Falling to Pieces....

Yesterday I had to come to a decision to put one of my dogs to sleep. Its been a decision thats been luming about me for awhile, but I have to say, Ive been selfish is wanting to keep her, Mollie, around as long as possible.

Shes a pure bred rottweilor, who my ex-husband bought for me and my kids for Christmas in 1994. She was 8 weeks old and he put a huge red ribbon around her head....She was just beautiful. Shes had a full loving life. Shes the only dog I know that has not only raised her own puppies but also kittens and piglets! Shes taken a back seat to my labs over the years. The labs are so much more demanding of our attention, but shes just always been there. Shes the real matriarch of our little family.

Shes young I know to be put down but the last couple years, shes had mini-maul seizures, urinary tract infections, a tumor removed (major surgery there) and now, though happy and content, she has lost control of her hind legs. It keeps getting worse, where I used to encourage her to walk, I now have to carry a 90 pound dog up and down my stairs to get her out to do her buisness...half the time now shes ends up sitting in it. The other night she actually had an accident in the house...she just couldnt get up or have the energy to bark for me. She slipped and fell the other morning and it shook me up so bad I cried for her.

I know this is best for her. She cant be too happy, shes just knows better. Shes knows its wrong to have accidents in the house...but does she know I forgive her. So we are going to pamper her this last weekend, me ex husband is coming over and his parents...my son is coming to say good bye. Tuesday she has an appointment with her vet who loves her too. Im going to have her cremated and her ashes returned to me...

In the mean time, Im at work with silent tears streaming down my face...

[greeneyedgirl]

oh how heart-breaking.
she knows you forgive her gal, she see's it in your face and hears it in your voice and it's confirmed by your actions....she knows.

big hugs for you.

Tracy

[PinkCat]

I have tears for you and your doggie...

You are definitely doing the right thing, heartbreaking as it is. My thoughts are with you.

Oh, I am SO sorry, Michele. ((((((HUGS))))))) I know just how heartbreaking this can be and the grieving process takes time, both before doing it and after. I'm terribly sorry for you and your extended family who loves her.

It's amazing to me how deeply these animals are taken into our hearts. But they are. They are family.

I hope your last weekend with her is a good one full of love and rememberances of the great times you've had together. Stay strong.

~phos

Thank you ... I just cant stop the tears just yet...Im gonna post some pictures of her that are truly wonderful....cuddling with her kids, her cats and her kittens...as I think of those moments Im smiling as I cry.

[tinydancer]

Michelle..........My heart goes out to you.
I had a German Shepherd "Annie", and had to have a hip replacement done on her when she was very young (the humane society and I closed down the puppy mill that she came from, but that's another story) Anyway, she rejected the replacements and I, selfishly, couldn't let her go.........I carried that dog, literly, for several years. I finally put her down when she was 8. I still, 15 years later, think about her from time to time but I know that I finally did do the right thing.
Now I have my "Luka" another German Shepherd, he is 2 and I pray that his hips stay intact for a long time. Bigger dogs, as you probably know, are prone to hip dysplasia
God bless you...........you are doing the right thing too and know that she knows it too.
I think they kind of let us know when they have had enough and for her to feel bad about her "accidents" is a real good sign that she does.
Blessings, Tinydancer

I am sorry for your loss.

My deepest condolences, Michelle. I'm sorry I'm late posting these:


FROM FRIEND TO FRIEND
You're giving me a special gift,
So sorrowfully endowed,
And through these last few cherished days,
Your courage makes me proud.

But really, love is knowing
When your best friend is in pain,
And understanding earthly acts
Will only be in vain.

So looking deep into your eyes,
Beyond, into your soul,
I see in you the magic, that will
Once more make me whole.

The strength that you possess,
Is why I look to you today,
To do this thing that must be done,
For it's the only way.

That strength is why I've followed you,
And chose you as my friend,
And why I've loved you all these years...
My partner 'til the end.

Please, understand just what this gift,
You're giving, means to me,
It gives me back the strength I've lost,
And all my dignity.

You take a stand on my behalf,
For that is what friends do.
And know that what you do is right,
For I believe it too.

So one last time, I breathe your scent,
And through your hand I feel,
The courage that's within you,
To now grant me this appeal.

Cut the leash that holds me here,
Dear friend, and let me run,
Once more a strong and steady dog,
My pain and struggle done.

And don't despair my passing,
For I won't be far away,
Forever here, within your heart,
And memory I'll stay.

I'll be there watching over you,
Your ever faithful friend,
And in your memories I'll run,
...a young dog once again.

In Memory of Asta, Feb. 1997
(c) Karen Clouston

----------------------

A Dog's Plea
Treat me kindly, my beloved friend, for no heart in all the world is more grateful for kindness than the loving heart of me.
Do not break my spirit with a stick, for though I should lick your hand between blows, your patience and understanding will more quickly teach me the things you would have me learn.
Speak to me often, for your voice is the world's sweetest music, as you must know by the fierce wagging of my tail when your footstep falls upon my waiting ear.
Please take me inside when it is cold and wet, for I am a domesticated animal, no longer accustomed to bitter elements.
Keep my pan filled with fresh water, for I cannot tell you when I suffer thirst. Feed me clean food that I may stay well, to romp and play and do your bidding, to walk by your side and stand ready, willing and able to protect you with my life, should your life be in danger. I ask no greater glory than the privledge of sitting at your feet beside the hearth.
And, my friend, when I am very old and I no longer enjoy good health, hearing and sight, do not make heroic efforts to keep me going. I am not having any fun. Please see that my trusting life is taken gently. I shall leave this earth knowing with the last breath I draw that my fate was always safest in your hands.
~Author Unknown

Thank you Chatterbox

I got a call today from the Vet saying Mollie was back....Im happy about that. At least I know shell be at home. Ill probably scatter her ashes over the hillside she loved to sunbathe in..... She was a very special dog and I miss her immensely!