down, but I did not want to fall into a supporting/caretaker role, which is kind of my own personal M/O to the point of co-dependency. It caused a few different kinds of bumps for us, but ultimately, he went to dealer school and now has an amazing career as a poker dealer lol. It may sound odd, but it fits so well with what we both wanted, which was to actually get to spend quality time together - I worried that I would be winding down my career and he would just be starting his and we wouldn't get that. So now, he is able to work 3 days a week, makes great money, and we have lots of free time because I am now working 3 days a week as well! It's taken some time to get to this point, but it's pretty awesome now! For example: We are headed to the beach on the 9th for a few days - woot!

    Again, our life is a bit different from some - he works an hour and 45 min away from home, stays 2 nights a week with another AG dealer couple in Jacksonville (she is about 12-13 years older and they just had a little baby girl) and I get 3 days a week to myself. Which I need. I've learned that without some down time I am really not a good partner. My family has always been supportive of that about me, but until Chris, none of my intimate partners were very understanding and I pushed myself to be in situations that made me feel smothered and resentful. And it was not some instant perfection with Chris either. We had some MAJOR problems that resulted in us needing some SERIOUS counseling. We both made mistakes - he did some REALLY dumb and hurtful things that tested my personal limits and I put some pressures on him that were unfair based on my previous relationship errors. It has been a MESS at times ...but throughout ALL of it, the one thing that has never wavered is our love. It sounds corny but it's true. We just really love each other. We have fun together, we enjoy our life together and when we have problems, we work through them together.

    I am a FIRM believer that it was our start online that has helped us the most. As Bella said - all we had at first was that. Talking...and we would talk for HOURS. And hours....and hours. Nowadays I am sure we talk a lot less, that's just the way it has evolved. But we still talk WAY more than I ever have with any other intimate partner and we are still able to come back to that and really talk through things any time we have problems. I feel completely comfortable and content these days with that part of our life. I still have moments where I get worried about the future, but at this point, this is the longest relationship of MY adult life and by far the healthiest.

    I hope to hear from some of my AL friends this weekend! I may not need the support like I did in those early years...but I love reading updates, seeing where people are these days and just reconnecting with the wonderful people who helped through some pretty dark days all those years ago!
    Last edited by eponavet; 06-07-2014 at 11:10 AM.
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    ~ You are a child of the Universe, no less than the trees and the stars. You have a right to be here, and whether or not it is clear to you, no doubt the Universe is unfolding as it should ~



  4. #4
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    What Bella said lol.

    Yeah, hey everyone!
    I'm Lynn, and my wonderful guy is Streff, and we first came here 10 years (11? maybe lol) ago.
    When we met he was 19 and I was 36, he was friends with my eldest daughter's fiancée (they didn't last), and I really thought our obviously growing attraction was inappropriate and impossible. But he's persistent, and so in panic I turned to the internet to see if I could help myself understand this ridiculous situation I had gotten myself in...and instead of ridicule and contempt which I had expected, I found acceptance, reassurance, encouragement and friendships that have lasted ever since <3
    Like Bella said, I admit to being overjoyed when he turned 30, and we've certainly had our ups and downs, mainly due to my health issues and the knock on financial effects. Neither of our families were too happy at first, but ten years on we've just been away for a weeks holiday with all my family, and they all love him now
    We keep meaning to get married one day, but whether we will ever get around to it, I don't know. If it was free we'd do it tomorrow lol, but there always seems other priorities financially, and we're perfectly happy as we are. I said at the start I'd be happy with however long this lasted, as I really didn't know how long it would work, but here we are, still crazy about each other and not looking like it's fading anytime soon!
    I miss all my friends here, I really don't have any relationship issues any more so stopped hanging out, but I'm sooo looking forward to hearing everyone's updates
    eponavet, whiterose, Bella and 7 others like this.
    If it was easy, everyone would be doing it.
    (OW)47(YM)30, 11yrs together and happier every day

