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Thread: Moving In Together!!!!!

  1. #1
    Angel2seee Guest

    Talking Moving In Together!!!!!

    Thanks to everyone for continue support .. I just wanted to update somewhat on here.. After exactly 4 months we are moving in together .. we have hit some ruffles in the water .. but he is the BEST thing that has ever happened to me .. and since we have spent just about every night together .. I have been able to trust him more .. as he has been able to trust me more .. we have an awesome relationship!! .. We still have " other factors " that try to interfere .. in our lives .. you know .. my son's daddy drama .. and his baby moma drama .. but we learned how to over come that .. and it pulled us even closer together .. I know I have a good relationship now .. my man is so caring and kind to me .. .. he caters to me in sooo many ways .. I don't even have to ask ... he is a good friend to my son .. and a great friend to me ... I hit the jackpot!!! .. If anyone tells you AGE MATTERS .. I'm here to tell you .. it doesn't .. we are not in love because of our ages ..but because of WHO he is and WHO I am to him!! So we are taking that step .. I've sold my house .. and am moving into his .. just after Thanksgiving .. My son is somewhat excited about the change .. but he is 14 and I'm sure he will adjust no matter what .... we are trying to accomadate him in every way possible ... Anyway I just had to update yall .. alot have given me advice .. some good .. some bad ... and it helped me to look at both sides of the fence .. thank you ageless ... I am praying my life with Gregg will last just that ... a lifetime ...
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  2. #2
    Kristin's Avatar
    Kristin is offline Senior Member
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    Well, I'm certainly glad you didn't "cut him loose" over the "ex" issues like so many people told you!! (I figured it was more your insecurities and not HIM.)

    You are too cute - you guys remind me A LOT of Jeremy and me in the beginning. I hope you have the same happy ending (well...it's on-going like any relationship, but we're happy NOW!)

    I was glad to see that he already has a kid - that takes away a BIG hurdle often seen with guys in the typical "pre-kid" years. Now you'll just have the same blending families issues like everyone else - but the advantage that your YM might "get" your son more than some 40 year old guy. My oldest was 14 when I moved in with Jeremy, too. They had a lot of fun on Xbox, LOL!

    Best wishes to the both of you!!

  3. #3
    legallyblonde Guest

    Huh?

    Moving in after only four months? I think that's pushing it.

    Ali

  4. #4
    miu Guest
    Please be careful of your heart and use financial commonsense. It was only one month ago that you had concerns about him talking with his ex. What will you do with the money from selling your house? Keep it in your own account as your rainy day fund. Good luck, but be smart about this.

    I've lived with my YM for three years now. So far, so good. We split the bills equally, but keep our accounts separate.

  5. #5
    irparis Guest
    I'm with legallyB...

    Does anyone ever learn to be on their own just because they need to get their life and their self respect in order, or is it always a round of playing musical available houses. But, you're moving in with him...oh hell no...not while I have a kid and this relationship has had issues and myself and my kid may have to move out. My kid belongs in his own stable environment, not moving in with someone after 4 months...yes, they are adaptable, but they also learn relationship skills from their caregivers/role models for future reference either with same age partner or ow themselves.

    I don't know...something doesn't sound right as it is more for the convenience of the adults. And with the ex issues and his own mental issues, if it becomes too much for you or him, who will get to move out. How prepare are you if you do have to move out.

    I wanted to edit here to please be careful. If it were just you, fine...get your head chopped off if you want to, but you have a kid so it isn't all about you and this ym and what you get out of it.

    Paris
    Last edited by irparis; 11-21-2007 at 11:14 PM.

  6. #6
    tinydancer Guest
    Does he own his house???
    You do have a 14 year old son and you are moving from a home that you own and are moving into the man's home with your child.
    No offense but.....what happens to you and your son if it doesn't work out?
    I am not trying to be negative.....just smart.
    4 months is nothing in the grand scheme of things and you are moving in with him to accomodate him and his "situation".....I just wouldn't do it myself but....I truly wish you all of the best.
    Isn't he the dude who he and the ex don't even have physical custody of the child?
    The grandparents are raising the kid correct?
    I just say.....think really hard.
    Blessings, TD

  7. #7
    miu Guest
    Angel2seee - BTW I am very happy that you are so happy with your YM these days. But moving in with with him after knowing him only four months, plus your son is involved... it's a serious move, just be careful.

    Hugs,
    miu

  8. #8
    grumpysgirl Guest
    I am happy to see you both have worked threw those Ex issue hurdles!
    You both have the power over that so stay strong on that!

