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Thread: Easy way to find out if that younger guy likes you

  1. #1
    kuurt is offline Neophyte
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    Easy way to find out if that younger guy likes you

    I was reading another post on here titled "How did you let him know", where Mark505 was asking the older women how they first let their younger guy know they were interested in him. And I'm not surprised by their answers:

    "The first younger man I was involved with had made it quite clear that he liked me"

    "I do not think I have ever expressed interest in a man in real life, I let them take the initiative. I think that in the case of a younger man, I would take the initiative even less."

    "I didn't exactly 'let him know'."

    I'm not surprised by their answers because women are generally more passive. If they see a guy they like, a lot of them will not take action with their words. They will just wait and see if he's going to make a move - hoping that he does. It's kind of the guys job to make the move, I get that, but, it can be difficult for us guys to make a move on a lovely mature women due to the gap in our ages. We have these fears that it's probably going to go badly due the uncommon nature of age gap relationships/connections.

    So if you ladies ever find yourselves wondering if he likes you and wishing that he'd make a move, why not help him out a little bit? Try this when you see him. Make sure you're alone with him first because if there are other people present he might not feel as comfortable speaking his mind. Tell him you're in a good mood because some guy gave you a compliment - told you that you were pretty or whatever a few minutes ago or earlier today. If he really is attracted to you and interested he will probably jump on the opportunity to agree with the guys assessment of you and compliment you as well, maybe even add to the compliment. "He's right, you are pretty". Or "I agree, you really are quite lovely, especially when you wear your hair up like that".

    He may even take it farther by saying something like, "Well, if doesn't work out with you and that other guy, you give me a call."

    And if he doesn't respond to that first comment, follow up by saying that you don't get very many compliments at your age. With that comment you're just giving him another chance to show some interest in you. He'll surely say something at that point if he's really into you.

    When I originally thought of this idea, due to a situation in my own life recently, I was thinking about it in this context of an older woman using it on a younger man, but really I think we could all use this on anybody we're interested in regardless of their age. I suppose us younger guys could even use it on older women as well to get things rolling.

    I wonder what other things like this you could say to someone to find out if they're interested or to get them to take some action. Share if you can think of anything.
    melodioussoul and LunaLove like this.

  2. #2
    Charisme's Avatar
    Charisme is offline Senior Member
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    **And if he doesn't respond to that first comment, follow up by saying that you don't get very many compliments at your age. With that comment you're just giving him another chance to show some interest in you. He'll surely say something at that point if he's really into you.**

    And at what age do we stop getting compliments? And what kind of compliment would that be ?

    Most of the ladies on this site have good self-esteem and confidence so they would not lowered themselves like that.

    For the ladies who are working on their self-esteem and confidence this is terrible to introduce yourself that way
    degausser and theREALTrish like this.
    "Your greatest gift to give is your own happiness."

  3. #3
    truckman Guest
    I've always found "Hey, I'm getting coffee. Would you like to join me?" a great way to drop the hint that you like someone.

    If they respond enthusiastically, they just might like you too.
    If they tell you they'd rather take a bath with rabid porcupines, probably not.
    fiorinda, Lotus, degausser and 4 others like this.

  4. #4
    Slow Worm's Avatar
    Slow Worm is offline Senior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by Charisme View Post
    **And if he doesn't respond to that first comment, follow up by saying that you don't get very many compliments at your age. With that comment you're just giving him another chance to show some interest in you. He'll surely say something at that point if he's really into you.**

    And at what age do we stop getting compliments? And what kind of compliment would that be ?

    Most of the ladies on this site have good self-esteem and confidence so they would not lowered themselves like that.

    For the ladies who are working on their self-esteem and confidence this is terrible to introduce yourself that way
    Welcome back, Charisme - seven years since your last post!


    SW
    Charisme likes this.

  5. #5
    kuurt is offline Neophyte
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    Most of the ladies on this site have good self-esteem and confidence so they would not lowered themselves like that.
    I'm sure it's probably normal though to not get hit on as much as you get older. People probably assume you're married for one. And I don't think you have to have low self-esteem or lower yourself to say something like that. Although I see your point, it might not be the best thing to say because it could be taken that way. It's probably all in how you say it. I wasn't even thinking about it that way when I wrote this.

    What made me thinking about this in the first place was that I took my grandpa to the doctor one day and the nurse practitioner was a mature older lady. To me that is, not to him. He told her how lovely she was and she thanked him for the compliment and said she doesn't get many compliments at her age. I don't thank she had low self-esteem and I would have to agree with my grandpa that she was lovely, even to me. So that's where this whole line of conversation came from. It was inspired from that event. When she said she didn't get many compliments at her age she didn't say it in a low self esteem kind of way.

  6. #6
    fiorinda's Avatar
    fiorinda is offline Senior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by kuurt View Post
    I'm sure it's probably normal though to not get hit on as much as you get older. People probably assume you're married for one.
    Bwahahahahahahahaha!!! What absolute tosh!

