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Thread: Happy OW/YM Stories

  1. #61
    kittylane's Avatar
    kittylane is offline Senior Member
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    Feb 2003
    Update, funny I read my post of many years ago and it was such a different world, real estate was booming, Adam was in Afghanistan and we were floating towards a new beginning.

    He is home two years his Sunday from the war. It has been a eye opener for me in real estate and him a highly honored soldier.... to find we have yet to find true financial security even though over and over again we had earned it.

    We did enjoy the high times and I flew so many times to Italy to his American base between missions.

    Now, we are home and making it and we are muddling thru a hard economy.

    It has not taken from our love, maybe we had the right stuff from the beginning to even get thru these hard times.

    I was blessed enough to be given a great husband regardless of his age.

    I see us together forever.

    Age gap relationships do work.
    Last edited by kittylane; 12-20-2008 at 04:37 PM. Reason: spelling

  2. #62
    djacynth Guest

    This is my story

    I thank God for this site. I was married for many years and my husband at the time, decided one day that he wanted to be single. So he left me and we ended up getting a divorce. I made a promise to my self that I would never get married again. I was so hurt by the way that he left me for no reason at all. We were married for 181/2 years have three children together.
    I never thought I could ever be able to trust another man ever again. So I was prepared to be single. I figured being single is not that bad my mom never remarried after divorcing my dad, she is perfectly fine.

    My friends kept telling me that I should join a singles site. I said no. Then I decided I wouldnt mind haveing someone as a friend, just someone to talk to and help me through my depression. So one day I joined A singles site. I didnt really like what i was reading in the profiles because the men seem to be looking for something that I was not interested in. I got an email about another singles site and that if I joined they would send me some sort of gift card so i said ok just for the fun of it. LOL.

    It was about the second day and I got a couple of emails from my ym it said he really wanted to get in touch with me because he thinks I am beautiful and he wants to talk to me. I said to my self heck no he doesnt even have his picture up, then I thought what if he is ugly LOL, all sorts of thoughts came to my mind. Then something (must be God) said to reply so I did. We started chatting online. The first thing he said was. "I dont know if you are the one for me but I want to take my time to get to know you". I said well all I am looking for is friendship.

    We talked for hours the first couple of days and by the first week we knew we were in love and meant to be together. He helped me to heal from my previous relationship and to get over all my insecurities. Oh I must mention that he lives in Africa. I cannot tell people about this because I get alot of criticizm. The age gap (he is 22 and I am 35), Us meeting online, and him being from africa. I almost broke up with him so many time because of the negative things I hear. I feel so excited about our relationship he loves me and my kids, we are so happy together. I feel sad because I have no one to share these happy feelings with.

    He treats me like I am a queen. He calls me his African Queen. We have been together now for almost a year and I am planning to meet him in person for the first time in february, I am going to Africa. The things we do for love. I would have never thought I would leave The U.S. and go all the way to another country to find love. I am very nervous about my trip. This is all new to me, but everything in me tells me to go for it. I feel so weird because of all the negativity.

    This site has really help me thank you all so much. Sorry this is so long. Please feel free to give me any Advice, or encourageing words etc.

  3. #63
    kezune is offline Neophyte
    Join Date
    Mar 2007
    I don't post often but I read all the time. I just wanted to add to "happy ending" older women/ younger man story. I am now 39 and he is 27. I sold my Townhouse in April and we bought a house together. We had been engaged in JUly 07 and we got married in Oct 2008. We also found out in June that we were going to have a baby. Yes you can not skip your pill even for a day at the rip age of 38. We are expecting our son in March which is a first child for both of us.

    It was not easy and I thank all the women here for sharing their stories because it give me a lot of moral support very early in the relationship.

  4. #64
    christina923 is offline Senior Member
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    Nov 2003
    CT, USA

  5. #65
    christina923 is offline Senior Member
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    Nov 2003
    CT, USA
    dj... have a wonderful safe trip!!!

  6. #66
    CuriousGeorge Guest

    Red face Events can shape the people we become and it's because of her that I'm the man I am.

    One time in grade 3 my french teacher bent down to help me with a question and I totally saw her boobs through the collar of her sweater. This is highly regarded as the best thing that's ever happened to me.

  7. #67
    sisterhoney61 Guest
    Since I'm new here, I'll share my story with everyone here. I've read through the other posts on this thread and I want to add my voice in saying that these age-gap relationships do work.

    I was married from April, 1987 until December, 1996. My ex was three years older than I was. He was also an alcoholic, a drug addict and was emotionally, verbally and physically abusive to me. I almost died twice in that marriage: once by my own hand and once by his. When I finally broke free and was on my own I was a wreck. In the final year of my marriage I had gone back to college at the age of 35. I was surrounded by thousands of men on campus, but I wanted nothing to do with them. I needed time to heal.

    One main problem was that I had completely lost my sense of self. I no longer knew who I was anymore. I had spent so much time focusing on my ex and what he was or wasn't doing, that I no longer paid attention to what I was doing. Whole gaps of time are missing in my memory. I spent the first half of the 1990s on autopilot. I can remember bits and pieces of incidents, but I couldn't tell you when they occurred.