  5. #5
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    Hi (((All))) LTNS

    Well, I don't even know how to explain my story...a lot of zigs and zags to say the least!
    Like the other ladies here, I first came to AG in 2001 b/c, when I fell for a ym..I thought I was losing my mind.
    I was 41 and teaching ballet at both a university and pre-professional students at a studio/company in ID.
    In retrospect, in my case, I WAS losing my mind..eek!
    I was a single mother to a 6 year old daughter, in a new town, where I knew no-one, outside of work, and was overwhelmed between my child's needs, classes, choreography, rehearsals, and performances.
    All that was around me were university students, parents of my younger students, married professors, crazy professors, etc..in this small college town. I was overwhelmed and lonely.
    I met Griff at a local hangout...he was this big, good looking guy, divorced with 2 small kids. I thought he was in his 30's, which still bothered me, so it took him a while before he told me his real age.
    When I found out his age, I freaked out, took to the internet, found AG and saw, thank god, at least I wasn't alone.
    Everything settled down, no-one in our world, besides close family, thought twice about our age difference and the day to day was really beautiful.
    He was a very cut and dry sort of person, sort of military-esque, and I needed that stability in my life and for my daughter.....my work schedule was insane!
    I loved him, he loved me and my daughter (his kids lived with their mom and we rarely saw them but he did his best for them and was responsible)..we married in the summer of 2003.
    For a while, everything was great. We even did the Oprah show on an episode about ow/ym lol. We were the "poster children" for how well AG relationships can work lol.
    It started to change though...he began to resent my job and the hours I spent working. He also hated my work, and passion, for animals..especially the elephants that were such a big part of my life since my days dancing with Ringling Brothers Circus (of horrors). He was about a year old during that chapter of my life...yikes!
    So, to sum it up, pretty much everything that he loved about me, in reality, he came to despise.
    On my end, I never really did get comfortable with our age difference. Yes, I looked young for my age, and certainly, acted like a child (still do lol) but I think all women have issues with their bodies and growing older..being a dancer, those issues are magnified I think. From a very early age, we are looking into a mirror, being critiqued, and told we are "getting old" at around age 16/17 and our careers are completely over by our mid 30's in most cases.
    Fast forward to March 2007.
    I had been struggling at work, I was so tired all of the time, my back was killing me, and my knee ripped to pieces in class which really had me laid up.
    In the stillness of being at home..I finally really paid attention to how he'd talk to me. His strong convictions at age 22, at age 27 turned into downright bullying and worse! The things he said to my daughter about me (by then, they were the best of friends) were awful! He told her so many things that should have remained between a husband and wife!
    In his defense, b/c I was always working, I was glad that he was there for my daughter and that they got along so well.Just didn't realize that a lot of that bond they shared was their anger at me. An anger he fostered in her with the things he said ...and an anger I am still struggling with to this day. She is 19 years old now.
    2007 was one HE** of a year...
    Broken knee, my back finally gave out, and I had this angry man screaming at me all of the time. I actually locked myself in the bathroom to try and get some peace.
    4 days before my emergency back surgery...I asked him to leave and he did.
    Probably not the best timing b/c I didn't think how difficult it would be to heal from that surgery and handle an angry 12 year old daughter alone but..all I could think is that I needed to heal in peace.
    During this time, if not for a certain circle of ladies here on AG, and one token man lol (Fred), I don't know if I'd have made it through. You guys and that blog I started saved my life!
    I have never seen Griff again, we were divorced via the mail. See ya!
    I have had my up's and down's..went to Bulgaria with Romeo (yes, that is his real name) in 2008 and while it wasn't romance..we are still great friends today. I am going back there soon to see everyone.
    Then, in 2009, I was diagnosed with SLE Lupus, (no wonder I was always so tired) and it was a struggle to get my symptoms under control but, for the most part, most days, I am ok.
    In Jan of 2011, I went to South India to be with "my" elephants, came back from India to have surgery on my leg, compressed nerve in my right calve, got MERSA 2 weeks later, spent some time in the hospital and had a 2cnd surgery to clean out the infection, and was back in India in Sept 2011.
    I might fall but I will **** sure get back up!
    In 2012, I went down to Florida to help my mom, she died last August
    Now? Who knows, I quit teaching full time a few years ago but I still teach ballet workshops and intensives anywhere and everywhere but..my main focus is on the highly endangered Asian/Indian elephants both in captivity here in this country as well as the captive, and wild, eles, in their homelands.
    Strong stomach is required b/c you see some really horrible things with the elephants and the people but..totally worth it. This life of service to them raises me up. Hard to put into words and, for me, obviously, that's saying a lot lol
    My little family of animals (3 macaws, 4 rats, 3 cats, 1 iguana,,and whatever else walked through the door lol) has dwindled down to just Luka, my 14 year old dog. He's still doing alright but is showing his age a little more every day.
    I haven't been in a relationship in years and, for me, that works. It really does.
    I never did like answering to anyone else nor do I want to deal with rising to an occasion when I am not feeling well..not to mention whatever issues "he" would bring to the table...nope.
    I am SO happy to see that so many of you are still in happy relationships with your ym. Or if your not..happiness is what I wish for you no matter what happy is to you.
    Family, friends, dancers,and those elephants is a full enough life for me. Magical even.
    Ok, seriously, how many actually read this entire thing??? Hahaha
    And, I only touched on the highlights
    Bright Blessings,
    TD

