AgeMatch.com - the best dating site for inter-generational lovers!  

Page 2 of 2 FirstFirst 12
Results 16 to 29 of 29
Like Tree39Likes

Thread: Am I a bad girl?

  1. #16
    gorillagirl Guest
    i want to highly recommend you go to www dot urbandictionary dot com to look for definitions of (for example) girlfriend, boyfriend, partner, booty call, hook up, fk buddy, wifey, boytoy, lover, etc.

    i am 51 years old. i am married but separated and have not lived with my husband for 3 years. we are friends and still married because of medical insurance and home co-ownership. i have had a few boy toys, booty calls, hook ups. age has no bearing on the nature of relationships. i had a very serious boyfriend/partner for 5 years when i was 14 and i've had a booty call dude for 2 years now (with a few breaks...not "break ups" because we're not "together"). it's all about the 2 people at the time. generalizations don't work, esp. with women in their 50s (such as myself) who have been around the block and are open minded about non-traditional type relationships (for example: i don't want the hassle of a live-in lover but i want the sex a boy toy will give me...and then GO HOME).

    in your case, you have no boyfriend, partner, lover. you're a free agent. you're not obligated to any man for any reason.
    Last edited by gorillagirl; 12-17-2013 at 02:15 PM.

  2. #17
    Faith's Avatar
    Faith is offline Some assembly required
    Join Date
    May 2007
    Location
    Left coast
    Posts
    2,419
    At 32, you are not a "girl." You are a middle-aged woman.

    You have frequently mentioned your church.
    If you think you are "bad," go see your priest or pastor or whoever your church leader is, and talk to him or her.
    That is, if you are serious.

    But I have my doubts.
    "Leave the gun...take the cannoli."

  3. #18
    YoungOldSol is offline Member
    Join Date
    Dec 2013
    Posts
    45
    No I don't feel I am bad but I often feel guilty.

    I appreciate the feedback and answers. I am not a religious person but I always try to do the right thing.

  4. #19
    gorillagirl Guest
    if you're not religious, why are you referring to church?
    RadoG60 likes this.

  5. #20
    fiorinda's Avatar
    fiorinda is offline Senior Member
    Join Date
    Nov 2013
    Location
    Yorkshire UK
    Posts
    481
    Just wondering, YOS, many churches and ministers offer couples counselling/marriage preparation courses, maybe yours does, and if so, maybe whoever does these courses would be a good person to talk to to ask some of the questions you have regarding relationships. Usually when people talk about being in a relationship, they are referring to a 'romantic relationship' (regardless of whether that includes sex, which most do but obviously, for some religious people, they don't). I'm also curious to know, if you aren't a religious person, why you go to church?

    I echo what the others have said, the seriousness of any relationship is not related to age. I know people who are still, in their 40s and 50s, married to their first ever boyfriend or girlfriend from school. I know people in their 40s and 50s who have never really settled down with anyone. And all the shades inbetween. I've had a lot of relationships through my life, but I only consider 4 of them to be properly serious (although others have been long, and exclusive etc). I lived with 3 of those 4 partners. The first began when I was 18 years old.

    Do you watch TV, YOS, and movies? You must have seen depictions of all kinds of relationships in these. We don't usually mean friendships when we refer to someone's relationship. For that we would say 'friendship' and for family we would say 'family' or 'family relationship'. Some people use the term 'girlfriend' to refer to their female friends, but it's not usual to refer to one's male friends as boyfriends (no idea why this is the case!). Personally I just say friend to refer to friends of either sex.

    I'd say, quite categorically, that you are not in a relationship with G (and I for one doubt you ever will be, to be honest), so therefore you are perfectly at liberty to see whoever else you please - and even if you were in a relationship with him, you would still be perfectly within your rights to spend time with whoever you please as a friend anyway! Go meet with the guy from your church, he sounds like a much better bet!!!
    theREALTrish likes this.

  6. #21
    Faith's Avatar
    Faith is offline Some assembly required
    Join Date
    May 2007
    Location
    Left coast
    Posts
    2,419
    Quote Originally Posted by YoungOldSol View Post
    I am not a religious person but I always try to do the right thing.
    In that case, the right thing to do, right away, is to inform the guy who invited you to 12th Night at your church that you are NOT religious. Otherwise, you are misleading the poor guy, and that would indeed make you Bad.
    "Leave the gun...take the cannoli."

  7. #22
    gorillagirl Guest
    brilliant.
    mskitty likes this.

  8. #23
    gorillagirl Guest
    YOS- whoever/whatever you are...people on this site are not stupid. There is no possible way you could be this naive/innocent unless you live under a rock on an Amish (or Mennonite, whatever) farm...and in that case, you'd be religious. Truly. What's your real story? People here get fed up really quickly with posts that sound untrue...like yours. So, if you're looking for online friends/attention/advice here, show us what you DO know cuz you sound like a 12 year old girl and as Faith so brilliantly pointed out, you're a middle aged woman. Adults only here so come clean.
    theREALTrish and mskitty like this.

  9. #24
    Faith's Avatar
    Faith is offline Some assembly required
    Join Date
    May 2007
    Location
    Left coast
    Posts
    2,419
    Ah gee whiz, GG. Don't kill this thread. It was just beginning to get interesting.
    "Leave the gun...take the cannoli."