    In 1998 I decided to go onto the Internet. I'd heard people raving about the chat rooms and the dating sites and the likes, so I decided to check them out. I had no intentions of meeting men online. I was only looking to make some new friends. I was fascinated by the idea that you could chat live with people all over the world. I went onto Yahoo Chat and discovered the roleplaying game rooms, which was kind of like playing D&D without the dice rolls and which was done solely in text form. I met someone in one of the rooms in December 1998.

    Our characters hit it off right away and soon we were sending private messages to each other so that we could learn about each other. He was in CA and I was in TN. I knew that he was younger than I was and that he still lived at home with his parents, but since I wasn't planning on the relationship being anything other than chat friends, I didn't ask him just how young he was.

    In the summer of 1999 he moved with his family from CA to MI. When he returned back online we picked up right where we left off. Then things began to change. We began chatting a lot more together, 6-8 hours, or more, every day. Finally he confessed that he had fallen for me and I confessed that I felt the same way. Then we both dropped the bombshells. I was 37 and he was 18. At first I said no way, I can't do this. But I realized that I was in too deep and there was no backing out. So we exchanged photos, e-mail addresses, snail mail addresses and phone numbers.

    He came down to visit me during my Christmas vacation from classes. He stayed with me until shortly after New Year's Day. We knew during that visit that we wanted to be together. He came back to me in late January and moved in with me. Then on Valentine's Day he proposed. We got married on October 13, 2000. Yes, it was a Friday the 13th and it was a full moon Friday. I had that Thursday and Friday off as fall break from school. We went down to the Knox County Courthouse and got married. It was kind of funny when I went back to school and work (I worked on campus) on Monday and people asked me what I did over fall break. I got to flash them my wedding ring and tell them that I got married.

    My husband is nothing like my ex. With my ex we had nothing in common, except for sex, and after awhile, that was gone as well. My husband and I have a lot of common hobbies: we enjoy traveling, attending Renaissance faires, shopping, playing video games, watching movies, hiking, etc. He doesn't drink or do drugs. He accepts me completely. My ex was an atheist who felt that any kind of religious/spiritual expression was wrong. I'm a Pagan and have been one all my life. He browbeat me so badly about my religion that I took down my altar and packed away all my books. My husband is agnostic and he accepts my Paganism and doesn't try to tell me what to believe or how to worship. I was so focused on my ex that I gave up my hobbies. My husband encourages me to enjoy what I like to do. So I went back to belly dancing and writing and beading and all the other things that I like to do.

    I never once heard my ex tell me that I was beautiful or sexy. My husband tells me that every day. My ex would not say "I love you" unless I said it first. My husband needs no prompting. My ex refused to kiss me or hold hands in public. My husband has no problem with PDAs. We can look at each other and tell what the other one is thinking. We finish each other's sentences. I could not imagine my life without him in it.

  8. #68
    joesbabygirl's Avatar
    joesbabygirl is offline Senior Member
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    Dec 2008

    I want to say so much more about the above post .... but im at a loss of words. I think its kinda ironic how the first husband is always a jerk. I think its us, as women ... we kind of go through our 20s dreaming that the one were with is going to become whom we really want him to be. But when it gets to far gone, gets so bad, and we realise that it will never happen. The next guy that we allow into our hearts, has to live up to such a higher standard. Luckily for us weve been able to find them.

    I always maintained that I dont know what Im looking for, to do that would cut off so many great potential suitors. I just know what I dont want.

    Im just lucky that what I dont want ... isnt within the man Im with right now.

  9. #69
    minasmom Guest

    I'll throw ours up here

    Since I am back, I guess I will throw our story up here as well.

    Well firstly, I am 40 and Andrew is 24. I was married to my high school sweet heart for 12 years-we were together for 17. We married for all of the wrong reasons, young, stupid, etc. During our marriage he cheated on me alot, and I him. He was physically abusive and towards the end of our relationship he would just spend all of our money on toys and never come home. During that time, I met Jeff online in a game called Everquest. We started out as friends, and really after a fight or something, he would be my support. At the time we met, he was 15! I was 32. As you can imagine, it was strictly friends for quite some time. After he turned 18 and went to college, we still talked and played online together and had started talking on the phone. At that point, I was in the process of leaving my husband, and Jeff was very supportive. I remember crying to him many times on the phone and one night I think I said something like "I'm just scared to be alone-I have no one." and he replied that I had him. I think we both confessed our feelings to each other.

    That Thanksgiving, I flew out to meet him and we had a great time. The next spring, he moved out to where I lived and started college locally. Mid semester that year we moved in together. Jeff and I lived together for 5 years. The last year we broke up many times and finally had become "just roommates". He had alot of personal issues. He had gained alot of weight, stopped going to school, never worked, etc. He was just very depressed. I finally told him that he needed to leave and he went back to live with his parents in Virginia. He is still struggling with depression and anxiety issues, but we remain close.

