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Thread: Tell us about your age gap

  1. #16
    Lwilliams Guest
    I registered quite some time ago, however this is my first post.
    I've been in a committed AGR for 5 years now and it has been wonderful.
    I had a couple real dose bad relationships prior to this, all with AGR (seems older men have the key to my heart).
    All the best to my fellow OM lovers out there.
    Cheers ... Linda

  2. #17
    imjumpy's Avatar
    imjumpy is offline Member
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    South of Denver
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    I just recently started posting here myself, though I registered back in January. My boyfriend is 15 years younger than me. (He's 35, I'm 50) The one thing I notice, over and over, is how much we older women fret and fuss over the age gap, and the guys hardly ever seem to.

    It has been the hardest thing for me to do, to just relax and let it be. To be "in the now" is a lesson I have to learn, seems like every day, anew. But I wouldn't change a thing. My young guy has me doing things I've never done before, pushing my personal envelope. Rock climbing, buying organic food, getting rid of cable TV and only watching videos checked out from the library, learning to play Mahjong......all these are things I've never done before!

    We work together, and knew each other for over a year before we started going out together. New territory for both of us - neither one was looking for someone so far away from our own age. But, it's working so far, and in fact, it keeps getting better and better. So I won't argue with the Fates!
    Jumpy
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  3. #18
    vany83 Guest
    hi there!

    I'm a newbie here.. So my name is vany, i'm 26 years old and the love of my life is 55! He and I have never felt so much in love before, for anyone....its a wonderful feeling. I wish all the same one

    Happy new year to all of you !

  4. #19
    david76011 Guest

    18YW 47OM we met and love each other 29 year gap

    We met on line Christina is 18 and I am 47.
    We stated looking for a fling and NOW we are in love. We will meet each other soon [ Jan 5th 2009 ] She and I are excited.

    We talk about all sorts of things, we just can't put the phone down at night, we test on the phone most of the day.

    We hope to find support here for us and be supportive to others here!

  5. #20
    Jack Dawson Guest
    What an awesome and inspiring story, Belle! Congrats!

    Quote Originally Posted by belle1025 View Post
    Wow, I remember back when you use to post about your relationship with R.

    I originally came here looking for support some years back (my username was bella belle)as I was involved in a LDR with a man 18 years older than me. Our relationship lasted over 2 years and then we broke up due to the distance that seperated us oddly enough after ending the distance in our relationship... we were found back in a LDR.

    Post break-up with him, I wasn't even looking for a relationship when I met my now husband who is 15 years older than me. We met on a rooftop on July 4th and slowly realized we had feelings for one another. Once our friendship turned to more we dated seriously for 6 months. At one point he decided I was going to break his heart one day so he wanted to end things before that ever could happen. Although he would often say. "If you were older I'd marry you!". He broke up with me. I was a mess!

    Ironically, he would call me every once in a while. About 1 month after breaking up, a few days before Thanksgiving, he called to see what plans I had. I was staying home all alone not even celebrating T Day. So he invited me over to his place for Thanksgiving although I'd be doing the cooking. Somehow, along the way, his family ended up coming over to celebrate the day with us. I worried about everything! I thought his family would think I was too young, his mom would hate me, the food would not be tasty enough, etc... I ended up burning my hand severely in all the stress.

    Turned out everyone LOVED the food I prepared. His mom loved me immediately and so did the rest of his family! I ended up staying the night, the following day, two of his newphews, whom I met on T Day; where in a fatal accident. I ended up staying a few weeks to help him cope and to be with him and his family as they mourned. A few weeks before Christmas he asked me if I wanted to go to Vegas for NYE. I was reluctant as we had just broken up a few months before and I didnt want to attach myself emotionally if we were to remain friends. It was now Christmas and Im still staying over nightly!

    We were celebrating Christmas together when he asked me to marry him. I was literally LOL as, again, we were not together anymore. Before I even answered his question I told him he needed time to think about us because if he had any doubts or questioned that I would one day leave him we should not spend any time together let alone get married.

    We went to Vegas and after we returned, he asked me if I was ever going to answer his proposal. It took me from December 25, 2007 to December 27, 2008 to finally answer his proposal with a yes. I wanted more than anything, for him to be sure in his heart that I loved him and it wasnt just a phase that I was involved with him- 15 yrs older than me.

    We grew a lot together during that year. He learned a lot about age less love. I later learned his parents were 26 years apart. His mom younger than his dad. To him it was hard, as he saw his dad going through a "phase" in his relationship with his mom. She was actually his mistress.

    I couldnt be happier! We are newlyweds and 15 years apart!

  6. #21
    slow_release Guest
    I have been dating my 46 OM for nearly two years now (I will be 24 in Feb). There is a 23 year gap.