  6. #6
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    Ups and Downs

    Where to start, where to start.
    Some years ago, okay many years ago, when I was 32 I became involved with an 18-year-old man. We met because we lived in a tiny town, and he lived across the street. People in small, country towns can be rather judgmental and love to gossip. Therefore, I had kept this relationship a secret for six months by the time I arrived at this website. I didn't know at the time how long or if the relationship would last, and I was pretty much convinced that there was something wrong with me. People in my town made awful comments, for example "off the school bus and into your bed, huh?". Of course that was hurtful, and I felt like I had done something I should be ashamed of.
    After I came to Ageless, I found it was a wealth of support and advice and friendship. That young man and I ended up staying together for about nine years, and the reason we broke up had nothing to do with our ages. We had seven really good years together, and then there at the end things just started falling apart. I wouldn't trade the first seven years for anything though.
    After that breakup, which left me pretty much emotionally devastated, I started talking to someone online and over the phone that I had known for a few years. A few months into that, I found out he was married. So....decided that I thought maybe it was best to be on my own for a while, maybe even a long while, maybe even forever. I am, luckily, one of those women that do not mind being alone. I had four children to keep me company. I'm not certain if I am just selfish or what it is, but I find a complete relief of stress being single. I like that I do not have to take another person's feelings into consideration, and making decisions on my own without having to confer with someone else and hear their point of view.
    So, I have been single ever since, and I am not looking.
    I moved to a new town and started over with my teenagers, but unfortunately when I got to the point where they were pretty much able to care for themselves and I took a job outside of the house, I was diagnosed with stage IV breast cancer that had spread to my liver, and eventually spread to my brain twice. So, all those plans for what I would do when my kids were grown up and I finally had time for myself kind of disappeared, as this is a terminal diagnosis. Booooo!
    Now, I have moved yet again to be closer to my parents and the rest of my small family. My youngest son is 20, and still lives with me. He helps me with the things I have trouble doing. I'm on full disability, but I couldn't handle just sitting around all day every day so I am taking college classes in a new field. I take online classes as I am not quite good enough to attend on campus, and that works well for me.
    Other than that, I am not sure what to say. My life is pretty boring, lol!
    I do want to say, though, that after getting this diagnosis, I am even more sure that age doesn't matter in a relationship. Well, let me take that back, it does to some degree because you will be facing issues that are different from same age couples. However, every couple has issues to deal with. You find love where you find it, and you fight for it when you need to. Every relationship has ups and downs. I have always said that some people go a lifetime without finding true love, and if you do find it you better work hard for it. It isn't easy, but nothing worthwhile ever is.
    Much love to all of you!
    What lies behind us, and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us.
    ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson ~

  7. #7
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    I'm a relative newcomer to Ageless compared to these ladies, joining in January 2010 shortly after becoming involved in a LDR with a much younger man in Great Britain (I live on the West Coast of Canada.

    I was still with my husband at the time but things had been going downhill steadily for several years, but in such a gradual way as to be almost unnoticeable.. he had no passion left for me, ignored my attempts to reconnect in that way, always saying he was stressed over work or afraid he'd hurt his back, etc etc. I had decided I could not go on that way for another 40 plus years, and he had actually told me that if I could find the passion with someone else, to go for it. He meant I should have a fling.

    I met Chris on Vampire Freaks, a sort of My Space for alternative types.. goth and metal, mainly. We became friends.

    This is the first time I have actually put this part of the situation out here, I had been keeping it to myself out of some odd obligation to my family, but it no longer matters. Our children are grown, my younger son lives with his father, my older son has finished technical school, started on his career, and moved out to cut his commute by more than an hour each way and be closer to his girlfriend.

    In Chris I found what I had been missing. Emotional support, passion, just being there. That he could do this from 8 time zones away and my husband could not when he was in the same room spoke volumes. After I met Chris face to face and spent some time with him, my ex and I separated, and I moved into the basement suite of our family home. I now own that home outright, after buying him out with Chris's help. Chris and I married in late 2010, and his immigration was approved and he moved here permanently a year later. My ex had an excellent job opportunity in his hometown, and moved there with my younger son two years ago.