    And head games?! Don't play head games people!!! Just be honest. For goodness sake, head games are for teenagers! If you like someone, tell them you like them. Don't sit around waiting for them to tell you. If they don't reciprocate, so what? Move on and be thankful you've not wasted a load of time wondering.
    degausser, Lotus and LunaLove like this.
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  7. #7
    SheLikesKitties's Avatar
    SheLikesKitties is offline OW/YM 21YR GAP
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    To me one of the #1 traits that makes a man attractive to me, is to feel that I am attractive to him. Otherwise, he could be Antonio Banderas, and he will be, to me, practically genderless. I am not attracted to men that are not attracted to me, and that has made my life quite easy and pleasant. And at present, I am not attracted to men other than my husband. I may find a man (like Antonio Banderas o Denzel Washington) handsome, as I can find a woman pretty, or a painting beautiful, but no sexual attraction.

    So I really would not implement any strategy to find out if a man of any age likes me.

    At present I implement strategies to make sure people know I am not available.
    You know it's love when the pain of being apart is greater than the pain of being together.

  8. #8
    melodioussoul is offline Neophyte
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    Quote Originally Posted by kuurt View Post
    I was reading another post on here titled "How did you let him know", where Mark505 was asking the older women how they first let their younger guy know they were interested in him. And I'm not surprised by their answers:

    "The first younger man I was involved with had made it quite clear that he liked me"

    "I do not think I have ever expressed interest in a man in real life, I let them take the initiative. I think that in the case of a younger man, I would take the initiative even less."

    "I didn't exactly 'let him know'."

    I'm not surprised by their answers because women are generally more passive. If they see a guy they like, a lot of them will not take action with their words. They will just wait and see if he's going to make a move - hoping that he does. It's kind of the guys job to make the move, I get that, but, it can be difficult for us guys to make a move on a lovely mature women due to the gap in our ages. We have these fears that it's probably going to go badly due the uncommon nature of age gap relationships/connections.

    So if you ladies ever find yourselves wondering if he likes you and wishing that he'd make a move, why not help him out a little bit? Try this when you see him. Make sure you're alone with him first because if there are other people present he might not feel as comfortable speaking his mind. Tell him you're in a good mood because some guy gave you a compliment - told you that you were pretty or whatever a few minutes ago or earlier today. If he really is attracted to you and interested he will probably jump on the opportunity to agree with the guys assessment of you and compliment you as well, maybe even add to the compliment. "He's right, you are pretty". Or "I agree, you really are quite lovely, especially when you wear your hair up like that".

    He may even take it farther by saying something like, "Well, if doesn't work out with you and that other guy, you give me a call."

    And if he doesn't respond to that first comment, follow up by saying that you don't get very many compliments at your age. With that comment you're just giving him another chance to show some interest in you. He'll surely say something at that point if he's really into you.

    When I originally thought of this idea, due to a situation in my own life recently, I was thinking about it in this context of an older woman using it on a younger man, but really I think we could all use this on anybody we're interested in regardless of their age. I suppose us younger guys could even use it on older women as well to get things rolling.

    I wonder what other things like this you could say to someone to find out if they're interested or to get them to take some action. Share if you can think of anything.
    YES. I don't mind making the first move, but at least give me something to work with. I'm a guy who's generally and genuinely interested in older women. It would be nice to know I'm not wasting my time, especially since it seems like the majority of older women, for whatever reasons, are not interested in younger guys.

  9. #9
    Lotus is offline Neophyte
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    With a shy guy.... help him along.

    I have always been attracted to shy guys... it takes a long time for them to finally muster up the courage to ask you to go out with them so you might overlook them all together. I know I did that many times and found out that I was pleasantly surprised that the guy likes me.

    I haven't got much experience with shy younger men but I must say... when my ex told me about his long standing infatuation with me I was so surprised. I was the all powerful self confident, intelligent, charming woman to who was larger than life to him; he never thought he had any chance so he didn't bother until I noticed him (this is after 5 years of close friendship and leaving him in the friend zone).

    Sorry, but with a shy man you probably need to muster up the courage and make the first move.... help him along as a friend, create more chances to spend time together with him as friends, coax him out and let him do the rest. You'll be surprised what you'll find!

  10. #10
    Lotus is offline Neophyte
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    Quote Originally Posted by kuurt View Post
    I'm sure it's probably normal though to not get hit on as much as you get older. People probably assume you're married for one.
    I find that is not true at all! If you just let others know in passing that you're single.... you'll be surprised how many hits you get from younger men. It's not how old you are but how you carry yourself! I know I carry myself much better now than I did in my twenties.
    Last edited by Lotus; 12-17-2016 at 09:02 AM.
    Magnolia likes this.

  11. #11
    Corsair is offline Member
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    Most men will be pretty direct in telling the woman he likes her. It tends to be women who can be so subtle that their interest goes unnoticed!

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