    We met playing cards at a local bar and have been seeing each other ever since. I will admit in the beginning it was kind of a fantasy for me to be with an older man. But for a while now, it hasn't been like that. I look at him as my friend/boyfriend/lover, not as the older fantasy man. We became best friends and have clearly fallen for each other as well in the process.

    The past year we have grown to enjoy each other so much and learned what we want from this relationship/life/each other. I'm very excited to see how the next year will turn out.

  7. #22
    sillyfool Guest

    Unhappy

    We were 9 yrs old apart. I was 29 when I know him and he is 20, an intern from my company.

    Just broke off last mid december, after 1yr 4 mths and he is now happily with his new girlfriend who is same age as him.

    Somehow I was very very disappointed, I read from another forum that guys who go after older woman usually go for sex, somehow it's true that he always want me to oral with him and till now, he still refuse to pay me back the money I loan him, claiming he have no money. I saw his bank account figure before and it is almost 10x of how I loan him, so I can only conclude he is lying to me all along.

    I wish better luck to others who are with younger man, I won't denial I know some such relationship with good ending, but just a word of cautious to all. =D

  8. #23
    shylakirby's Avatar
    shylakirby is offline I love my husband
    Join Date
    Dec 2004
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    40
    I'm 27 and my OM is 48. We have been together since November 2006 and are discussing marriage.


    Married my prince charming December 6th, 2009

  9. #24
    dootch is offline Neophyte
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    There is a 13 year age difference between me and my girlfriend. She is 13 years older than me. I am 44 and she is 57 and I have found my near perfect woman. We have the same likes and dislikes and people say that we even look alike. We are a couple and I have lost count of the number of times people have referred to her as my wife. I love her for who and what she is and the age is incidental to our relationship - not the reason we are together. We started out as just good friends and made the crossover one day as we were spending so much time in each others company. It was a natural occurence and we barely noticed the change when it came.

  10. #25
    MariaElena's Avatar
    MariaElena is offline Irreverent User
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    Northwest Territory
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    I am new here and I just posted an introductory thread in the OM/YW Relationship Support forum because that is where I have been doing the most reading. This thread seems like a nice way to introduce myself to everyone else.

    I am a 35yo YW in a 19yr AGR. We have been together for 6 years. We met at a work related function. We noticed each other right away but we had a nice long 5 year courtship before getting married 1 year ago. We have had very little angst over the age difference between ourselves and hardly ever discuss it except in the context of the negative remarks and glances we receive from others. In my mind's eye I see us breezing down the street hand-in-hand happy as a summer's eve. It is completely natural to me.

    Congratulations to the loving couples on this forum and best wishes to all!

    M.E.
    Seb Tombs likes this.

  11. #26
    HappyBunny Guest

    My Age Gap

    I'm 20. He's 47...who acts like a 28 year old. He is mature in all the right areas and immature that makes life spontaneous and unpredictable. You can almost NEVER take him seriously, except when I ask him to raise his hand to see if he is being honest or not. He has me rolling on the floor laughing with all the stories and experiences he has. I learned a lot from him...he taught me how to be calmer and not as anxious about things. I help him to 'leave yesterday behind.' He is pretty bitter about his life...he has never been married and doesn't have kids. He is the youngest of 16 siblings...yes, 16. His family is horrible so he is bitter about them too. AND if I mention something else he's never done, you all would think he's a weirdo just like that movie. (that movie hint was a big clue). But my family is supportive and so far the ones that eventually figured out that we were dating weren't disgusted at all. He's in pretty good health. He doesn't take any pills or medication for anything. Just vitamins.

    He makes me smile with all the corny jokes he tells...knowing they are lame. He says them when I'm nervous or mad at him or anxious about something so that I laugh. He's a kid at heart, which is why I was attracted to him in the first place. He's my landlord...and next door neighbor. He's been a bachelor for 30 years but has ALWAYS wanted someone to love and he never compromised. Maybe he should've but then he never would've found me. He wants to marry me tomorrow but we decided to wait till after I turned 21 (september). I've been dating him for almost 3 months but he were friends for 2 years prior. I had a childish crush on him but he just thought of me as a kid. I was and still am. But I finally wore him down (that's not completely true).

    He dyed his hair for me (he went premature gray when he was 25!) so that people wouldn't think I am dating my grandfather. Now he looks like there's a 17 year age gap instead of 27. YAY!! It does help.

    It's wonderful sometimes cuz when we are staring at eachother, he starts to tear (cry) because he says, "I'm just so happy. If I knew there was someone like you in the world, I wouldn't have been so bitter thinking that I'd never be happy with anyone." I wipe his tears away (or tell him to stop crying.) But he doesn't cry about much. He is sensible, wise, funny, active, a handyman (built part of his house all by himself), super intelligent (puts people on jeopardy to shame), financially secure (for now anyway) and cares for me so much. He tries to surprise me but I always end up finding out the surprise. He HATES that but says he enjoys the challenge. I hate surprises but let him do it cuz it makes him happy.