    It is still a rough ride, in that the job opportunities are very limited in Chris's field (he was a civil servant for 7 years) and the only job he's been able to land is in fast food, where there is a lot of underhanded activity regarding temporary foreign workers getting the best shifts and landed immigrants and citizens getting the dregs left over. Our Immigration department is finally looking into changing things but how long that will take to actually trickle down and make an improvement, if any, is anyone's guess. In the mean time we hope the job market will improve and keep trying for something better.

    I still credit some ladies here with making this all possible, in particular Bella, grumpysgirl (who appears to have left, but is still on my friends list on Facebook), and kittylane. Without them, I do not know if I would have taken the leap of faith required to become serious with a much younger man.

    These days find the two of us heavily involved in The BC Reptile Club, he as vice president (and official mascot LOL!) and me as Secretary Treasurer. Look us up on Facebook or on the web if you're curious Our reptile family at home has grown to 16 snakes of various species and 4 geckos, also of various species.
    Daisypath Anniversary tickers
    Age gap: 22 years, 6 days.

  8. #8
    whiterose's Avatar
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    Loving these updates. This is a great idea. For those of you who are still with your ym, you're great examples to others that age has nothing to do with it.

    For those of us who had failed ym relationships, we apparently all picked ********.

    My update for those who don't know, Remi and I broke up about 4-5 years ago. I truly cannot remember when. Since then, I haven't dated anyone else and to be honest, it isn't a big deal to me. If I do meet someone, great, but I am not actively looking.

    I am focused on my life with my children and grandchildren. My son is 30 now, married and a software developer. He and his wife have two girls. Natalie turns 8 in August. And Emme, pronounced like Emmy, is 16 months old and a complete firecracker. Both girls are staying with me later this month while mommy and daddy go to the Electric Forest Festival in Michigan.

    My daughter turns 21 in August and will start her 3rd year of college this fall. She is engaged to a young man from South Africa who is working on a pro tennis career. He came to her university on a tennis scholarship.

    So glad to hear the updates, even though most of you, so far, are on my Facebook friends list. We just don't seem to get detailed updates there.

  9. #9
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    etc..

    Wanted to add this... ((((Jody)))). Saying prayers <3
    To Bella, TY for starting this thread and reaching out to all of us. <3
    Some of us may have fought at times, especially with the moderators, and in "politically speaking"..oh, sorry, that was just me BUT, what we went through, shared, happy or sad, has forever bonded us.
    With Love,
    TD

  10. #10
    whiterose's Avatar
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    Yes, definitely prayers for Jody. She is at the top of my prayer list. <3

  11. #11
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    Wow Rose!
    I remember when you were awaiting your first granddaughter!
    And yes, A$$h**** come in all ages.
    From reading these updates, I'd say, statistically speaking, AG relationships are no different than any other couples out there. How cool is it that we are a part of that history in helping bring it into the mainstream!
    Then there are some of us who do enjoy the freedom to come and go as we please. Isn't great to have learned that about ourselves?
    <3

  12. #12
    Bella's Avatar
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    You're right, A$$hats do come in all ages. Guess what? Thanks to not being with one of those, I still have the freedom to come and go as I please. Love you ladies, I hope more come on in.

  13. #13
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    ...

    I bet you do Bella..I wouldn't mess with ya
    When I say "come and go"..I mean..I am going to India, or where ever, and I don't know when I am coming back lol!
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  14. #14
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    Hi!

    I'm not really active here anymore, but I have dropped by a couple of times to give some updates

    For those who don't know me, I'm from Norway and I came here to AL in 2004. Same story as most. I had fallen in love with a guy much younger than me (he was 19 and I was 32) and was searching the internet for something about OW/YM relationships.
    Joel not only was 13 years younger than me, but he lived in WA... and I in Norway.
    Joel and I met through a forum called Metalforums and it all started with Joel "following" me every time I posted something and giving me compliments. At first I thought it was just fun and did not take it very serious, but It was fun chatting with him and joking around on the forum. The forum's admin soon got tired of us, and told us to take it to the PM's
    And so we did!
    After a while our tone became more serious and we both understood that this was more than just for fun.
    And after talking for maybe 6 months online we decided that we had to meet IRL.
    Joel and I met for the first time when he came over in Easter 2005... and we just clicked.
    After spending a short week together, Joel had to go back to WA, but not long after we decided that we had to give this a real chance and in order to make that happen we had to get married... and so we did. I traveled to the US and we got married Juli 22nd 2005.
    Since then we have had our ups and downs. I have 2 kids(girls) from before (then 10 and 15) and to the older one this marriage was not easy. My daughter and I were already having trouble and me getting married to Joel ignited things between me and my daughter.
    Joel been so young and me getting so exhausted by the whole situation almost ended our marriage at one time. We had a huge fight and both of us told the other to go somewhere not so pleasant... But I guess deep inside none of us were ready to let go...