    I wish you both the best of luck and keep us updated!!!!!!
    HUGS!

    PS since this is so new I would not give up your house..you had issues so early on in this relationship ..so take it slower and be careful. Your son comes first. just be careful
    Last edited by grumpysgirl; 11-22-2007 at 01:03 PM.

  9. #9
    opal Guest

    best wishes, but...

    I'm sorry, I have to chime in with the meanies here. You are clearly infatuated rather than in a stable relationship. You speak about Gregg in fantastic superlatives and almost dismiss your son's needs. Please think twice and again about this decision.

  10. #10
    Angel2seee Guest

    Thanks and re my son

    some of yall don't know .. some do know .. less than 2 years ago my husband ( now Ex ) battered me ( not the first time ) and my son ( the first time ) and for the 2nd time I pressed charges .. I have a protective order .. but ... because he is incarcerated .. and is getting out soon .. I wanted to move away from where we were .. I hope you all can understand that I actually am putting my son first ... My son wants to move too before his dad gets out .. and we feel better being with gregg than alone .. I hope everyone doesn't get down on me for that .. but I just feel strongly that it's the right thing to do .. Thank you all .. for your understanding .. and I'm smart .. we have a nest egg just in case

  11. #11
    opal Guest
    Quote Originally Posted by Angel2seee View Post
    some of yall don't know .. some do know .. less than 2 years ago my husband ( now Ex ) battered me ( not the first time ) and my son ( the first time ) and for the 2nd time I pressed charges .. I have a protective order .. but ... because he is incarcerated .. and is getting out soon .. I wanted to move away from where we were .. I hope you all can understand that I actually am putting my son first ... My son wants to move too before his dad gets out .. and we feel better being with gregg than alone .. I hope everyone doesn't get down on me for that .. but I just feel strongly that it's the right thing to do .. Thank you all .. for your understanding .. and I'm smart .. we have a nest egg just in case
    I have been where you are, I am a survivor as well. But being alone is not that bad. And sometimes it's necessary. Take care.

  12. #12
    Angel's Avatar
    Angel is offline Anger Thrives In A Fool
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    Best wishes for a peaceful and happy journey together.
    there before the threshold, I saw a brighter world beyond myself

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  13. #13
    yellowrose's Avatar
    yellowrose is offline Texas Gal
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    I don't blame you for wanting another male in your home, esp. given your ex's behavior.

    Just be 'advised' that some men do not show their true colors until after a year or so.

    I hope your relationship is one of the long term successful ones!

  14. #14
    legallyblonde Guest

    I was reading this thread to Sara and this is what she had to say!

    I was reading this thread to Sara, and she wanted me to add her two cents.

    "After three marriages, one to a calm man who was also an alcoholic, the other to a crack addict, who wore his hat backwards by the way and whom I moved in with after only three months and then married, and then after having lived with Wayne, the most abusive male in Maryland for for years, when I had a minor child who lived with me, I've learned a lot."

    1. Keep your money in your name.

    2. Don't pay his bills. (If he doesn't like it, tough.)

    3. Become close reliable friends with your boss and work very hard for your boss, because it might become necessary for you to confide in him/her one day.

    4. Make sure the house you rent or own is in YOUR name.

    5. Don't tell him what your finances are, it's none of his business.

    6. If you kid is afraid of him (my kid was afraid of Wayne) run for the hills. My youngest son ended up at 18 and at college becoming extremely depressed and suicidal. The reason is because he was upset over stepparent issues. He'd been internalizing EVERYTHING forever, and I didn't know it and it overwhelmed him. He ended up in counseling and in a psych hospital. He's recovered but it took about three years to do it.

    7. Men are more attracted to an independent woman who has her own means.

    8. I think you could go to a women's shelter if you are afraid of you ex and you do not have a place that is safe to stay. FOR FREE!!!

    9. Sign a prenup if you decide to get married.

    10. Beware of any Male where any ex or family member will not let him visit his children. Be skeptical of any excuses of explanations they have.

    11. Lastly and finally, backwards hats do it in for me. I want to date an adult male not a hip hop yo yo guy."

    PS Ali agrees completely with number ELEVEN! I've been burned by the babies, and don't want to deal with it. Backwards hats are a total turnoff.

    Well, that's what HadleyMannassas/Kerri had to say about your situation.

    Ali

  15. #15
    Kristin's Avatar
    Kristin is offline Senior Member
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    Are you talking about him in her avatar - with his hat backwards?

    The angle is from above and the brim probably blocked out half his face so he turned it around for the pic. Jeremy does the same thing when the brim gets in the way - especially if he has hat hair.

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