    People say I'm missing out on life if I 'settle' for an old guy that i'll have to take care of eventually. I say- I'm with my best friend who is just jumping at the idea of doing hiking, traveling, scuba diving, canoing, and snuggling with me (I just want to do the snuggling). I couldn't care less about the other stuff. He's enhancing my experiences, not limiting them. He hasn't done all of those things so we will both be enhancing our experiences.

    He's the a great match for me and I hope we get married next year.
    Seb Tombs likes this.

  12. #27
    Lorenzo Guest

    Smile First time out here

    I'm not sure if I'm doing this right...I'm not that great at all the computer terminology (threads, posts and all that garboldeegook). I'm not currently in a relationship, but find myself presently mostly attracted to much younger ladies (I'm almost 50 and find the 30-35 y/olds most appealing to me. A short while back, I was dating a lady of only 24...she has always dated older men. And, although the age gap was a bit too much for her (too close to her Dad's age) we still remain good friends...and I'm even friends with her family including her dad!

    Many of my work associates (mostly the females) try to lay a guilt trip on me for being interested in younger ladies. But when one of the older ladies is dating a much younger guy, they argue that "that's ok"....no sense trying to point out the double-standard to them, they just get more argumentative.

    Frankly, I don't see the "age thing" as being any sort of indication as to whether one should find another attractive. How would that work? I mean really....would you go up to the one you're attracted to and say "Excuse me, I need to know how old are you 'cause I need to know if it's okay to be attracted to you?" How silly would that be, right? But most of those around me seem to respond that way.

    Age boundaries totally make no sense to me; although I have seen some extremes on TV (Maury Povich) that startled me - he was 62 and she was 12! I believe a relationship essentially depends on how two people feel about each other, and have they passed the "test of time" to ensure it's not just a lust thing.

    Quite a while back, I started chumming around with an older lady that I worked with. We had so much fun together. We could totally confide in each other, and spent many hours just talkiing about anything and every thiing. We spent a lot of time traveling around California where I'd been posted with my work. Eventually things just evolved and we became intimate until I was forced to relocate with my job. She was 46 and I was 29. And when I was 31, I dated a lady of 19. We simply loved each others' company and had an honest fondness for each other. Mostly I've found that the two individuals involved in the intimacy don't have a problem with age differences....it's the friends and family that struggle with it.

    So why am I on this site? I hope to find support for my beliefs. And, also it would be great to meet some new friends in my area to spend time with who believe as I do.

    All the best to every one!

    Lorenzo

  13. #28
    myoulove Guest
    Quote Originally Posted by ade164 View Post

    People say I'm missing out on life if I 'settle' for an old guy that i'll have to take care of eventually. I say- I'm with my best friend who is just jumping at the idea of doing hiking, traveling, scuba diving, canoing, and snuggling with me (I just want to do the snuggling). I couldn't care less about the other stuff. He's enhancing my experiences, not limiting them. He hasn't done all of those things so we will both be enhancing our experiences.
    I've heard the same thing from others when talking about my 'situation'. I'm 19 and my SO is 36. But no one can tell you your missing out if you feel what you say you do. It's opening up a new world of experiences, the complete opposite of 'tying you down'. As long as he doesn't prevent you from doing what you need or very much want to do, you should feel UN tied and as if you didn't have to go through a million people to find the one you want. I say people will call it 'settle' because they're jealous. I mean, yes, a good amount of people do settle early, but it doesn't apply to everyone. And as far as you taking care of him? Well... if you want QUANTITY over QUALITY... I mean, PLEASE! I short life lived to the fullest or long years of life in death... Of course it's a concern to worry about their health, but I think love conquers that feeling. If in years to come, his health is an issue... I mean, I know at least in my position, if my SO's cancer ever came back I'd be at his side every moment I had to spend. So health is a thought, but I personally don't think it should be a decisive one.

    Sorry for rambling.
    Hope that was a decent comment to read...


  14. #29
    HappyBunny Guest
    Quote Originally Posted by myoulove View Post

    Sorry for rambling.
    Hope that was a decent comment to read...

    NO!!! You weren't rambling. I think you are very correct in what you say. and it WAS a great comment to read. It brightened up my day. I wish I could give you a hug!!!

    Thanks for the support. I love it here. *sigh*

  15. #30
    myoulove Guest
    Quote Originally Posted by ade164 View Post
    NO!!! You weren't rambling. I think you are very correct in what you say. and it WAS a great comment to read. It brightened up my day. I wish I could give you a hug!!!

    Thanks for the support. I love it here. *sigh*
    I'm so glad I brightened your day! That makes mine better.
    And I'll give you a mental hug, because we can all use one now and then!

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