    Things hasn't been smooth sailing after that either... but I think that we both know that it is safe to get angry, have a fight, clear some air and know that tomorrow is a another day that we will spend together as a married couple.

    December 30th we had a baby girl that we named Maria Lynn and 18 months later on Joel's 26th birthday we had a little boy (little as in 11+lbs). His Name is Liam Alexander.
    Maria is now 4 and a half and Liam is 3 next month.
    Karima the oldest daughter moved out and then in and has now moved for real I think She just turnes 24 and she work in a daycare. Nadia is 19 and still living at home. She has a boyfriend that she had been with for 2,5 year now and I hope they will stay together. He is a really nice guy ♥

    Joel is working in DHL loading and unloading trucks, I'm working in a activity center for people with various disabilities (mainly mental disabilities) I became a LPN 5 or 6 years ago and if I get in, I will start on a bachelor degree equivalent to a nursing degree only with specialization in behavior and organizing so that people with extra challenges can live meaningful lives.

    Love, Aina!
    eponavet, whiterose, 1love and 7 others like this.

  15. #15
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    6,281
    I loved reading and revisiting everyone's story and updates. <3

    Like many others, I met my guy in an online game (Everyquest) in 2005. We ended up in a random group together and became instant friends. I had been online in chat forums and gaming since the mid to late 90's and had never been attracted or involved with anyone so it never occurred to me that he (18) and I (32) would ever be anything other than casual friends so I never put my guard up.

    One day he said to me that he found himself thinking about me and that he thought he may be attracted to me. I immediately dismissed him as we had never talked outside of the game or even exchanged pictures, but he was persistent. I agreed to exchange pictures thinking that once he saw me he would quickly lose interest, but to my surprise it fueled him on. I kept sending him pictures of me without make-up, having just woke up, anything that would say, "No, see. I'm really ugly.", but he only kept pursuing me.

    Like others have said we spent a lot of time talking. When we met in real life for the first time, I felt so much chemistry that I didn't know how I would ever say goodbye to him, even temporarily. We agreed he'd only stay until we started to wear on each other's nerves and then we'd begin a LDR, but I think we both knew that our first day together was going to be permanent. We began living together that day, though it wasn't planned and it took a cross country road trip and a few packages by mail to get all his stuff.

    What brought me to Ageless in 2006 was an unexpected pregnancy shortly after our physical relationship began. I was going to end the relationship sure I was ruining his life and that I was just behaving like a lovesick dolt. He begged me to seek an outside perspective so I searched online for older women younger men and found Ageless. I posted, sure that membership would respond confirming my worst fears, but, instead, they all supported my VYM and pointed out how poorly I was behaving.

    We had our daughter when he was 19 & I was 33 and it took me a LONG time to work through my fears and sense of total responsibility. It didn't matter that from day one he was thrilled to be with me or that the day he became a father he cried or that he proposed and begged me to set a wedding date (of which I cancelled 3 times on him). All that mattered was I was older and knew better than him. Several members helped me re-frame my perspective but time really was the biggest help.

    I stuck around once I no longer needed support, modding for a period of time as a thank you, so that if another woman found herself in a similar situation with a VYM, she would see someone counter balancing the overwhelming odds that it was "guaranteed" to fall apart.

    We are now 27 & 41 and still very much in love. No, it's not perfect, but it's far more fulfilling than I ever thought it would be. Yes we have problems and there are times I'd like to poke his eyes out (and I'm sure he'd say the same), but there are far more moments where I am downright giddy to be with him. There are nights where he'll be holding me in his sleep and a tear will escape my eye because I am so very grateful for whatever force brought us together. We have both changed and challenged each other over the years (9), but we have consistently sought each other's arms when our cards are down. Though I never believed that it was possible, he is the great love of my life and wherever he is, I am home.
    there before the threshold, I saw a brighter world beyond myself

    Daisypath Anniversary tickers Daisypath Anniversary tickers

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