    During our relationship, we still played online games-mainly World of Warcraft. This is where I met Andrew, my husband). I knew him for 3 years much of which was while Jeff and I were together. During that time we became friends and much like how the relationship with Jeff started, Andrew was my listening ear for problems (I wonder how many relationships have started that way). After Jeff and I broke up, I really was not interested in anyone younger, ever again. But it happened. Andrew came out to visit and a month later moved in. I would not recommend moving that fast to anyone else. But it has worked for us. There really was no other option at the time. It was do that or break up pretty much as neither of us could deal with the long distance thing any longer.

    That was 2 years ago. We have been married for 10 months and I am 7 months pregnant with our first baby (a girl). I have never been happier in my life. He is very patient and in a way alot more mature and level headed than I am. He understands me and I think he is the only person in my life that I can say that about.

  10. #70
    SuperGirl's Avatar
    SuperGirl is offline His "Old Lady" lol
    Join Date
    May 2007
    Beautiful Ohio
    YAY!!! I LOVED your story!!!! Good luck to the both of you and GRATS on that baby!!!

    On a side note....we used to play WOW frequently as well. Then we bought our house in the country and BAM! No high speed. Sure, we can get dial up but ya Can't pwn with lag!!!! You're dead before ya know it! hehe. Actually, it's been good for us. We spend more time doing yard work now!! hehe.
    What a long, strange trip it's been.

  11. #71
    vero209 Guest

    hi there

    Hi everyone,
    I joined this site because I wanted to see if there was someone going through a similar situation as mine.
    I met my boyfriend online I was 32 he was 19. at first we didnt seem to care about our age because we didnt ask. For the first month I also thought he was Mexican like me because I had spoke/wrote to him in spanish and he understood me. After a month we realize there was a age difference of 13yrs and I found out he was Indian(Asian). well he was born and raised here in the states but his parents were from India. I was very surprised but we seem to get along very well..well friends we have been together for 6yrs(dating) he still lives at home with parents due to tradition. as you can imagine his mother dont approve and I have never met his parents face to face..In the beginning his mother liked me very much because she seen that I had a great influence on Vik (boyfriend). but as soon as she found out I had children she stopped talking to me on the phone.Its been 6yrs and Vik and I have a great relationship, we love to do the same things and we seldom disagree on anything, exept for the fact that he can not stand up for our relationship with his mom.. I feel that my patience is running out and I am going to have to separate from him because of that. I would hate to loose him because we do get along very well and I feel that we make a perfect couple.. I know that Vik knows this but he dont want to make his mom unhappy..any advise for me from anyone that has gone through the same ordeal?

  12. #72
    MidnightRayne Guest

    remember us

    It's been a long time since I've been here.

    Don't feel like posting a full story now, But hun and I are still together, and yeh it's been years

    9 years or so, who even keeps count, We don't, we just go with it.

    We have a 16 year age gap for those of you who don't remember me.

    The only thing I say is, hurry up hun and age some more, cause it's very hard to hold onto time and make it stop for much longer..haha my joke to him, I figure if he ages faster I wont have to hold on so much we can age together haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaha


  13. #73
    Kristin's Avatar
    Kristin is offline Senior Member
    Join Date
    Jul 2004
    Quote Originally Posted by Kristin View Post
    We have been together 4 years now and we are just as much, if not more, in the honeymoon "phase" as we were on day one. We were married July 22nd, 2007 & had a baby together October 22, 2006!

    I have no more doubts. I can't, in my wildest dreams, see feeling any different about him or him about me. I feel so secure in this relationship like I haven't felt since my first husband (Jeremy being the second). And I can't see it changing at all.

    I hope this will be an inspiration to those who may think, "Can it ever work?"
    Update: Happier than ever! Had our 5 year anniversary in July. Baby is almost 3. Bought our first house last month. Life is good!!

  14. #74
    PinkCat's Avatar
    PinkCat is offline Animals are people too!
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    Jan 2003
    Vancouver, BC
    These updates are great!

    I'm still with my boyfriend of almost 7 years. Things are good. We are planning our yearly trip in a couple months... heading to Spain and Morocco this time. Other than that, we are just a regular boring couple!!

    Lesson learned: do not attempt a battle of wits with an unarmed opponent.

  15. #75
    LaRomantica's Avatar
    LaRomantica is offline Senior Member
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    Dec 2009
    Thanks to everyone for sharing your stories, I read every single page and was very touched but better yet, the main purpose for the search that led me here has been accomplished. Even though I own a book about OW/YM relationships written by two female psychologists themselves married to YM, I still thought "Nah, I should not think about that", but I've always looked younger than my age and can get along with all different age groups, I also believe that the soul is ageless so why should we limit our choice of mate by age just because our bodies don't remain "young"?

    So seeing cases of real couples and some pictures has renewed my belief that I can too think about that without being a "cougar" or "desperate" (hate hat word!) and I'm grateful for that. In reality I have a limit of age 35, I don't think I could be interested at all in someone much younger because I have a 27 y.o. son myself and in observing him and his friends, they may be level-headed for some things but not for others and I just could not deal with that as I'm very down to earth and still a little old-fashioned and in some ways I'd still prefer the man to take the lead.

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