  10. #25
    Slow Worm's Avatar
    Slow Worm is offline Senior Member
    Join Date
    Jan 2008
    Location
    London UK
    Posts
    562
    Quote Originally Posted by YoungOldSol View Post
    I only asked about the terminology bf and gf because I hear them used so loosely. Llike: People say they have a girlfriend but it is not a monogamous relationship. You have heard of open relationships and swinging. This is what I am getting at. ..... I knew this stuff in elementary school but nowadays it is different and you hear all about open relationships, friends with benefits and all this added stuff, so I wonder if the basic definitions I learned in elementary school are still the same obviously. Because when you are a kid, things are a bit more cut and dry than when you get older.
    Perfectly valid points, and it was a perfectly valid question. In fact I'd say it verges on being a Socratic one. It is certainly a classic outsider question: equivalent to a person from a culture wholly isolated from Western culture asking about the meaning of Christmas in Western societies, and YOS is by her own account an outsider to sexual and romantic relationships and interactions.

    (I use a spoof report by a Martian who has been observing Earthlings to get discussion going among the students: the Martian has been observing Christmas practices, especially those linked to Santa Claus, and has also come upon Marxism, and concludes that Santa Claus has been invented and promoted by Marxists to instill distrust of supernatural and religious ideas, by first inciting children to believe in Santa and then revealing that he does not exist, with the aim of setting up a lifelong aversion to all spiritual and non-materialist ideas. The students are asked to decide how the Martian has made such an error, and how we can avoid doing the same in our own studies of humans).

    SW

  11. #26
    Slow Worm's Avatar
    Slow Worm is offline Senior Member
    Join Date
    Jan 2008
    Location
    London UK
    Posts
    562
    Quote Originally Posted by gorillagirl View Post
    There is no possible way you could be this naive/innocent
    I'd think it is perfectly credible. We are all capable of deciding to disregard or give low priorities to bodies of information which others consider vital and/or obvious.

    An example comes to mind of a conversation in a class recently. Some female students were discussing a possible visit to a "spa". I was puzzled as their references to travel seemed to assume a very short journey, while the nearest spa (as I understood the term) is probably Tonbridge Wells, about 60 miles away. Eventually I found that they were not referring to a natural mineral-rich spring used for bathing (as found at Bath, Tonbridge Wells, Cheltenham Spa, Llandrindod Wells, etc) but a shop where various beauty 'treatments' were provided. Apparently the word 'spa' has been used to mean such shops for some years, but this had never come to my notice at all.

    On a wider scale, much of the population of Europe (and probably elsewhere) used to believe that the Earth is flat, despite it being obvious that when an observer climbs a hill, the horizon appears to receed, and a little thought shows that this would only occur on a curved surface.

    I have a neighbour who despite running a successful business (suggesting a reasonably clear grasp of reality) believes that faries really exist and that the governments of the USA and Russia are conspiring to conceal technology devised by the Nazis in the 1930's and not separately re-discovered since. He really does not seem to grasp that any research conducted in the 1940's could certainly be replicated much more easily now and that it is quite implausible that an invention made and concealed 80 years ago would not have been independently re-discovered probably several times by now.

    SW
    AmandaAlice likes this.

  12. #27
    degausser is offline Senior Member
    Join Date
    Feb 2012
    Posts
    531
    Quote Originally Posted by YoungOldSol View Post
    No I don't feel I am bad but I often feel guilty.

    I appreciate the feedback and answers. I am not a religious person but I always try to do the right thing.
    What do you feel guilty about?

  13. #28
    theREALTrish's Avatar
    theREALTrish is offline Senior Member
    Join Date
    Mar 2006
    Location
    Rhode Island
    Posts
    1,262
    Quote Originally Posted by Slow Worm View Post
    I'd think it is perfectly credible. We are all capable of deciding to disregard or give low priorities to bodies of information which others consider vital and/or obvious.

    An example comes to mind of a conversation in a class recently. Some female students were discussing a possible visit to a "spa". I was puzzled as their references to travel seemed to assume a very short journey, while the nearest spa (as I understood the term) is probably Tonbridge Wells, about 60 miles away. Eventually I found that they were not referring to a natural mineral-rich spring used for bathing (as found at Bath, Tonbridge Wells, Cheltenham Spa, Llandrindod Wells, etc) but a shop where various beauty 'treatments' were provided. Apparently the word 'spa' has been used to mean such shops for some years, but this had never come to my notice at all.

    On a wider scale, much of the population of Europe (and probably elsewhere) used to believe that the Earth is flat, despite it being obvious that when an observer climbs a hill, the horizon appears to receed, and a little thought shows that this would only occur on a curved surface.

    I have a neighbour who despite running a successful business (suggesting a reasonably clear grasp of reality) believes that faries really exist and that the governments of the USA and Russia are conspiring to conceal technology devised by the Nazis in the 1930's and not separately re-discovered since. He really does not seem to grasp that any research conducted in the 1940's could certainly be replicated much more easily now and that it is quite implausible that an invention made and concealed 80 years ago would not have been independently re-discovered probably several times by now.

    SW
    That sounds like someone with mental health issues. It's possible for someone to run a successful business and be delusional in other regards.
    gorillagirl likes this.

  14. #29
    Faith's Avatar
    Faith is offline Some assembly required
    Join Date
    May 2007
    Location
    Left coast
    Posts
    2,419
    Quote Originally Posted by Slow Worm View Post
    I have a neighbour who despite running a successful business (suggesting a reasonably clear grasp of reality) believes that fairies really exist
    Now you've done it, SW. You just killed Tinkerbell.
    gorillagirl likes this.
    "Leave the gun...take the cannoli."

Page 2 of 2 FirstFirst 12

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •